# The Retail Kiss of Death **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 10, 2003, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501 "2003-11-10T22:55:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/81 "2003-11-13T11:25:15Z")
I’ve never heard anybody say anything BUT “water fountain.” I guess I’d know what you meant if you called it a “drinking fountain,” but nobody I know has ever called it that. Weird, these regional quirks. You have a point, **Bosda.** I guess my point was more that a business has the right not to make every customer happy. Sure, they’ll suffer for it if they make a habit of it, but it’s no more a customer’s “right” to get good service than it is their obligation to buy. And sometimes, with certain customers, you cut your losses…which is all I really meant to say. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/82 "2003-11-13T12:39:32Z")
A but north of me, some people call it a ‘bubbler’. ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/83 "2003-11-13T12:51:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Audrey Levins \* > \*\*I’ve never heard anybody say anything BUT “water fountain.” > > I guess I’d know what you meant if you called it a “drinking fountain,” but nobody I know has ever called it that. > > Weird, these regional quirks. \*\* Yes, indeed, these regional quirks. A drinking fountain is what you drink out of, a water fountain is a large fountain in the park that you throw pennies in when you make a wish. A “bubbler” (to me at least) is an old-fashioned term for drinking fountain, kind of like using “icebox” for refrigerator. I didn’t realize people still used that word. I guess the two terms are pretty interchangeable, but if someone said they were going to get a drink out of the water fountain, I’d do a double take. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/84 "2003-11-13T14:38:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by E-Sabbath \* > \*\*A but north of me, some people call it a ‘bubbler’. \*\* Yikes. I’d stay away from any but, north or south of me, called a bubbler. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/85 "2003-11-13T14:47:24Z")
The traditional Wisconsin term is “bubbler” (even though they don’t actually bubble anymore). I’ve heard it attributed to other areas too (Maryland?). My point about “you guys” is not that there’s anything grammatically wrong with it, but that it should be reserved for casual use. I use it in conversation with my friends and family, but not with my clients. ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/86 "2003-11-13T15:57:38Z")
I went into a bar in southern Illinois that had the following sign in large letters above the cash register: “This is not Burger King. You do not get it your way. You get it my way or you don’t get the son of a bitch at all!” Fortunately, all I wanted was a draft beer, cold and in a glass. Their way was my way, but I’d be reluctant to go back there for a burger! ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/87 "2003-11-13T16:03:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rick \* > \*\* > Just as a counterpoint: > > Last night I went to dinner here in Seattle (I’m up on business) I get seated at the restaurant and in a couple of minutes the waitress comes by with a hand full of plates and four of those folders for the bill under her arm. She is clearly busy as hell. She starts to ask if I want a drink. I tell her to go take care of the other stuff, and come back with an ice tea, but really there was no rush. > About 3 minutes later, she is back and still out of breath. I tell her to take a deep breath and slow down for a second. She does and gives me a dazzling smile. We chit chat for a minute, she makes a recommendation and I order my food. A couple of times during the dinner, she stopped by to see if everything is OK. (it was) > Anyway when I get the bill back with my credit card I notice that she has written something on my receipt > With that comment she made mine. 🙂 \*\* You’ve described (except for the note) how I’ve cosen to live my life whether dining in restaurants or having the oil changed on my car. More times than not, when I pay my bill, I also get a strong handshake or a greatful smile. And I enjoy that. Nobody had to kiss my feet or rattle their servitude collars in some outdated sign of obediance. And when the bill was paid, the world was honestly a better place afterward, if only for a few minutes. I always feel good as I leave. The person who sold me the services feels good. (no gritted teeth, no ulcers, no quick trips to the gun cabinet to mow down slow moving coworkers) And I get good service. Now if somebody gets their jollies playing the Duke of Dickweed or the Duchess of Shitdontstink and treats the staff like slaves bought at a discount, then I can’t support them when they have ‘service horror stories’. Assholes attract bad service the way magnets attract iron filings and its been that way since the beginning of time. But I don’t let thoughts of them ruin my good day. ---
**Author:** ![insomnia4AM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@insomnia4AM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/insomnia4AM)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/88 "2003-11-13T16:19:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Hamadryad \* > \*\*I understand the irritation with seeing that kind of sign, most particularly considering the total and complete lack of service you were shown. BUT…I can understand that sign on a gift shop. Even if they were kidding. At places like “Things Remembered,” where they do custom engraving, I’m sure they get FAR MORE than their fair share of people waltzing up, buying ten plaques, and saying, “I need these in an hour, I’m on my way to an awards banquet,” and then being all pissed off that all ten of them might not be done in time by the one person who’s working while they have other customers to wait on - and, probably, prior engraving orders to fill. > > It probably takes a considerable amount of self-control (and desire to keep their jobs) for them to NOT say, “LOOK, ASSHOLE, IF YOU WANTED THESE ON TIME, YOU SHOULD HAVE COME IN MORE THAN AN HOUR BEFORE YOU NEEDED THEM.” \*\* AAAAHHHHH, when I was working at a Staples Copy Center, I had people rush in at 7am with a 100 page double sided report that they needed 25 copies of it, bound, with color, laminated covers. Sure, no problem. I’ll call you in 2 hours when it’s done. Oh no, they aren’t looking for 2 hours, they want 20 minutes, and they are going to wait, because it’s a very important report, and their job depends on it. And you waited until now, why? And these were the people that would stand at the register, and tell everyone that came up that I was working on a more important project, and they would have to wait. It’s a wonder I made it to the end of the 9 months I was there. ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/89 "2003-11-13T20:33:15Z")
It seems rather superficial to me that some people’s choice of business is based merely on the presence of some symbol. I’m wondering, would you not go in a convenience store that had a statue of Ganesh on the counter? Or a chinese restaurant that had Buddhist paraphanelia? ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/90 "2003-11-13T21:04:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Incubus \* > I’m wondering, would you not go in a convenience store that had a statue of Ganesh on the counter? Or a chinese restaurant that had Buddhist paraphanelia? If Ganesh was up front and on the counter, I’d certainly hesitate. But “Buddhist paraphenelia” [sic] at a Chinese restaurant? That’s practically part of the decoration! 😉 Now, Buddist figurines at a non-Chinese-specific business, such as an auto repair shop, that’d give me pause as well. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/91 "2003-11-13T21:43:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by quietman1920 \* > \*\* Nobody had to kiss my feet or rattle their servitude collars in some outdated sign of obediance. \*\* \ “I can’t hear ya, boy!” \ ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/92 "2003-11-13T21:45:23Z")
Meant to add, **quietman** - that straw man of yours is so impressive, you should truck it down to Texas A&M for the next bonfire. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/93 "2003-11-14T00:23:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scarlett67 \* > \*\*The traditional Wisconsin term is “bubbler” (even though they don’t actually bubble anymore). I’ve heard it attributed to other areas too (Maryland?). \*\*Not in this part of Maryland. I never hear the term “bubbler.” As I said in my earlier post, I though the word had gone the way of “ice box.” > [@](#): > > \*\*My point about “you guys” is not that there’s anything grammatically wrong with it, but that it should be reserved for casual use. I use it in conversation with my friends and family, but not with my clients. \*\* We do say “you guys” though. If someone says “youse guys” or “you’ins” I know they’re from western Pennsylvania. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/94 "2003-11-14T00:54:32Z")
> [@](#): > > We do say “you guys” though. If someone says “youse guys” or “you’ins” I know they’re from western Pennsylvania. If they say ‘youse guys’ they are probably from _eastern_ Pennsylvania. Here in da burgh, we say ‘yinz’ or ‘yunz’. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/95 "2003-11-14T01:01:06Z")
## quote: ## Originally posted by Scarlett67 The traditional Wisconsin term is “bubbler” (even though they don’t actually bubble anymore). I’ve heard it attributed to other areas too (Maryland?). Sorry, that was me. I spent 8 years in Maryland. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/96 "2003-11-14T02:42:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Incubus \* > \*\*It seems rather superficial to me that some people’s choice of business is based merely on the presence of some symbol. > > I’m wondering, would you not go in a convenience store that had a statue of Ganesh on the counter? Or a chinese restaurant that had Buddhist paraphanelia? \*\* Twice in my life I have been screwed on home improvement deals. Both times have been by people who had three things in common. [list=1] [li]A fish emblem on their business cards[/li][li]Told me at great length about what great Christians they were[/li][li]They fucked me on the deal.[/li][/list=1] How does that old saying go? Fuck me once shame on you, Fuck me twice shame on me, What would it be for fuck me three time? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Wikkit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c0e974/32.png) [@Wikkit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wikkit)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/97 "2003-11-14T02:56:47Z")
$80, and you have to pay for the hotel room. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/98 "2003-11-14T04:03:29Z")
😃 ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/99 "2003-11-14T06:20:49Z")
Tell ya what, next time I see a fuckin’ Pest Control place with a huge pictures of five Hindu gods and a bootlegged Calvin figure worshipping 'em, I’ll give you a call and tell you whether or not I’ve gone inside. ---
**Author:** ![psychomonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/dec6dc/32.png) [@psychomonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychomonkey)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2003, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501/100 "2003-11-14T07:22:05Z")
I’m going with Audrey on the waiter thing. Having been one myself I understand what they go through. Ive taken to basing my tip amount on the number of times they check in. Dollar base plus once for each time they come back. If it figures out to be less than 20% then the service was subpar and it’s their own goddamn problem. Adjustments are made based on time, how busy it is, and so on. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-retail-kiss-of-death/212501.md?page=6)