# The rants go Marching one by one (Monthly Mini-Rants) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 1, 2022, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268 "2022-03-01T06:31:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/1 "2022-03-01T06:31:22Z")
Continuing the discussion from [February Mini-Rants. Look on the bright side - it's the shortest month of the year](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/february-mini-rants-look-on-the-bright-side-its-the-shortest-month-of-the-year/958742): The world might be on the brink of war, with the threat of nuclear weapons. The pandemic is still in effect; though winding down I wonder if we’ll see yet another surge and/or more dangerous variant as we ease off of restrictions. Inflation is rampant, and the LA Rams are the NFL champions. March Madness indeed! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/2 "2022-03-01T15:11:06Z")
Another great title… too bad you can’t monetize this ability of yours! Sorry, got nothing to rant about. It was over freezing yesterday so I got to bike, then won big at the neighborhood poker-and-whisky shindig (first in-person in two years), and we’ve got no sick cats (if you do, start a separate “Pets” thread, please… I can’t take the descriptions of symptoms. Hurts too much). ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/3 "2022-03-01T15:15:55Z")
It’s the first day of (meteorological) spring! Do a happy dance! ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/4 "2022-03-01T20:00:15Z")
Why the FUCK are Asian places closed on Tuesdays? That’s a typical day off for me (cuz I gotta cover for everyone on weekends) so Tues. is a good day for me to go, “Yanno what … ? Oh. Wait. Nevermind.” Local sushi place has lost SO much Tuesday business offa me. WHY? WHY YOU MUST CLOSE ON TUESDAY? I swear Thursday isn’t an “i wanna sushi” day. Always Tuesday. Always when they’re closed. ---
**Author:** ![BippityBoppityBoo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bippityboppityboo/32/5745_2.png) [@BippityBoppityBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BippityBoppityBoo)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/5 "2022-03-01T20:20:36Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Why the FUCK are Asian places closed on Tuesdays? Where I live it’s Monday for those closings. Several times I’ve rolled up to the door only to see the ‘closed’ sign. Nope, no Ming’s for me today. If desperate I sublimate with lesser food from adequate-but-not-stellar other Chinese places. ---
**Author:** ![Mk\_VII](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Mk\_VII](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mk_VII)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/6 "2022-03-01T20:35:49Z")
Some of them figure, ‘everybody who works Saturdays closes on Monday, we’ll go Tuesday’. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/7 "2022-03-01T22:48:28Z")
And why are SO MANY Caucasian restaurants closed on Mondays? I have a friend who always asks “Hey, I’m heading to _Curly Joe’s_ at noon, can you join me?” And I always get there and text back "Joe’s closed Mondays, I’ll check _Shemp’s Golf-Cart-Sized Pierogis…_ Then “Closed Mondays. What about… oops, also closed.” And he’ll text back “Forget it.” And I won’t hear from him til the next Monday. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2022, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/8 "2022-03-01T23:31:36Z")
Amazon. I ordered Squeakee the electronic balloon dog. I went with free delivery. They told me my new pet would be delivered on Friday. This morning, I got a message that he would be delivered today. Then, I get a message that he has been delivered. I checked the vestibule. There are no Amazon packages. When I got off work, I walked through the parking lot looking in other vestibules thinking my box had been delivered to the wrong hallway or the wrong building. I was right. I took my package from the vestibule of a different building. Now, I worry that neighbors saw me and think I stole somebody else’s package. I cannot complain about Squeakee though. This toy is wonderful! ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/9 "2022-03-02T01:19:47Z")
> [@BippityBoppityBoo](#): > > Where I live it’s Monday for those closings. Same. My barber shop is run by two awesome Asian folks (best haircuts I’ve ever had) but they close on Sunday and Monday. Luckily I have every Wednesday off, and that’s usually when I go in. I can generally walk in, get seated immediately, and leave in 20 minutes or so. And they don’t charge much either. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/10 "2022-03-02T03:27:33Z")
Beyond pissed. I went to the lunchroom twenty minutes ago, and found that some misbegotten fuckface had stolen my lunch. Time to clock back in! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/11 "2022-03-02T04:55:07Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Beyond pissed. I went to the lunchroom twenty minutes ago, and found that some misbegotten fuckface had stolen my lunch. Damn! Oh, wait, was that the lunch with the Ex-Lax brownie? We had a mystery thief taking desserts out of lunches… and it turned out to be… _the President of the company_. I know because I caught him rooting through people’s lunches one morning about 10 am. And was surprised that he didn’t react at all, just gestured at the half dozen open lunch bags in front of him with “Huh, not much here in the way of a snack. I’m starving.” I spread the word, and the coworkers spread the ExLax… we think it cured him. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/12 "2022-03-02T14:06:07Z")
Around here the typical restaurant closure day is Sunday. We went out for a special Mardi Gras dinner at a Cajun place yesterday. The food was great. It was hard not to notice that we were just about the only patrons wearing a mask entering and on the buffet line (yeah, another risk). If I wind up on a respirator, at least I’ll have had one final really good crawfish etoufee. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/13 "2022-03-02T14:57:38Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Around here the typical restaurant closure day is Sunday. We go to breweries fairly often. Most are closed Monday and Tuesday. Works out for me, as Tuesday is my day of atonement. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/14 "2022-03-02T16:54:19Z")
Since restaurants seems to be the theme, here’s mine. The best mom and pop burger joint ever is downtown where I live and they had a kitchen fire several months back and is closed indefinitely pending repairs. Fortunately they were insured and by all reports are planning to reopen. But dammit I need my triple bypass with cheese! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/15 "2022-03-02T22:23:49Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Tuesday is my day of atonement. So, you have to atone for all your sins of Friday night, Saturday, Sunday… and Monday, too? You gotta take pics for your memoirs! ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2022, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/16 "2022-03-02T22:30:11Z")
> [@digs](#): > > We had a mystery thief taking desserts out of lunches… and it turned out to be… _the President of the company_ . That reminds me of this particular Dilbert entry: [![](https://assets.amuniversal.com/f543a7d06d6201301d80001dd8b71c47) ](https://assets.amuniversal.com/f543a7d06d6201301d80001dd8b71c47) ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/17 "2022-03-03T15:12:50Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I spread the word, and the coworkers spread the ExLax… we think it cured him. No shit! Err, ummm, I mean, Golly! ---
**Author:** ![Bonum\_Legatum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bonum_legatum/32/6183_2.png) [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/18 "2022-03-03T19:12:44Z")
There was a tropical fish store here that was always closed on Mondays. We figured the owner had contracts to set up and maintain aquariums in dentists’ offices and the like - and Monday was his day to go around and do any maintenance on them. Now the truth is out - it was the store owner’s day to be out and **not** go to restaurants. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/19 "2022-03-03T20:17:08Z")
I’ve been having trouble with my kitchen sink on and off for a while now. It is now completely blocked up. I turned on the garbage disposal to clear it. I get a kind of humming noise, but the disposal doesn’t work. I hate having maintenance in my apartment. It makes me nervous for many reasosns. I bit the bullet and called the management office to send maintenance. That was over 3 hours ago. I realized I’d been making the assumption that once I called, maintenance would come quickly. It could be days. Oh goody. Minor-minor rant- I now chase down and consolidate fraud leads for investigators. I ran out of tips very shortly after starting work today. My team lead keeps telling us to sit tight. I thought being paid to sit around in my apartment and not work would be very pleasant. I was so wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2022, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268/20 "2022-03-03T21:03:57Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I get a kind of humming noise, but the disposal doesn’t work. Check around the disposal (under the sink) and see if there is a pouch on it with an Allen key (or you may have some Allen keys in your toolbox). If you can find the Allen key, there is a slot on the button of the disposal where it will fit (if from your toolbox, the size needs to match). Spin it back and forth to see if you can loosen up what has it bound up. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-rants-go-marching-one-by-one-monthly-mini-rants/960268.md?page=2)