# The real pimp is here **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 2, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638 "2003-05-02T15:04:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/1 "2003-05-02T15:04:59Z")
ok now this is me a real straight up pimp i pimp old young mid age any age i can pimp any female in the word come and test me ---
**Author:** ![carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/2 "2003-05-02T15:08:06Z")
Is this an “Ask the pimp” thread? ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/3 "2003-05-02T15:13:19Z")
A Minny pimp? ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/4 "2003-05-02T15:14:34Z")
And the winner of the “\*I didn’t bother to read any of the forum descriptions is…[.i]” ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/5 "2003-05-02T15:19:12Z")
Dear Straight Dope. My pimp is broken. He only speaks in lower case. Can I return my pimp for a newer pimp that can spell? The ho’s are getting restless. Please write back soon. –Slortar ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/6 "2003-05-02T15:21:12Z")
Hey pimp, the goldfish in your heels are dead. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/7 "2003-05-02T15:25:01Z")
Everyone knows all the biggest Pimp Daddys are from Minnesota! Is it true Minnesota pimps sometimes have trouble finding 12 inch snow tires for their low riders? Is it true Minnesota ho’s smell like lutefisk down there? Is is true that Lutheran’s will cap your punk ass in a Minneapolis minute for even looking at them crossways? So many questions for the Minnesota pimp daddy. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/8 "2003-05-02T15:26:24Z")
Oh, this is gonna be fun. ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/9 "2003-05-02T15:28:01Z")
Been playin’ “Pimp Wars”, have we? ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/10 "2003-05-02T15:28:26Z")
Do we have pimp/harlot/gigolo forum? Another mark against Dopers whose name ends in a number… ---
**Author:** ![Wyld\_Stallyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8dc957/32.png) [@Wyld\_Stallyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyld_Stallyn)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/11 "2003-05-02T15:47:38Z")
> [@](#): > > Do we have pimp/harlot/gigolo forum? More importantly, do we have a “How Does One _Become_ a Gigolo?” forum? After considering the lifestyle of being paid to go on dates and then fuck hot professional women, this young buck is all ready to sign up!! ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/12 "2003-05-02T15:52:28Z")
How in the hell do you test a pimp? ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/13 "2003-05-02T15:53:25Z")
Somewhere in Minnesota, a scrawny, 15 year old white kid is thinking he is the coolest board poster ever by using an online persona that consists entirely of outdated slang, poorly constructed language, and incomprehensible idiocy. Congratulations, dear sir, for managing to compose a post that a thousand monkeys on a thousand typewrites working for a thousand years wouldn’t have used to clean up the feces smeared walls from the previous evenings office party/mating ritual. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/14 "2003-05-02T15:54:47Z")
[quote] How in the hell do you test a pimp? [quote] 30% talent, 30% interview, 20% swimwear and 20% evening gown. ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/15 "2003-05-02T15:57:09Z")
> [@](#): > > How in the hell do you test a pimp? Ask him if he knows what animal gives us naugahyde? ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/16 "2003-05-02T16:00:05Z")
Isn’t a young pimp called a pimple? ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/17 "2003-05-02T16:03:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*How in the hell do you test a pimp? \*\* MMPI – Minnesota Multiho Pimp Inventory ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/18 "2003-05-02T16:05:46Z")
Well it’s about time! ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/19 "2003-05-02T16:24:35Z")
That was fast. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638/20 "2003-05-02T16:28:19Z")
> [@](#): > > How do you test a pimp? Hopefully, he does better on the math section than he did on the verbal, but I’m not holding my breath. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-pimp-is-here/172638.md?page=2)