# The Scylla theory, the toddler test **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 9, 2002, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183 "2002-05-09T23:26:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2002, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/21 "2002-05-10T20:55:24Z")
Scallia cheated! Bush is stupid! Republicans are meanies! Sharon and Arafat are fightin’! Make them do a time-out! I wanna see “Spider-Man”! Not bad, but not particularly deep… Oh, and definitely **Huggies.** The adhesives on the **Pampers** are too strong – once you close 'em, it’s dang impossible to get them off for a last-second adjustment. ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2002, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/22 "2002-05-10T20:57:23Z")
Hee hee…! Scylla’s pet theory is just as susceptable to all the old behaviors as posting like adults was. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/23 "2002-05-11T01:07:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by december \* > \*\*Mommy! You took away Jimmy’s cap gun! Now Jimmy and Jane are BOTH dead! \*\* Ahhhh, put a \*cork \* in it! [Jimmy, who is constituntionally protected in his right to bear arms successfully sues his Mommy to have his cap gun rightfully returned to him. However, neither the NRA or ACLU or PETA could get Jimmy out of his permenant time out.] ---
**Author:** ![aenea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@aenea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aenea)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/24 "2002-05-11T01:53:14Z")
**Scylla** , Was that a Serlin reference? Gaaaaaaaaaaaa Oh hell, I can’t remember the name of that kid who was doing the socialogy experiment crap-o-la. I must be gettin’ old. ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/25 "2002-05-11T14:36:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by beagledave \* > \*\*If this means that I have to start watching [The Wiggles](http://www.thewiggles.com.au/), then I’m afraid that I will have to kick your candied ass back to the stone age my friend. \*\* AAAUUUUGGHHHHHH!!! I HATE THOSE GUYS!!! They are really dorky and their outfits remind me of the old Star Trek uniforms. If I have to hear “Fruit Salad, yummy yummy” once more, I’ll descend to the mental level of a one-year-old, and a three-year-old’s opinion would seem terribly mature!! (My 7 yr. old loves them, of course.) **Scylla** , all that aside, I think you have a point there! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/26 "2002-05-11T17:51:10Z")
Mommy! Scylla wants me to eat some icky baby lambs and pigs and cows. I don’t like icky baby lambs and pigs and cows… I want veggies, buy Scylla says I can’t have them till I eat the icky baby lambs and pigs and cows! You’re right. This is fun. ---
**Author:** ![Darwins\_Finch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darwins_finch/32/20304_2.png) [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2002, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/27 "2002-05-11T18:40:48Z")
Baby lambs and piggies and cows are _not_ icky! You take that back! It’s only after you hack on them with a chainsaw that they get all icky. And besides, spinach is gross. ---
**Author:** ![modro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@modro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/modro)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/28 "2002-05-29T18:29:57Z")
Mommy, the kids over on the other side of the playground came over and knocked our sandcastle over. They said a magic man in the sky they read about in a book said that we were evil because we had more toys, could wear shorts, and that we tried to keep them from fighting each other. They said the magic man in the sky is going to give them all kinds of lollipops and tootsie rolls for knocking our sandcastle over. Wow, This _IS_ fun ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/29 "2002-05-29T18:49:13Z")
But I don’t _wanna_ play with the fuel effecient Geo Metro Matchbox car! I wanna play with my Tonka Dumptruck! ---
**Author:** ![Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smashed_Ice_Cream)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/30 "2002-05-29T23:46:41Z")
Mommy, just because I’m new at this skool all the cool kids won’t play with me and they just sit around and talk about me to each other just becuz i said theyre clicking and i think they should all be my friends or i’ll kick and scream and call everyone names then i’ll tell them i’m just going home or to someone elses house to play and i shouldn’t have to try to be their freind first because they just just all want to be my friend right away. oh yeah and the teachers are nazis. ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/31 "2002-05-30T03:54:16Z")
Laws for Three-Year-Olds: 1. If I like it, it’s mine. 2. If it’s in my hand, it’s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it’s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it’s mine. 5. If it’s mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way. 6. If I’m doing or building something, all the pieces are mine. 7. If it looks just like mine, it’s mine. 8. If I think it’s mine, it’s mine. BiblioCat, Preschool Teacher 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/32 "2002-05-30T04:18:34Z")
WAHHHHHHHHHHHH! I wanna watch (insert inappropriate cartoon here). ---
**Author:** ![Hazel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e56c9b/32.png) [@Hazel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazel)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/33 "2002-05-30T05:13:32Z")
“Mommie, he took my Florida!” LOL! I love it! ---
**Author:** ![Com2Kid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Com2Kid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Com2Kid)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/34 "2002-05-30T05:18:20Z")
Mommy why do all of those people down there like other gove’ment people who say they don’t like them people? Why do they go an’ keep on defenin what those govenmnt people say? Ok not that good but. . . . 🙂 If I put my lollypop sticks wrap’d aroun’d this wire will the sound come out better? (if anybody gets that one. . . . LOL) ---
**Author:** ![deball](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df705f/32.png) [@deball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deball)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/35 "2002-05-30T12:16:57Z")
You better agree with me. **My** secret society can beat up **your** secret society! Whaahhh! ---
**Author:** ![Rixter1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@Rixter1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rixter1)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/36 "2002-05-30T13:43:27Z")
I like your toys…mine are all sticky! The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there. My cat’s breath smells like cat food. I glued my head to my shoulder. My parents won’t let me use scissors. My worm went in my mouth and then I ate it. Can I have new one? ---
**Author:** ![Com2Kid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Com2Kid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Com2Kid)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/37 "2002-05-30T14:22:20Z")
So umm, when do we forward this thread to all middle eastern national leaders? 😃 I think that Scylla might actualy have something here, LOL! ---
**Author:** ![High\_Deity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9a140/32.png) [@High\_Deity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/High_Deity)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/38 "2002-05-30T18:21:22Z")
## Quote: Laws for Three-Year-Olds: 1. If I like it, it’s mine. 2. If it’s in my hand, it’s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it’s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it’s mine. 5. If it’s mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way. 6. If I’m doing or building something, all the pieces are mine. 7. If it looks just like mine, it’s mine. 8. If I think it’s mine, it’s mine. * * * sounds like how we live anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/39 "2002-05-30T18:34:02Z")
My momy has teached me to read and rite, but I am not very gud yet. But today I did gud so she let me play on her compewtre today. She sed now that I am lurning to reed and rite, I kin lurn to use her compewtre. She duzent no that I use her ay oh el now. I go to some cites that gronups go to. Theres this wun cite I go to caled strate dop. It has funny peeple but also some menies. Sumetimes I heer bad words like daddy sez. These come from menies. I dont like meenies. Theres a kid who beats me and my frends up. Hes a meenie. I dont like him. Sum peeple on state dop be like meenie kid and beet up others. I dont like them eathr. Sumtimes unmeenies use bad words like daddy to but they dont be meenies all times unlike reel meenies. I hop you engoy my storee. I write it with no help frum mommy or daddy. ---
**Author:** ![runforrestrun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a3d4f5/32.png) [@runforrestrun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runforrestrun)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2002, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183/40 "2002-05-30T23:03:28Z")
hmmm, we can send these painfully logical arguments to those camel jockeys when they stop being “butt heads, pee pee faces and poop heads.” First, they have to grow up. Ahem! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-scylla-theory-the-toddler-test/108183.md?page=3)