# The Premier of the All Male Review! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2000, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531 "2000-12-28T17:03:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![andyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@andyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andyman)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/21 "2000-12-28T21:45:44Z")
[Elvis] One for the money! ::gyrates hips:: Two for the show! ::gyrates hips:: Three to get ready, now go, cat, go…(etc, etc) [/Elvis] ---
**Author:** ![bashere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@bashere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bashere)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/22 "2000-12-28T21:51:09Z")
**. I have refreshed my beverage and am patiently waiting for the next act.** Shame…I was going to offer to strip down and bring you drinks. I’m in good shape now (trying to get ready for a mayday party…long story), but I’m still a rotten dancer. Can I just wait on you hand and foot, instead? You know, the 100 post thing and all. Plus, you’ve got such a, um, promising name… ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/23 "2000-12-28T21:55:54Z")
Gee, thanks for springing for dinner and the cab fare. Next time I’ll bring my wallet. So… this is your place, eh? Niiiiice. Here, let me show you how you can hack into those pay-per-view porno shows. You just call them up, and… Oh, heck. That didn’t work. What’s your credit card num–oh, nevermind. I already have it memorized. Gee. It’s kind of hot in here. Mind if I take off my clothes? Oops! Look at that. The little German soldier is at attention. Back off, Heinrich! hahaha You, um, don’t mind if I ah, masturbate a little, do you? Ooooh yeah. YEAH! Ahhh. Jenna Jameson, I love you! That comes right out with turpentine, you know. Hey? What’s that over there? A bottle of Campari? Woohoo! Time to get FACED! (with an affectionate nod to Kaz) ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/24 "2000-12-28T21:57:24Z")
**No one** can convince me that the men of SDMB are shy and/or retiring… So what’s the deal? Let’s get something going!! I wish to be entertained!!! ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/25 "2000-12-28T22:11:24Z")
::jiggle:: ::jiggle, jiggle:: ::jiggle, jiggle, wobble:: Whoa! ::jiggle, jiggle, wobble, flail. wobble, wobble, flop, jiggle:: Help! * * * Wombat, kiosk, credenza… spasmodica! ---
**Author:** ![MissBHaven](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missbhaven/32/7170_2.png) [@MissBHaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissBHaven)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/26 "2000-12-28T22:15:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bashere \* > \*\*…Can I just wait on you hand and foot, instead? You know, the 100 post thing and all. Plus, you’ve got such a, um, promising name… > \*\* I’ll cheerfully accept your offer of servitude. I’m a great tipper but where should I put this dollar bill? ---
**Author:** ![dewt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9dc877/32.png) [@dewt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dewt)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/27 "2000-12-28T22:25:28Z")
My stuff, eh? Well lets see… I got this **belt sander** , a **circular saw** … here’s my beloved **hammer** , favorite of all my stuff… I got a bag here with a lot more stuff in it. I’m not sure what everything is called, but I’m sure it will come in useful someday… in a few years I’m going to start up a Canadian Junkyard Wars in my backyard. … er… “_Not that stuff,_” you say? … ooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… I get it. _That_ stuff… I better go check with my wife… :: trots off to get permission to act like a slut for a whole wack of women (and men) :: She says I “can do whatever I want.” I know what that means. next… ---
**Author:** ![bashere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@bashere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bashere)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/28 "2000-12-28T22:32:57Z")
Hmmm…no pockets in this outfit. You’ll just have to be creative. Where shall I set down this Long Island? Anything else while I’m here? foot rubs, back rubs; apparently we are a full service establishment. Although I should make sure FCM is okay. And what will you be having tonight? I’m sorry, we insist that all of our guests are good and liquored up… ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/29 "2000-12-28T22:35:28Z")
You’re not gonna get my sack of weed. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/30 "2000-12-28T22:38:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jester \* > \*\*\ > > \\*\* ::cheers:: We want more Jester!! We want more Jester!! Wear a British flag and i’m all yours, baby. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/31 "2000-12-28T22:41:00Z")
Strut my stuff? Why, is it falling down? I can see where it needs a little bracing here and there, but full struts? Ok… _ **Bang** _ _ **Bang** _ _ **Bang** _ _ **Whrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr** _ _ **Scrtch** _ _ **Scrtch** _ There!!! Those 1 by 2’s oughta hold those shelves up. Oh, and by and by, you _don’t_ want to see that kind of my stuff. It would break your monitor. [sub]And not in a good way, either[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Monster104](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Monster104](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monster104)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/32 "2000-12-28T22:55:53Z")
Do you have a permit for running this here male strip joint, **Miss B**? ---
**Author:** ![MissBHaven](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missbhaven/32/7170_2.png) [@MissBHaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissBHaven)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2000, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/33 "2000-12-28T23:02:36Z")
Permit? Oh yeah, sure… let me just get that for you. _(slips him a $50 under the table)_ Now, how about a little action? ---
**Author:** ![Meephead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b782af/32.png) [@Meephead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meephead)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/34 "2000-12-29T00:50:35Z")
Walks across the stage in nothing but a black felt cowboy hat. Hair almost tickling his cheeks in the rear. 😃 [sub]hides quickly behind the curtain… “can someone bring me my boots and jeans?”[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/35 "2000-12-29T01:49:03Z")
I’m with Zoggie. More Jester, please! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/36 "2000-12-29T02:07:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Meephead \* > \*\*Hair almost tickling his cheeks in the rear. \*\* For god’s sake, shave your back. Ew. ---
**Author:** ![Meephead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b782af/32.png) [@Meephead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meephead)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/37 "2000-12-29T02:47:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rysdad \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Meephead \* > > \*\*Hair almost tickling his cheeks in the rear. \*\* > > For god’s sake, shave your back. Ew. \*\* So **THAT’S** why I can’t get a date! All this time I though that the ladies I met were jealous of my long flowing tresses. ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/38 "2000-12-29T04:21:44Z")
\ My, my, it seems this here lil lady has been one _naughty, naughty girl_! Looks like I’m gonna have to take you down to the station… :eek: \ Why…errrr…hello there, officer! I didn’t think you’d be regaining conciousne…uhmmm…waking up, so soon! What? Your uniform? Why, yes, you can have it, I just need to go, and… \ Uhhhhh…try again later? Owowowowowowowow… ---
**Author:** ![evilbeth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/evilbeth/32/2268_2.png) [@evilbeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilbeth)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/39 "2000-12-29T04:35:31Z")
After the lengths that some of us women have gone to just to entertain the men of the SDMB (ahem, Patrick…), _this_ is the payback we get? I don’t quite think so. Get in here and get to showing us your stuff- **NOW!** _All_ of you! Where’s **Omni** and his shiny, white ass? Where’s **Lizard**? Where’s everyone’s favorite attention-hound, **aha**? 😉 [sub]BTW, Patrick, you are excused from this thread–I want a private show![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![andyman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@andyman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andyman)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2000, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531/40 "2000-12-29T04:39:15Z")
andyman takes the stage wearing a sock (just guess where it is!) with his bass over his shoulder. With a huge amount of distortion on his bass and voice he proceeds to do a medley of Bawitada, Higher Ground, and Dragula. ::Sneers at the crowd:: Any requests? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-premier-of-the-all-male-review/47531.md?page=3)