# The Possesion of George W. Bush **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 29, 2007, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871 "2007-05-29T04:43:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/21 "2007-05-29T13:35:02Z")
Or submerge my head in Laura for twenty minutes. I like Laura a lot really. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/22 "2007-05-29T14:37:58Z")
I’m just trying to imagine George W Bush posessed by all these people in succession. Every twenty minutes his behaviour would change dramatically. 🙂 Can we pick the time of posession? I’d like to wait until the start of a major foreign-policy speech, then start issuing _mea culpa_s. If there was enough time, I’d also call for ending support for regimes that suppress the media, use torture and disregard the Geneva Conventions. I’d announce a dramatic greening of the USA. I’d proclaim a restructuring of land-use policy to end the need for imported oil within ten years. And I’d call for bringing the troops home from Iraq. But with my luck, I’d get him at about 2AM when he’s asleep. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/23 "2007-05-29T15:04:12Z")
It would depend entirely on what is in those memories. If I found evidence of widespread corruption and memories of intentional deceit of the electorate, especially with regards to the war in Iraq, I would take action to expose that deceit. If, on the other hand, I found the President had acted according to a reasonable understanding of the briefings he had at the time, I would do something completely different. In the first case I would call in the most secretaries to take notes/recordings and the most honest/uncorruptable/ethical people on the staff(probably on a mental list of “potential whistleblowers” already) as were immediately available and spill as much damning evidence, specifically stuff which has corraborating evidence already in the record, as possible in the timeframe. I don’t really give a shit about him snapping out of my possession in the middle of a room full of shocked people because in this eventuality he deserves all the discomfort I can generate and more. In the latter case I would find his mental file, like we all keep, of stuff he intends to get around to but hasn’t because of pressures of state, and take care of some of those things. Things like ordering flowers for Laura or his mom, writing a get well card for a friend in the hospital, things he probably wouldn’t get around to otherwise and which were small enough that they either won’t get him feedback(arousing suspicion of posssession), or which he could have conceivably have done and forgotten he had done. In either event I would think usurping his autonomy was a bad thing and probably wouldn’t have taken advantage of the opportunity to possess him at all. Only an “ends justifies the means” arguement, which generally hold very little water with me, would make such a subjugation rational and only then if I were very certain the first case would be what I would find. Right now I’d put the odds of each scenario (acting in bad faith in re: invasion of Iraq, acting in good faith in re: invastion of Iraq) at about 80-20 respectively. It would have to get up to about 95-5 before I’d violate someone else’s mind. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/24 "2007-05-29T15:18:19Z")
I would run to the White House press room as fast as my bandy legs would carry me, call an impromptu press conference, and confess to every crime I knew he’d committed in his life, as well as the most repugnant (but legal) things he’d ever done. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/25 "2007-05-29T15:22:04Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] Grab a Security Service man’s gun and start shooting. [/QUOTE] You don’t think he carries? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/26 "2007-05-29T15:22:59Z")
Actually, I’d announce my intention to become the worlds very best puppeteer. ---
**Author:** ![Barrington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Barrington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barrington)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/27 "2007-05-29T15:49:30Z")
I’d organise a press conference for 20 minutes later, when he was no longer possessed. Then I’d spend those 20 minutes occupying his body while drinking heavily … 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/28 "2007-05-29T15:55:39Z")
[QUOTE=Barrington] I’d organise a press conference for 20 minutes later, when he was no longer possessed. Then I’d spend those 20 minutes occupying his body while drinking heavily … 🆒 [/QUOTE] I wonder how quickly (as President) I could lay my hands on some sodium pentothal and shoot myself up with it…hopefully just before stepping out for that press conference. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/29 "2007-05-29T17:18:48Z")
Call up the Secretary of State, the federal justices, anybody with a working phone, and try to fix as many stupid things as possible in such little time… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/30 "2007-05-29T17:27:58Z")
1. Call in the TV news crews. 2. Masturbate like a motherfuck. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/31 "2007-05-29T18:16:50Z")
[QUOTE=Mangetout] Actually, I’d announce my intention to become the worlds very best puppeteer. [/QUOTE] Well, I was going to tack a line onto the OP about “…and then you’re ejected onto the NJ Turnpike…”, but I defer to your much better response. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/32 "2007-05-29T18:34:44Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] 1. Call in the TV news crews. 2. Masturbate like a motherfuck. [/QUOTE] Why punish TV cameramen? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/33 "2007-05-29T18:45:57Z")
Do a striptease in front of the White House press corps while singing Country Joe and the Fish’s _Feel Like I’m Fixin’ to Die Rag_. For my big finish, I’d dry hump Dana Parino (God, she’s hot, but _soooooo_ evil!). ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/34 "2007-05-29T18:48:23Z")
1. Shoot Dick Cheney with a hunting rifle. 2. Sign my resignation with his blood. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/35 "2007-05-29T18:55:12Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] You don’t think he carries? [/QUOTE] I’ve seen him in the flight suit – no, he doesn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/36 "2007-05-29T19:36:20Z")
Grab Saddam’s pistol, call the media, and eat a bullet in front of the cameras in minute 19. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/37 "2007-05-29T19:43:55Z")
Send an email detailing all my backstage shenanigans to Congress. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/38 "2007-05-29T19:55:42Z")
[QUOTE=eleanorigby] Send an email detailing all my backstage shenanigans to Congress. [/QUOTE] I would amend that to emailing it to the New York Times, The LA Times, The Washington Post and Jon Stewart. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/39 "2007-05-29T20:07:00Z")
[QUOTE=ShibbOleth] 1. Shoot Dick Cheney with a hunting rifle. 2. Sign my resignation with his blood. [/QUOTE] You win!!! ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871/40 "2007-05-29T20:20:00Z")
[QUOTE=ShibbOleth] 1. Shoot Dick Cheney with a hunting rifle. 2. Sign my resignation with his blood. [/QUOTE] If I could get ahold of Cheney within 20 minutes and actually kill him I wouldn’t bother resigning. The resulting media circus and quicky impeachment hearings would be much too entertaining to miss. 😉 The one think I would not do would be to commit suicide. I would want Bush to be around to be forced to deal with the aftermath of those 20 minutes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-possesion-of-george-w-bush/405871.md?page=3)