# The \*REAL\* start of the year! September mini-rants

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [September 1, 2011, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847 "2011-09-01T15:24:32Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 18

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**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/341 "2011-09-14T00:39:19Z")

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> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#):
>
> So what drug are you on that makes you illiterate? May I have some?

😕

You went back four days to include this in a post that is already far too long, just to show you don’t know the difference between “typo” and “illiterate”? Not to mention the difference between “the affects of narcotics on the ability to type” and “illiterate”…

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**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/342 "2011-09-14T02:29:00Z")

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> [@Chefguy](#):
>
> We have a “No Solicitors” sign in plain view, stuck to the mailbox next to the front door. Most people respect it; some don’t, to whom I’m usually less than polite. Today I see a young woman coming up the walk with a clipboard and think: ‘she’ll see the sign and turn around’. Nope. Knocky-knockie.
> 
> My wife answers and the girl starts in with a stupid question that she cleverly thought up about the pepper plant in the front yard, and that she is sure will make you want to be her BFF and buy whatever useless shit she is selling. Wifey mutters something unintelligible, and the woman launches into her spiel about Century-Link cable.
> 
> Wifey interrupts her, says ‘not interested’ and points out the sign. The woman says “oh, I’m not a solicitor; I’m just representing Century Link”. :rolleyes:

Any chance she had a Brit accent?

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**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/343 "2011-09-14T03:25:56Z")

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I don’t know if it’s legal or not in Oregon to ask someone to register for a particular party, I don’t think it is because then you couldn’t have the republican party booth with registration forms and such at county fairs. But for him to tell me that he only got paid for people who registered as republicans, that may be illegal for whoever is employing him or whatever… If he had a big republican hat on with elephant ears and asked me to register for the republican party I would have told him that I was happily independent, but would re-register with my new address if he wanted me to… but yeah, that isn’t what happened.

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**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/344 "2011-09-14T03:27:26Z")

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> [@Chefguy](#):
>
> We have a “No Solicitors” sign in plain view, stuck to the mailbox next to the front door. Most people respect it; some don’t, to whom I’m usually less than polite. Today I see a young woman coming up the walk with a clipboard and think: ‘she’ll see the sign and turn around’. Nope. Knocky-knockie.
> 
> My wife answers and the girl starts in with a stupid question that she cleverly thought up about the pepper plant in the front yard, and that she is sure will make you want to be her BFF and buy whatever useless shit she is selling. Wifey mutters something unintelligible, and the woman launches into her spiel about Century-Link cable.
> 
> Wifey interrupts her, says ‘not interested’ and points out the sign. The woman says “oh, I’m not a solicitor; I’m just representing Century Link”. :rolleyes:

Lol! “I’m not brainless, I just don’t have a clue what the fuck I’m doing!”

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**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/345 "2011-09-14T04:46:20Z")

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I just want to say that **Morgyn** is the most evil person ever. If I could wash the images out of my head (or figure out how to do multi quotes), I would direct you to the right place.

Shakes fist at **Morgyn**. When I come back, I will have links and such. _Everyone_ will hate you!!!

Cliffnotes happen. **Morgyn** suggested breeding between SG and CNL. Music was provided. If anyone notices that I’m not posting anymore, its because I haven’t managed to crawl out from my closet long enough to toss myself head first into the shredder.

Promises to make a messy end of it. It will be my contribution to the internet lore 🙂

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/346 "2011-09-14T06:56:48Z")

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> [@drewtwo99](#):
>
> Can I rant about something that happend to me a few years ago, but about which I have never ranted?
> 
> When I was in my 2nd year of college, I was walking along campus and someone wanted me to register to vote. I did need to re-register with my new address, so I said sure and was happily filling out the form. When he noticed that I checked the “unaffiliated” box, he got upset and had the nerve to ask me if I would register as a republican, because he only got paid for people who registered as republicans. I just about wanted to punch this poor sap in the face, not because he was a republican trying to register other republicans, but because he thought I would care about him getting paid, and for purportedly only caring about getting people registered to vote, period. I still regret not chewing this guy out when I had the chance, but I can still see his weasely face even though we only met that one day so many years ago.

Back when I lived in Miami, I kept getting asked to register. Shouldn’t they ask whether you’re eligible to vote, first?

These last few weeks, one of the small Spanish parties has set up some tables near my workplace and they’re asking for sigs: they need a minimal amount of sigs per demarcation to be able to run. The first day, one asked for my sig, I explained that I would gladly give it (for the principle of the thing, I think it’s good to have many different choices available) but I’m from a different demarcation; she gave me the contact info for their people there “in case you happen to be passing by and want to drop in to leave your sig”. The other two times I’ve seen them, I’ve gone on my way saying “not from here, sorry” and gotten yelled at :mad: Hey, you bloody moron, my sig on those pages you’re holding would be _invalid_! Get enough sigs invalidated, you can’t run, duh.

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**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/347 "2011-09-14T16:46:19Z")

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> [@flatlined](#):
>
> I just want to say that **Morgyn** is the most evil person ever. If I could wash the images out of my head (or figure out how to do multi quotes), I would direct you to the right place.

I think multi-quotes only work within a thread.

Yay, I’m evil!!

> [@flatlined](#):
>
> Shakes fist at **Morgyn**. When I come back, I will have links and such. _Everyone_ will hate you!!!

They will love me, because I have finally become evil. Evil, I tell you! [basks]

> [@flatlined](#):
>
> Cliffnotes happen. **Morgyn** suggested breeding between SG and CNL. Music was provided. If anyone notices that I’m not posting anymore, its because I haven’t managed to crawl out from my closet long enough to toss myself head first into the shredder.

No, no. I did not suggest breeding, as such. I mean, the idea of SG and CNL spawning is just a bit too evil, even for my newly discovered evilness.

[I only suggested sex.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=14252178&postcount=93)

> [@flatlined](#):
>
> Promises to make a messy end of it. It will be my contribution to the internet lore 🙂

This only works if you go feet first so you can write about it as it happens. Or dictate it.

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**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/348 "2011-09-14T18:15:53Z")

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> [@Nava](#):
>
> Back when I lived in Miami, I kept getting asked to register. Shouldn’t they ask whether you’re eligible to vote, first?
> 
> These last few weeks, one of the small Spanish parties has set up some tables near my workplace and they’re asking for sigs: they need a minimal amount of sigs per demarcation to be able to run. The first day, one asked for my sig, I explained that I would gladly give it (for the principle of the thing, I think it’s good to have many different choices available) but I’m from a different demarcation; she gave me the contact info for their people there “in case you happen to be passing by and want to drop in to leave your sig”. The other two times I’ve seen them, I’ve gone on my way saying “not from here, sorry” and gotten yelled at :mad: Hey, you bloody moron, my sig on those pages you’re holding would be _invalid_! Get enough sigs invalidated, you can’t run, duh.

LOL! What the hell is wrong with people? They are dumb for yelling at you, even on assumption that they believed you were lying to them so you could go on your way. Yelling at someone is not a good way to get them to do what you want, especially when you have no power over them, and no reason for you to listen to them. Considering the fact that you were trying to do them a favor by not putting down an invalid signature, I would go back there and happily sign it, maybe multiple times under multiple names if they didn’t recognize me, just to spite them. Of course, that’s probably illegal on your part if you were to do it, so… I don’t know. Maybe just spit at their feet instead.

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**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/349 "2011-09-14T18:25:27Z")

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> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#):
>
> What the fuck, how is that remotely professional? You’re the customer. The customer shouldn’t be asked to give the employee a dressing-down: that’s what the employee’s fucking manager is for. Unless the manager is _terrible_, which this one apparently is.

Yeah, I wasn’t terribly happy with it, either. Though the whole situation worked out well. Before we walked in, I talked to my husband so we’d have a united approach. We decided that we’d just start the conversation out with, “Hey, we’ve never met you before and would like to understand what your policies are more. By the way, it seemed like you were getting a little irritated with our kid Friday - what gives?” That approach seemed to work well and I was satisfied with the discussion, though there’s no way in hell I’d like to repeat it.

What ticked me off more was that I mentioned the issue in an offhand way to a co-worker, who told me that the whole incident was probably my son’s fault. Nice. I was standing there and saw the whole thing with my own eyes. Generally, I don’t have precious little snowflake syndrome. My kid, like all kids, is annoying as hell sometimes. But if someone is screaming at my kid, I’d at least like to know why and if it’s common for that person to feel that screaming is necessary so I can a) support them in getting my son to listen better and b) understand if this is standard behavior within the aftercare because getting yelled at makes my son’s behavior worse, not better.

Another mini-rant: My daughter has woken me up somewhere between 1 and 3 every night for the last four nights. She has a stuffy nose. I won’t begrudge her last night - it stormed loudly pretty much all night. But I’m tired of sleeping with her feet digging into my back and the Darth Vader-like sound of her breathing that’s somehow louder than my husband’s snoring. I think it’s time to buy that velcro suit and bed sheet.

Yet another mini-rant: I came up with a new process for work and presented it to the biatches. One hated it. The other absolutely loved it. And came over to compliment my co-workers on it. Even though I created it. Goddamn it, can’t you say one nice thing to me? Ugh, how I hate them.

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**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/350 "2011-09-14T18:31:40Z")

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> [@overlyverbose](#):
>
> Yeah, I wasn’t terribly happy with it, either. Though the whole situation worked out well. Before we walked in, I talked to my husband so we’d have a united approach. We decided that we’d just start the conversation out with, “Hey, we’ve never met you before and would like to understand what your policies are more. By the way, it seemed like you were getting a little irritated with our kid Friday - what gives?” That approach seemed to work well and I was satisfied with the discussion, though there’s no way in hell I’d like to repeat it.
> 
> What ticked me off more was that I mentioned the issue in an offhand way to a co-worker, who told me that the whole incident was probably my son’s fault. Nice. I was standing there and saw the whole thing with my own eyes. Generally, I don’t have precious little snowflake syndrome. My kid, like all kids, is annoying as hell sometimes. But if someone is screaming at my kid, I’d at least like to know why and if it’s common for that person to feel that screaming is necessary so I can a) support them in getting my son to listen better and b) understand if this is standard behavior within the aftercare because getting yelled at makes my son’s behavior worse, not better.
> 
> Another mini-rant: My daughter has woken me up somewhere between 1 and 3 every night for the last four nights. She has a stuffy nose. I won’t begrudge her last night - it stormed loudly pretty much all night. But I’m tired of sleeping with her feet digging into my back and the Darth Vader-like sound of her breathing that’s somehow louder than my husband’s snoring. I think it’s time to buy that velcro suit and bed sheet.
> 
> Yet another mini-rant: I came up with a new process for work and presented it to the biatches. One hated it. The other absolutely loved it. And came over to compliment my co-workers on it. Even though I created it. Goddamn it, can’t you say one nice thing to me? Ugh, how I hate them.

The co-worker passing judgment on your kid is completely rude and disrespectful. If they really wanted to constructively criticized your parenting, they could have done so in a more appropriate way, and appropriate setting. If a somehow analogous story about a friend of yours recieved the same blunt criticism, you’d have every reason to be just as upset. It has nothing to do with you suffering from precious little snowflake syndrome, and everything to do with your coworker being a bitchy asshole.

My parents always kept their doors locked at night… probably for more than one reason. I don’t have kids, but I think this sounds like a pretty good idea, and it kept my sister and I from bothering them at night.

Your coworkers seem like awful, awful people. Sorry you have to deal with them ☹

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**Author:** ![the\_Lady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bb73d2/32.png) [@the\_Lady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Lady)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/351 "2011-09-14T18:55:10Z")

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> [@Sierra\_Indigo](#):
>
> Migraine on Sunday. Started off with weird distortion in words, unable to read things in front of me. Progressed through to the entirity of my left field of vision filled with strobing, flashy goodness and peripheral vision completely shot.
> 
> Painkillers, hot shower, hot tea, bed. Slept for most of the afternoon. Woke up at 2030, too restless to go back to sleep, up until after midnight.
> 
> Sleep through alarm next morning. Wake up feeling pukey. Call work, back to bed. Get up again at 10-ish, spend entire day feeling headachy and body achy and generally lousy.
> 
> Bed at 2300. Up when alarm goes off at 0545. Entire day unable to focus or concentrate. Head doesn’t hurt, but who the fuck am I? What am I supposed to be doing? What did I walk in here for?
> 
> The next time someone trills “Oh I have a migraine” and puts a hand to their forehead before going back to work, I’m going to punch them in the carotid artery. Three days I’ve been unable to operate at full capacity. Three. Fucking. Days.

Yep. Last week in a nutshell. Thursday morning, sitting at my desk thinking “huh. I can’t see” Trying to decide if I should attempt to drive home before the pain became incapacitating. Fortunately for me, it never did. Just a really, really sucky three days.

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/352 "2011-09-14T19:16:09Z")

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I get bad headaches, but after reading peoples’ descriptions of migraines here, I never call them migraines - they’re just bad headaches.

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**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/353 "2011-09-14T19:51:39Z")

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> [@drewtwo99](#):
>
> My parents always kept their doors locked at night… probably for more than one reason. I don’t have kids, but I think this sounds like a pretty good idea, and it kept my sister and I from bothering them at night.

Our door isn’t locked but both our kids know that they are not allowed to sleep in our bed. If they are scared, we are more than happy to get up and give extra hugs/get a glass of water/just be there for them but sleepy time means in your own bed.

My rant: I have spent two months trying to discover where the urine smell was coming from in our bathroom. I have washed everything inside and out and taken apart what I can without doing something that might require a builder or plumber. Every couple of weeks the smell would mysteriously go away for a few hours.

Turns out, the smell went away everytime we washed the tub. You see, my son has been peeing in the bathtub (not during a shower when there is water running but in the empty tub leaving it to sit). I mean, I know he’s a boy and that it’s fun to pee but really, really?

(It could have been worse, though, I was \<this close\> to tearing the whole thing out.)

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**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/354 "2011-09-14T21:50:28Z")

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And it won’t go away!!

Ahem:  
_Unicorns, I love them  
Unicorns, I love them  
Unicorns, I love them  
Unicooorns…  
I loove them!_

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**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/355 "2011-09-14T22:44:00Z")

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> [@perfectparanoia](#):
>
> You see, my son has been peeing in the bathtub (not during a shower when there is water running but in the empty tub leaving it to sit). I mean, I know he’s a boy and that it’s fun to pee but really, really?

It may be a bit on the cruel side, but next time he says he has to go to the bathroom (and no one else is around because that would be over the top cruel), suggest he just pee his pants and then rub it on his face.

When he goes :eek:

say “well, that’s pretty much what you’re doing when you pee in your own bath water.”

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**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\
**Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/356 "2011-09-14T23:16:38Z")

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> [@Chimera](#):
>
> It may be a bit on the cruel side, but next time he says he has to go to the bathroom (and no one else is around because that would be over the top cruel), suggest he just pee his pants and then rub it on his face.
> 
> When he goes :eek:
> 
> say “well, that’s pretty much what you’re doing when you pee in your own bath water.”

I understood it that he WASN’T peeing in his bathwater, but in the empty tub, and then not even rinsing it out after.

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**Author:** ![Tess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@Tess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tess)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/357 "2011-09-15T00:06:53Z")

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> [@Nava](#):
>
> , I’ve gone on my way saying “not from here, sorry” and gotten yelled at :mad: Hey, you bloody moron, my sig on those pages you’re holding would be _invalid_! Get enough sigs invalidated, you can’t run, duh.

You’re a much nicer person than I am. I would have been tempted to coo, “I didn’t realize it meant _so_ much to you. Of course I’ll sign!”

Then I’d make my signature extra small so I could add in “They knew I was invalid when I signed this.”

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**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/358 "2011-09-15T00:14:24Z")

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> [@jayjay](#):
>
> I understood it that he WASN’T peeing in his bathwater, but in the empty tub, and then not even rinsing it out after.

Ah, right. Further proof that I’m not over this mold induced illness.

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**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/359 "2011-09-15T04:20:25Z")

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> [@perfectparanoia](#):
>
> My rant: I have spent two months trying to discover where the urine smell was coming from in our bathroom. I have washed everything inside and out and taken apart what I can without doing something that might require a builder or plumber. Every couple of weeks the smell would mysteriously go away for a few hours.
> 
> Turns out, the smell went away everytime we washed the tub. You see, my son has been peeing in the bathtub (not during a shower when there is water running but in the empty tub leaving it to sit). I mean, I know he’s a boy and that it’s fun to pee but really, really?
> 
> (It could have been worse, though, I was \<this close\> to tearing the whole thing out.)

When my son was about 4-5 years old, our bathroom started having a real bad urine smell. We scrubbed the floors, cleaned around the toilet, washed the tub, everything we could think of, but the smell persisted.

One day my wife heard noise and giggling coming from the bathroom, so she opened to door to find our son and a couple of his buddies standing in the bathtub having a contest to see who could pee the highest on the wall! :eek:

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**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\
**Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-real-start-of-the-year-september-mini-rants/594847/360 "2011-09-15T05:03:07Z")

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> [@Morgyn](#):
>
> I think multi-quotes only work within a thread.

Thumbs through the rule book, I’m sure there is something here that says you aren’t allowed to be helpful while being accused of being _ **evil!** _ 😃

SG left work early, he said he had a doctor appointment. When I got home, I noticed that CNL’s blinds were closed and she didn’t come out to glare at me. As soon as I got my helmet off I poured bleach in my ear, hoping it would reach my brain.

sobs…I used to just lurve Alice.

My mini rant…I was riding home and saw a mini storm on the highway. I could see the other side of the storm. I have 2 choices, stop and put my rainsuit on, or just power through it. I could see the other side, it was bright and sunny and only a block away.

I was soaked to the skin and blinded before I got out of it. I won’t be able to ride to work in the morning because the pounding rain found my helmet vents and the padding is wet.

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