# The raft of Venus **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 14, 2002, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732 "2002-11-14T16:00:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/1 "2002-11-14T16:00:34Z")
Oh Prententia! My stream of consciousness moves with eyes of a lake, across the shaggy carpet of elder bug madness on the outside walls of mind, sunning against the long winter. Squish! An M&M! The sallow coffee poop of midmorning angst decries the vile hypocrisy of madness extreme. Is this not the workday? Dare I type? Who am I? He who dares type. He who knows that to type is to die, yet who dares type on, **AM I!** Or not? (Take it) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/2 "2002-11-14T16:14:56Z")
“Take it”? Take it where? 😕 😕 😕 :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Billy\_Rubin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billy_rubin/32/3622_2.png) [@Billy\_Rubin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billy_Rubin)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/3 "2002-11-14T16:19:42Z")
Don’t bogart it, dude! ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/4 "2002-11-14T16:24:11Z")
Thou Cockleshell unbleleivers of pure prosaic thought, begone from the thread I weave, type thy stream of consciousness or leave. Cockles and muscles alive alive Oh. I appeal not to you men, I desire a ho. You are the diet coke of life. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/5 "2002-11-14T16:47:49Z")
And as the clock, cold and mechanical, continues its rythmic and relentless march towards five, i sit and contemplate. Before mine eye the ruby hand of time shudders slowly round the numbered face and each movement - though only a second in length - seems to me to take an eternity. For it seems that one single shift of that fateful hand could encompass hours sufficient for Rome to rise and fall, for kings to claim their kingdoms and lose them in flames or for love to grow strong then whither and die. Time passes. Eternity after Eternity after Eternity. TIC, TOC, TIC, TOC, TIC TOC. Hope now grows in my heart, but not the hope of a young man - looking forward with baited breath to a future where the grass will surely be greener. No. Mine is the hope of the old, of the lost, of the dying. For i hope only for an end. And my end will come at five. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/6 "2002-11-14T16:54:02Z")
Who will correct the racial inequities if you make a mistake with white out? Shake well before use baby! (shake well baby) Twist and shout! (twist and shout) C’mon c’mon Baby! (c’mon baby) wipe the white out. And yet if you write again before it is dry it is worse than before. Quoth the stapler. “Nevermore.” ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/7 "2002-11-14T17:06:46Z")
Dust bunnies Behind the monitor Skulking Waiting To dust or not to dust Not Not ---
**Author:** ![Billy\_Rubin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billy_rubin/32/3622_2.png) [@Billy\_Rubin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billy_Rubin)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/8 "2002-11-14T17:11:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scylla \* > **Or not?** Not. ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/9 "2002-11-14T17:15:24Z")
Tick and tock Tock and tick Oh for an orifice in which I could stick This finger of mine, so frail and petite If only my boogers Tasted as sweet ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/10 "2002-11-14T17:15:36Z")
Life is but a train ride - and i am the passenger who has no ticket. Tis why i fear those who would inspect me… ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/11 "2002-11-14T17:16:26Z")
Aching of arm, mine fingers in cramps The mouse is my friend, yet it bites It bites When keys are not clicking, when keyboard is silent When coffee mug sits, no longer inviting The warmth As it has grown cold Grown cold The wrist it is mindful Of all time its in use It cries out in pinching reminders Abuse For on the mouse my hand sits Disabled it becomes Wrenching more day by day As my friend the mouse bites It bites. ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/12 "2002-11-14T17:23:35Z")
Pinching and squinching And sowing his oats The trolling Ken doll glares and he gloats: “Oh I have had many, oh many have I had… Only moving thing not bedded might be your Dad. But then again, Bernie… That name sounds familiar. Wait a minute. Bernie Devillier? We met once in Rio He was a nice chap I let him twiddle my toes while I took a short nap.” ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/13 "2002-11-14T17:30:22Z")
I wish I could contribute but I left my stream of consciousness in the pub urinal. ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/14 "2002-11-14T18:20:15Z")
Your mother arglebargles in my closet like a Huegenin’s Juggernaut, reminds me of tight white panties on the Nostromo. Sigourney Weaver, still pretty she is. Now backwards talking, like Yoda. Your mom again. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/15 "2002-11-14T18:32:03Z")
“Heh and double heh.” Said the Ryder to the chai “I’d rather have my caffeine in a needle in my thigh. If you see me coming down the street Just look the other way Because meat is cheap, retains the heat And makes me feel okay.” ---
**Author:** ![eunoia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eunoia/32/97_2.png) [@eunoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eunoia)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/16 "2002-11-14T18:47:42Z")
perma-smile, permafrost a drab beige tape dispenser a smile frozen in place compulsory figure (“Owww!”, says PeeWee) viewing the swirling leaves through the frames from slightly different angles of 9-ball we office drones smoking cigar jackets we petrified bones of ice-crystal marble all see as one copper-skinned Cyclops and unhinge squeak squeak squeak the wise one grabs the shredder bin I peg him with hi-liters once again jejeune ennui sets in ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/17 "2002-11-14T18:49:39Z")
There was a young girl From Nantucket… ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/18 "2002-11-14T19:30:26Z")
Another one is leaving. I had to kick in $3 for a gift. I don’t mind contributing, but I hate being told how much, and I only had $4 left in my wallet. Whatever. No one wants to be here any more. Neither do I. Time to win the lottery, I think. push pins push pins push pins ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/19 "2002-11-14T19:48:44Z")
Here I sit, brokenhearted… Well, no, that won’t quite work, will it. How about some haiku? Stupid project hell There is no escape for me Management is dumb. ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2002, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-raft-of-venus/136732/20 "2002-11-14T21:13:04Z")
Squirrely, squirrely are you a girly? If you’re a boy I’ll buy you dinner. If we are same call me a sinner You make me feel all twirly inside Like when I was a kid and spun around So much I fell upon the ground And gazed upon the endless sky Where what when how who and why