# The sadistic joys of parenting.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 21, 2012, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952 "2012-07-21T13:25:50Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/21 "2012-07-23T18:46:26Z")

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> [@tapu](#):
>
> Nice, Anne! Anything handmade is a good way to go, too. Get fabric markers. Make an insipid design with, like, butterflies and flowers, and wear that to a school function.

Major bonus if you use the [poofy paint](http://shop.hobbylobby.com/products/tulip-ii-puffy-paint-145979/) or [GLITTER!](http://www.joann.com/tulip-fabric-glitter-spray-gold/zprd_10586022b/) Or [Bedazzle](https://www.getbedazzler.com/?mid=1520315) something! THAT would be hysterical!

No, this is NOT the reason my son went into the military. I never embarasseed him THAT much. I don’t think. Well, I’m pretty sure.

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**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/22 "2012-07-23T18:52:08Z")

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I will admit to using poofy paint and glitter on occasion. But I’ve never Bedazzled anything. I do have some standards.

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**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/23 "2012-07-23T18:58:13Z")

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Since we’re hijacking this a little, I find it interesting that kids go through this _embarrassed-of-my-parent_ stage.

My daughter (14) would rather sit in the car than come into any store with me, unless of course there’s something in it for her. Then, I’m not allowed to speak loudly, or whistle, or do anything that would \<gasp\> draw attention to us.

It’s a very interesting, and obviously shared, emotional stage for kids. I honestly don’t think I went through a phase like that with my parents, and my son (13) doesn’t seem to have reached that point yet.

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**Author:** ![ASanders](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asanders/32/3367_2.png) [@ASanders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASanders)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/24 "2012-07-23T19:00:58Z")

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I texted my daughter using her family nickname. Naturally, her friends saw it. 😉

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/25 "2012-07-23T20:34:28Z")

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> [@VunderBob](#):
>
> Pulled this just a couple of weeks ago. VunderKind is now grown and working his first career-related job, and he brought his girlfriend with him for a visit. Wife and I brought out the nekkid baby pictures to show to her.

A year or so ago, when he was in the 3.5-4 range, I took a pic of the Firebug wearing nothing but a pair of underpants - and he was wearing them over his face, with his eyes showing through the leg holes.

That’s my official blackmail pic for when he’s in his teens, as in, “behave, or I show this to your friends!”

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**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/26 "2012-07-23T20:57:07Z")

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> [@VunderBob](#):
>
> My two personal favorites:
> 
> [ul]  
> [li]When VunderKind was an early teen, walking in to Wally\*World or Tarzhey with him, then talking very loudly to him about the need to go to the en’s department to get him some underwear;[/li][li]Pulled this just a couple of weeks ago. VunderKind is now grown and working his first career-related job, and he brought his girlfriend with him for a visit. Wife and I brought out the nekkid baby pictures to show to her.[/li][/ul]
> 
> 😃

Oh, I have even better. I have the picture of my son dismantling a box of tampons, pulling out the contents and using the cardboard applicator as a slide whistle. I CANNOT WAIT TO USE THESE, my house will be so spotless before his friends come over in a few more years. (He is eight right now)  
On the other hand a few years ago I apologized to my mother (who never had a clue) for being so embarrassed and angry at them one time when I was a teenager. (Ok more than once, but this time is particularly memorable, because I was 14 and starting high school)

Their major crime? They took me and my brother (he would have been 9 to my 14) to a MOVIE on a FRIDAY night, then took us to a coffee and donut shop, the one by my high school where people could see me! With my parents!!!111 !!!  
Then-- and this is the evil part— they ordered me a donut. Which they expected me to eat. (I was a bit on the chubby side and had bought in to the whole "I am fat and must never ever be seen to eat in public " idea that year… ) And then they proceeded to talk to me about the movie, discussing opinions and things!

I love my parents and I hope to be equally cruel. But right now my son likes hanging with us, and still lets me hold his hand on the way to school. It will stop soon, so I enjoy it while I can.

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**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/27 "2012-07-23T21:20:56Z")

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My psychologist friend explained to me that the “teen embarrassment at the very suggestion of having parents” is part of a necessary developmental step called individuation. Still hysterical.

Having thoroughly enjoyed the show ourselves, my husband and I took our older daughter to see “Laser Floyd” at the NYC planetarium. For those not familiar with the genre, they use the planetarium projector to do a wild light show to accompany LOUD rock music, in this case Pink Floyd. Said daughter was very grumpy about being required to go. We kept telling her it would be really cool. She doubted that anything \*parents \*thought was cool would be anything but completely lame, or whatever the term was at the time. Until we turned the corner to see the folks waiting in line. At least half, probably 3/4 or 7/8ths were between 18 and 25. Oh, wait.

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**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/28 "2012-07-23T21:21:45Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> I have the picture of my son dismantling a box of tampons, pulling out the contents and using the cardboard applicator as a slide whistle. I CANNOT WAIT TO USE THESE, my house will be so spotless before his friends come over in a few more years. (He is eight right now)

Email these pics to me? Pretty please? I PROMISE not to publish them. Unless your son becomes a rich and famous Warrior Against Women.

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**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/29 "2012-07-23T21:23:03Z")

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I remember having a similar “eureka” moment myself as a teen. I called a friend, she was not home but her father answered the phone and took a message. After I got off the phone, I said something to the effect that Friend’s father was so nice talking to me. My own dad, obviously confused, responed that whenever he did anything like that when my friends called, I got mad about it.

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/30 "2012-07-23T23:01:33Z")

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> [@Leaffan](#):
>
> Since we’re hijacking this a little, I find it interesting that kids go through this _embarrassed-of-my-parent_ stage.

I did, and in a way that I’m now embarrassed by. My dad has a bit of a Bawlmer (Baltimore) accent. The way he talked used to be one of the things I found embarrassing about him. I now know that everyone who speaks any language has an accent, and their accent says nothing about their intelligence, so it was a very silly thing to be embarrassed by.

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**Author:** ![Makeitstop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bb73d2/32.png) [@Makeitstop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Makeitstop)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2012, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/31 "2012-07-23T23:13:32Z")

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> [@MLS](#):
>
> I remember having a similar “eureka” moment myself as a teen. I called a friend, she was not home but her father answered the phone and took a message. After I got off the phone, I said something to the effect that Friend’s father was so nice talking to me. My own dad, obviously confused, responed that whenever he did anything like that when my friends called, I got mad about it.

Wow. Excellent backhanded double half-twist burn by your father there. Well done.

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**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/32 "2012-07-24T00:58:34Z")

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The picture of the tampon slide whistle is unfortunately not digital. I must digitize it , save the negative in the Smithsonian, under glass, preserve this picture by whatever means necessary.

And it is currently half a continent away. Buuuuut it is adorible in the way chubby babies and kittens and puppies are, plus my kid is extra cute (I am biased but he is, his hair was light copper then too) and was wearing nothing but a diaper.

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**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/33 "2012-07-24T01:00:44Z")

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> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#):
>
> I will admit to using poofy paint and glitter on occasion. But I’ve never Bedazzled anything. I do have some standards.

WHAT? Bedazzle is awesome and I’m an under-30 parent.

_scoffs_

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**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/34 "2012-07-24T04:31:54Z")

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> [@MLS](#):
>
> My psychologist friend explained to me that the “teen embarrassment at the very suggestion of having parents” is part of a necessary developmental step called individuation. Still hysterical.

That doesn’t explain why so many kids don’t go through it. Neither I nor my sister went through it, at least. In fact, I wonder if I should start a poll about it, to see how common it actually is.

We didn’t rebel, either. Why would we? We believed the exact same things they did. They weren’t overly strict, nor overly lenient. That was the pattern we saw in the kids that did rebel.

I do wonder how much of the psychology of how kids react when growing up is related not to inherent aspects, but to parenting styles.

Oh, and to not drive the thread too much more off topic: I got a sadistic glee in keeping my dog from being able to get on the bed after peeing on it.

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**Author:** ![Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Curiosity_Kills_Her)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/35 "2012-07-24T04:43:21Z")

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I was seeing a gentleman for a couple of years that had a son, and he used to hang out with me a lot. When we’d be in a store and walk by a group of people I’d sometimes say “NO, Wyatt! I am NOT going to buy you the new Britney Spears CD [pink Barbie corvette, My Little Pony, etc.], I don’t care **how many times** you ask.” He’d turn multiple shades of red - but he loved me. 😉

His dad and I pulled similar variations on one another as well, so he was in good company.

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**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/36 "2012-07-24T13:49:52Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> Oh, and to not drive the thread too much more off topic: I got a sadistic glee in keeping my dog from being able to get on the bed after peeing on it.

You pee on your own bed? Dude…

😉

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**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/37 "2012-07-24T14:41:38Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> That doesn’t explain why so many kids don’t go through it. Neither I nor my sister went through it, at least. In fact, I wonder if I should start a poll about it, to see how common it actually is.
> 
> We didn’t rebel, either. Why would we? We believed the exact same things they did. They weren’t overly strict, nor overly lenient. That was the pattern we saw in the kids that did rebel.
> 
> I do wonder how much of the psychology of how kids react when growing up is related not to inherent aspects, but to parenting styles.
> 
> Oh, and to not drive the thread too much more off topic: I got a sadistic glee in keeping my dog from being able to get on the bed after peeing on it.

All I have to say, to my 13yo son, is “Look, Justin Beiber!” He goes into death throes.

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/38 "2012-07-24T15:02:27Z")

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> [@tapu](#):
>
> All I have to say, to my 13yo son, is “Look, Justin Beiber!” He goes into death throes.

He might like [this video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MEj4h3sni8) of a cat with similar feelings toward Justin Bieber.

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**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/39 "2012-07-24T16:07:41Z")

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I don’t recall parental embarassment, and we had relatively strict parents. Or maybe we were just too rebellious; all I know is I left as soon as I could after my 18th birthday, and my 3 brothers and sisters all left by the time they were 16. My folks were in no way abusive, but my latest bedtime, EVER, even at 18 and living in the house, was 10:00. It was 8-9 oclock up until senior year of high school, if I recall correctly. It was a pretty normal childhood, in that my parents knew where we were at all times \<or thought they did 😉 \>. we were 100 percent responsible for all of our wants, through allowance earned by chores or by whatever money we could earn on our own, etc. Like I said, very normal, but constricting, so we rebelled in our own ways. But never felt embarassed; they were my folks, I loved them, even when I hated them. 😛

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**Author:** ![I\_Like\_Pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9f8e36/32.png) [@I\_Like\_Pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Like_Pie)\
**Post date:** [July 24, 2012, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sadistic-joys-of-parenting/628952/40 "2012-07-24T16:16:09Z")

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> [@tapu](#):
>
> This was maybe a little too intentionally sadistic… and no one really learned from it… but it’s still a good story.
> 
> When my kids were 4, 5, 6, I used to tell them that the ice cream truck played music when it was OUT of ice cream. So they’d sit there looking all glum when it passed. “Sorry, guys, maybe next time.” _hehehehe_

I almost fell in the floor after reading this. That. Is. Amazing.  
Still laughing.

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