Okay,so what if the custom does come from pre-American times. In a society where inhabitants now number millions where once there were hundreds, whence comes the sense of entitlement that makes people think their private grief is more important than the rights of their neighbors?
It *is/i] illegal in many places, and it’s about time the law was enforced. I for one am sick of being expected to share the properly private grief of everyone who has a family tragedy. We all have them. Imagine if we all felt compelled to memorialize our lost oved ones on the spot. We’d be tripping over soggy stuffed bears everywhere we went. Enough is enough already!
I’m with you guys on this. I clean up the messes that cause the roadside memorials, and really can’t see the logic in getting out of your car and endangering your life, and the lives of everyone who passes by you just to prop up some sappy trinket or plastic religious icon. It’s silly, it’s illegal, and it’s dangerous, no matter where the custom comes from. It’s just another example of the self-centered ‘pay-attention-to-me!!’ frame of mind this country is in. Sad, really, but mostly dumb.
The problem is too many people. In sparse areas, these things happen sparsely, and when the memorials are few and far between, it’s no big deal.
In dense areas, however, you have more fatalities and thus, more memorials. So much so, that they’re done too often, too regularly. Then those who ordinarily wouldn’t do such a memorial, do it anyway because “that’s what everyone else does.” Then it gets out of hand.
States are going to have to draw the line somewhere. I’m betting when one of these memorials can be directly linked to causing another accident, the state will stop looking the other way and get anal about removing any memorial as soon as it goes up.
There are some very nice little roadsign memorials in Greece. Very tasteful little boxes that have something (I think it’s incense) inside that travellers can burn for whatever purpose. Not tacky. Weather-resistant. Nary a soggy bear to be seen.
If you want to put up a roadside memorial, how about a big flashing neon sign that says ATTENTION TEENAGERS: SLOW DOWN AND DRIVE SOBER, YOU IDIOTS!
You nicely summed up how I feel about it. In today’s paper there were stories about two fatal accidents last night that killed wonderful, great kids with great futures, etc., etc. Kids who just happened to be driving way too fast at 3:00 a.m., or to have had the bad judgment to go for a ride with a kid who’d slugged down four or five beers and was headed – really fast – to the liquor store for more. There were the usual pix of their friends sobbing in each others’ arms, and depositing their tributes at the accident site; and (forgive me for being a heartless bitch) all I could think was “And so how many of you will be partying hearty as usual this weekend? Oh, wait, you’ll be grieving – but you’ll be back to normal next weekend.”
Okay, I got that out of my system. Sorry for the sarcasm, but these stories just drive me batty sometimes.
For what it’s worth, those friends sobbing in each others arms likely learned the lesson hard. My best friend had a friend in high school who was driving drunk and stoned when he rolled his topless jeep onto his head. Into adulthood our circle has a strict car key confiscation/DD policy that would make the most neurotic mother happy. Wine with dinner gets you a spot in the guest room, I shit you not. She talked me out of buying a convertable for the same reason. Some scars run deep.
Obsidian, I apologize for bringing up painful memories, and yes, I know that some people DO learn from these things, and change their ways. I know that teenagers tend to think they’re immortal (if they stop to think about such things at all) and seeing friends killed can wake them up to reality. But I know of examples right in my town where the self-destructive behavior barely pauses.
That’s the trouble with generalizations; they generally get you in trouble over the specifics.
There was a particularly ghastly shooting in NJ yesterday, and the photo of the site this morning already had teddy bears piled up atop each other on the sidewalk. All I could think was how many kids would’ve liked one of those bears, which will be all mildewy and dirty by Monday, and in a Dumpster by Tuesday.
