# The Perfect Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 14, 2005, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461 "2005-03-14T14:22:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/53a042/32.png) [@RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RancidYakButterTeaParty)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/1 "2005-03-14T14:22:47Z")
This is it, so don’t screw it up. A thread of incredible intelligence and wit. A thread that will make you laugh, cry, and possibly regurgitate your pie. Feel free to add your own “post of perfection”, but make sure you don’t screw it up. It has taken me years to come up with this idea. Perfection will now ensue… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/2 "2005-03-14T14:25:35Z")
Word! ---
**Author:** ![RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/53a042/32.png) [@RancidYakButterTeaParty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RancidYakButterTeaParty)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/3 "2005-03-14T14:28:55Z")
I forgot to add that the 5 most famous dopers of all time, and even Cecil himself gave me their personal assurances that they would be replying to this thread shortly. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/4 "2005-03-14T14:41:04Z")
Feel the Force, Luke. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/5 "2005-03-14T14:51:07Z")
> [@RancidYakButterTeaParty](#): > > I forgot to add that the 5 most famous dopers of all time, and even Cecil himself gave me their personal assurances that they would be replying to this thread shortly. Well, I’m here; when are the other four supposed to show up? ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/6 "2005-03-14T15:01:35Z")
Ummm…wuzzle wozzle? ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/7 "2005-03-14T15:59:40Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Well, I’m here; when are the other four supposed to show up? We should be ok as long as all of us get in on the first page. ---
**Author:** ![klintypooh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3da27b/32.png) [@klintypooh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klintypooh)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/8 "2005-03-14T16:11:59Z")
Well I’d like to think I’m gonna be famous so I’ll get a pre emptive post in. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/9 "2005-03-14T16:19:23Z")
Hey, I _know_ I’m going to be famous one day, so here _I_ am. You may all start basking in the wonderful glow of my superior presence now. Don’t forget those sunglasses. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/10 "2005-03-14T17:41:29Z")
You know, there was a perfect thread … ---
**Author:** ![moonstarssun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@moonstarssun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moonstarssun)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/11 "2005-03-14T18:22:57Z")
::stands up to say something brilliant, goes blank, slinks out of the room:: ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/12 "2005-03-14T18:24:52Z")
> [@RancidYakButterTeaParty](#): > > This is it, so don’t screw it up. > > A thread of incredible intelligence and wit. A thread that will make you laugh, cry, and possibly regurgitate your pie. > > Feel free to add your own “post of perfection”, but make sure you don’t screw it up. It has taken me years to come up with this idea. > > Perfection will now ensue… Hi, Opal! 1920s-style Death Ray! I burning your dog! The Marianas Trench! For 20 minutes! LOLOLOL!!!111111oneoneoneeleven ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/13 "2005-03-14T18:36:47Z")
Sausage ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/14 "2005-03-14T18:38:16Z")
When come back bring 3.1415926535897932384626433832795… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5ac83/32.png) [@The\_Mad\_Hermit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Mad_Hermit)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/15 "2005-03-14T18:58:00Z")
Here’s an appearance by the **least** famous Doper. The rest of the “Bottom Five” will be along shortly. ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/16 "2005-03-14T19:03:11Z")
all your base… ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/17 "2005-03-14T19:07:28Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#): > > When come back bring 3.1415926535897932384626433832795… **Pi IS EXACTLY THREE!** Ok that got your attention, mmhey mhey. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/18 "2005-03-14T20:03:44Z")
How about a post from one of the Middle Five Dopers? I think I’m pretty much exactly average around here. Oh, for this special occasion, my signature will also be included for posterity. ---
**Author:** ![dare\_devil007](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@dare\_devil007](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dare_devil007)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/19 "2005-03-14T20:13:45Z")
> [@The Mad Hermit](#): > > Here’s an appearance by the **least** famous Doper. > > The rest of the “Bottom Five” will be along shortly. I’m here… ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461/20 "2005-03-14T21:43:12Z")
> [@Lobsang](#): > > Pi IS EXACTLY THREE! Well, sure, if you’re not that hungry. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perfect-thread/294461.md?page=2)