# The Pope Masturbation Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 24, 2000, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384 "2000-09-24T19:38:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/21 "2000-09-25T19:36:44Z")
> [@](#): > > If Christians didn’t stick their belief in everyone’s face the jokes at their expense would wither on the vine. They’re asking for it. This is just the stereotypical image of the overzealous fundie. I, for one, have never had an experience like this because the vast, VAST majority of Christians are not like this. Of course thare ARE overzealous fundies who do go round preaching Hell to non believers but they are very, very few compared to the 99.99999 of Christians who don’t go around preaching. Also > [@](#): > > They’re asking for it. Who’s asking for it? The fundamentalists? Well if that’s the case then make fun of them, not the Pope. ---
**Author:** ![Freyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freyr/32/5763_2.png) [@Freyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freyr)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/22 "2000-09-25T19:48:12Z")
\*\*Gomez wrote: Its not about respecting the Pope, I doubt he’s a straight dope regular anyway (unless he’s Satan, now that WOULD be funny) it’s about respecting those people on this board who believe that he’s God’s representative on earth.\*\* Then Roman Catholics ought to pick a better leader instead of someone who’s hostile to other people and faiths that are simply different than his own. If the Pope is making **OFFICIAL** commentary this is derisive of other people and other faiths, that gives me the right to be openly derisive of him. Like I said, respect is a two-way street; if you want some, you gotta give some. ---
**Author:** ![Germ\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85e7bf/32.png) [@Germ\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Germ_Boy)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/23 "2000-09-25T19:58:06Z")
How about a guy who is the head of a religion that actually proclaims itself to be the **ONE TRUE FAITH**? If that’s not a fundie, then, praytell, what is? Oh, and, Gomez, where do you get those statistics? I don’t remember any census questions pertaining to whether I’d ever buttonholed someone about their faith. ---
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/24 "2000-09-25T20:08:35Z")
> [@](#): > > Then Roman Catholics ought to pick a better leader instead of someone who’s hostile to other people and faiths that are simply different than his own. I don’t care about the Pope’s diplomatic qualities or lack of them. The point I was trying to make is that he is internationally revered and looked up to by millions of people and so it is disrespectful to them to make jokes about him. I think that the Catholic Church is the victim of a double standard when it comes to basic respect in so far as other faiths seem to get a lot more of it. Germboy, you said > [@](#): > > How about a guy who is the head of a religion that actually proclaims itself to be the ONE TRUE FAITH? Well what would you expect him to say? A statement to the Contrary would be akin to saying “Shop at Walmart, we have the lowest prices around, except for K-mart and Asda who are just as good as us in every way”. It wouldn’t be a good advert for Christianity o say otherwise, would it? BTW, what statistics do you mean? When I said 99.99999… I was just trying to emphasise that the majority of Christians don’t go around shoving their faith in your face. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/25 "2000-09-25T20:14:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*\*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > > Does anyone else find it funny that he says that participants of organized religion are usually assholes and morons, but also gets mad about a lighthearted joke about the Pope? > > I don’t hate the Pope-he’s done a lot more good than he has bad. However, I just find KG’s statements contradictary… > hmmmm… > \*\* When I described organized religion as bullshit, and its adherents as often being assholes or morons, I was not singling out any particular group. This is unlike the Pope thread which does. If you don’t see the difference I will take it as evidence that being a moron is not unique to those who participate in organized religion. You say “ **lighhearted joke about the Pope** ”. Give me a fucking break. Lighthearted? Again, if you can’t see why some people could be totally offended and outraged by such ‘lighthearted’ jokes, it proves my point further. You say that I was “ **mad** ” about it. No, I was more ashamed. Ashamed that the SDMB, a bastion of intelligent discussion on the net, a place I frequent, allowed it to go on. Maybe you can tell us some ‘lighthearted’ kike or nigger jokes? This seems to be the place for such innocent comedy. ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/26 "2000-09-25T20:16:03Z")
> [@](#): > > The point I was trying to make is that he is internationally revered and looked up to by millions of people and so it is disrespectful to them to make jokes about him. Louis Farrakhan and L. Ron Hubbard are, respectively, looked up to by millions of people and internationally revered, but I bet you’ll see plenty of Nation of Islam and Scientology cracks here. (Like the recent Scientology thread in GD.) So does the Pope get a free pass? ---
**Author:** ![Germ\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85e7bf/32.png) [@Germ\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Germ_Boy)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/27 "2000-09-25T20:26:37Z")
Amazing, ain’t it, that 0.00001% of a religious constituent can raise such a ruckus. You Wrote: “he is internationally revered and looked up to by millions of people and so it is disrespectful to them to make jokes about him” So, because someone is revered by millions, that excludes them from joking or ridicule? I say pour it on! The mighty must be looked at suspiciously especially when they can bring out the sense in their followers that to mock them is blasphemy. Too easy to slink away and refuse to tell the emperor he’s buck-nekkid. Gomez, aside, it’s a joke at the expense of a man who is the head a paternalistic, backward thinking **(I said no condoms, we need more Catholic mouths to feed!)**, women disempowering, incredibly rich religion. The joke is on the hierarchy. I’ve got a bunch of Catholic friends and they’ve been the source of some of the best religious jokes (Catholic and non-) ever. ---
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/28 "2000-09-25T20:59:13Z")
Germ boy, the figure I quoted wasn’t meant as an accurate, mathematical assessment of the percentage of Christians who are fundies, it was just meant to emphasise that the vast, vast majority of Christians are not fundamentalist. > [@](#): > > So, because someone is revered by millions, that excludes them from joking or ridicule? I say pour it on! And I say don’t, I say that, not because I’m a Christian because I’m not but because I feel that, as the leader of the Catholic Church on earth, some respect is due to the people who believe in the God he represents. This respect can in part be afforded by not cracking wank jokes at the expense of Gods earthly representative. Also phil > [@](#): > > Louis Farrakhan and L. Ron Hubbard are, respectively, looked up to by millions of people and internationally revered, but I bet you’ll see plenty of Nation of Islam and Scientology cracks here. (Like the recent Scientology thread in GD.) So does the Pope get a free pass? Good point. The way I see it, I think it’s wrong to crack jokes about any religious figure in a public place such as this board because it disrespects the people who believes in Scientology as much as it disrespects L Ron himself. The Pope shouldn’t have a free pass because he shouldn’t need one. He should be as free from ridicule as leaders of other religions who (Farrakhan and Hubbard excepted) IMHO get a bit more respect. ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/29 "2000-09-25T21:23:02Z")
\*sigh I really didn’t intend on my stupid thread to cause any discord. I really didn’t even think that I would get more than 5 replies to it. It was purile, callow, immature, and all those other synonyms for childish. I’m sorry if I offended anyone, please accept my apologies. Can’t we all just get along? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/30 "2000-09-25T21:36:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sk8rixtx \* > \*\*\*sigh > I really didn’t intend on my stupid thread to cause any discord. I really didn’t even think that I would get more than 5 replies to it. It was purile, callow, immature, and all those other synonyms for childish. I’m sorry if I offended anyone, please accept my apologies. > Can’t we all just get along? ☹ \*\* Thank you! You have restored my faith in the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![Gomez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d78d45/32.png) [@Gomez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gomez)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/31 "2000-09-25T21:58:18Z")
I agree! Lets put this one to bed, shall we? ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/32 "2000-09-25T22:33:41Z")
It contents me so, to have made a beneficial contribution to this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Primaflora](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Primaflora](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Primaflora)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/33 "2000-09-25T22:44:22Z")
OK 🙂 But geez I was really looking forward to having evidence provided that the Pontiff pulls his pudding on a regular basis and/or approves of that activity ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/34 "2000-09-25T22:47:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gomez \* > \*\*I agree! Lets put this one to bed, shall we? > \*\* Just don’t put it to bed with the Pope. ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/35 "2000-09-25T22:59:38Z")
Haha. Eutychus, you rock. Anyone ever tell you that? ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2000, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/36 "2000-09-26T00:56:26Z")
but I am, at your Buddha joke, **Eutychus55**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2000, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/37 "2000-09-26T01:28:02Z")
Good. I for one, don’t want to think about an 80 some year old man wanking. I don’t care WHO he is! ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2000, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/38 "2000-09-26T01:32:48Z")
Well jeez, Guinastasia, you put the thought of Bob Hope beating it, in my head. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2000, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/39 "2000-09-26T01:40:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Freyr \* > **Then Roman Catholics ought to pick a better leader instead of someone who’s hostile to other people and faiths that are simply different than his own.** Last I checked, the popr was elected by cardinals. It’s not like any of us who are not priests have any say in the matter. We don’t exactly receive ballots from God and then decide which cardinal we want to elect. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Freyr \* > **If the Pope is making OFFICIAL commentary this is derisive of other people and other faiths, that gives me the right to be openly derisive of him.** Sure. Just don’t expect those who believe he is right to be all chummy when you start cracking jokes about him. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Freyr \* > \*\*Like I said, respect is a two-way street; if you want some, you gotta give some. \*\* This is not always the case. In the army, for example (from what I know), cadets are given next to no respect. They have to bend over backwards for everyone else, in which case the fact that their backs don’t bend perfectly gets them yelled at. Not a lot of respect they get, but a lot they give. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2000, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384/40 "2000-09-26T02:12:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\*This is not always the case. In the army, for example (from what I know), cadets are given next to no respect. They have to bend over backwards for everyone else, in which case the fact that their backs don’t bend perfectly gets them yelled at. Not a lot of respect they get, but a lot they give. \*\* Been there. It’s not always (or even often) respect. Fear and loathing, maybe. Cadets, trainees, whatever, are required to yield _courtesy_ and demonstrate proper military etiquette. Respect is, indeed, earned. Someone may be granted a commission which requires that subordinates salute him/her, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re respected. Now, that response is about as far as you can get from JP II wanking. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-pope-masturbation-thread/34384.md?page=1)