# The SDMB Mommy's Group (Daddies Welcome!) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 28, 2004, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948 "2004-08-28T14:39:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 16
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2004, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/301 "2004-11-20T15:14:35Z")
Er, I guess a link might help… [http://hometown.aol.com/jthorn1934/myhomepage/index.html](http://hometown.aol.com/jthorn1934/myhomepage/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2004, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/302 "2004-11-20T19:14:34Z")
> [@fessie](#): > > Re: cow’s milk - I’ve read that formula has a better balance of nutrients & whole milk too much protein. But geez - 11 months versus 12? I wonder about that, too - all of a sudden, one more day & everything that wasn’t safe suddenly is? Your approach of introducing it gradually makes sense. Mine have had yogurt, cheese and a little taste of ice cream, with no ill effects. Yeah, that’s pretty much my thoughts. One day makes that much difference? Besides I figure if I introduce it gradually when we start losing the formula he won’t be freaking out that ‘this doesn’t taste right’ and refuse to drink it at all. We just buy one of the 500mL of whole milk and keep it in the fridge for him, anything more goes to waste as I prefer 1%. **JohnT** She looks so cute! ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/303 "2004-11-21T04:15:22Z")
> [@Velma](#): > > I have a question for anyone - when did you all start your kids on a sippy cup? I would like to start as soon as possible, I bought some that say they are for kids 6 months and up but I don’t know how to teach him to drink from it. The reason I want him to start soon is that he just plain refuses a bottle of any kind and I would like him to be able to be fed by other people. The only way he will eat is if milk is dropped in his mouth with a medicine dropper or squirted in from the bottle, he will tolerate a few ounces that way but not a full feeding, and he gets a lot of air that way. I am back at work and currently I have to go back and forth to feed him at his daycare, luckily I only work part time and they are very accomodating for me! But once in a while it would be nice to leave him with someone else without worrying if he is hungry, you know? Plus I think my husband is feeling left out of the feeding experience. > > He is starting to be interested in putting everything in his mouth now, but he just plays with things. He won’t latch or suck on a nipple or even a pacifier. Will this make it easier or harder to teach him to drink from a cup? You still have to kind of suck on the sippy cups to make the milk come out. Should I start giving him an empty cup just to play with and put in his mouth so he gets used to it? I keep meaning to reply to you - nice to hear from you! Congratulations on your son! That must be tough, being the sole food source for your baby! At our four-month checkup my pediatrician said it would be fine to introduce the sippy or just a plain old cup. She said you might be surprised, some kids pick right up on it. Since I’m bottle feeding it hasn’t been a burning issue for me, but I have tried the cup now & then and they’re not bad at it. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2004, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/304 "2004-11-21T10:05:37Z")
Our girl was breastfed only for the first 5 months, and couldn’t figure out bottles at all (well, she finally managed it at around 8 months, but that was well _after_ the cup!) Anyway, we never got the standard “sippy-cup” thing with a spout - we had one with a built-in straw which I highly recommend at least trying out … I don’t know if it’s any easier or harder really, but it’s very nice now that if we go out we don’t have to worry about taking big clunky baby cups with us, just pop a straw in the nappy bag. We started with that, and also just a plain old cup, at around 5 months or so. It took her quite a while to get the hang of it … maybe about 2 months with the straw, and it took her another 6 months to be able to drink from the plain cup without half the water ending up on her shirt. I’d just say have a go with whatever type of cup you like and don’t worry if half of it ends up on her front. I’d practise with water rather than milk though! ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/305 "2004-11-23T15:07:02Z")
I’m wondering… When does the repetition end? “Mommy, I wanna go to the park. I wanna go to the park, Mommy.” “Sophie, we can’t. We’re in the middle of a four hour drive to see your grandmother.” “I wanna go to the park! Pweeee? I wanna go to the park, mommy.” “Sophie, hush.” “Daddy? I wanna go to the park.” “Sophie, we just told you that we can’t. Maybe tomorrow.” _softly_ “I wanna go to the park.” _seeing a photograph_ “That’s my birthday party!” “That’s right! That is your birthday party.” “NO! Thats _my_ birthday party!” “Sophie that’s just what I said!” “_My_ birthday party.” (She does know her pronouns, the difference between “my” and “yours”, and uses them properly, so that’s _not_ the issue in the last example.) ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/306 "2004-11-23T15:18:47Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > I’m wondering… > > When does the repetition end? Never, I’m afraid. Today it’s “mommy, I wanna go to the park, I wanna go to the park” In a couple of years it’ll be “I just wanna watch one more show before bed; I just wanna read one more book before bed; I just want one more drink of water before bed” which progresses to “I don’t like my second grade teacher; he’s mean. I don’t like my third grade teacher, she’s mean” which progresses to “Mom, can I have some new makeup? Mom, can I have some new jeans? Mom, can I have some new money?” ad infinitum. The exact phrases being repeted change, the repetition is forever, I’m afraid. Good luck! Right now, we’re dealing with “I want that for Christmas” in response to every tv commercial, newspaper circular, billboard, etc. Doesn’t matter if it’s age-appropriate, Mariah will put qualifiers in. Somewhere along the line, she’s become convinced that she’s going to have a baby (in the near future, I mean) so if it’s a baby or toddler toy, she’ll say “I want that for Christmas for my little baby” if it’s something much too “old” for her, it’s “I want that for Christmas when I’m bigger”. I’m about to scream! I’m also about to make a rule that, as soon as Christmas is over, I don’t want to hear anything about next Christmas until next Thanksgiving! ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/307 "2004-11-23T16:38:26Z")
Yeah, we’re still hearing about Sophie’s upcoming birthday… you know, the one that we celebrated just a month ago. :rolleyes: :love: (Why doesn’t this board have a “love” (heart) smilie?) ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/308 "2004-11-23T18:25:20Z")
You know, I learned something recently that I thought I’d share. The babies have become sooo delightful now that they’re older - I’m actually (finally) starting to _like_ being Mommy. Zoe actually SAID “Mom-my” the other day!! But it’s still a problem with Bryce pulling Zoe’s hair. So now I’ve got two playpens - I love it b/c my fear is that our living room will never be truly babyproofed anyway & now and then I do need to pee. Being able to put them in playpens next to each other feels better than segregating him in the next room when he’s being rowdy. And Bryce wasn’t getting “No!”. I’d pull him off her, set him aside, give him other toys; I tried putting him in his crib, tapped his little hand, shouted – nothing. He’d just laugh at the funny new faces Mommy was making and go right back at it. And he’s imitating me - he’ll say “Oooo” while he shakes his head. It’s too cute. But the concept is beyond him. So now I just clap my hands loudly and say “Stop!” and separate them, and I don’t worry about the discipline at all. I cease the behavior, consistently, but have let go of teaching the concept. Because what I realized is that when he laughed at my attempts at discipline, it made me angry. Really angry. There’s just nothing like someone laughing at you when you’re trying to teach them “No”. I talked to my sister the psychologist about this & she agreed that 9 months is too early to grasp concepts (at least for my kid). Actually she says they can’t reason until they’re about 4 years old (does that sound right to you guys?) and that what happens is perfectly nice, intelligent, reasonable parents go off on their kids because the kids aren’t responding to logic & they wind up smacking them. And you know, I could see how that could happen. My feeling is that the best way for me to succeed as a parent is to set up the situation to make it possible. So if I can learn to expect age-appropriate behaviors from my children, then those behaviors won’t upset me. That’s my best guess, anyway. I think that’s one reason why it helps to connect with other parents & find out what everyone else is going through. So I just thought I’d share. It is amazing how angry and frustrated one can become. And even if they hate the playpens, they can still tough it out for 15 minutes so I can do the dishes or whatever. Having a lit-tle bit of control (now that they’re older) feels like the right choice. Anyway, that’s where I’m at. And wishing I could bend and stretch time over Thanksgiving to allow for more visiting! Hope y’all have a great weekend! JohnT - Your daughter is a doll! ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948/309 "2004-11-23T19:07:57Z")
> [@fessie](#): > > So if I can learn to expect age-appropriate behaviors from my children, then those behaviors won’t upset me. It absolutely helps to know what’s age appropriate! When Mariah was a baby, and through toddlerhood, I took her to a local place called The Family Center, for playtime. I took her there so she could socialize with kids her own age, since her sisters were so much older than her. Well, a lot of the mothers there were very young, and inexperienced, and would get so angry and frustrated when their 16 month old baby wouldn’t share, or something like that. Well, that’s kind of like getting frustrated with your dog for not fixing dinner! Some expectations are just unreasonable, and it really helps to know what’s reasonable and what’s not. > [@](#): > > Actually she says they can’t reason until they’re about 4 years old (does that sound right to you guys?) Like everything else, there’s a range. My oldest daughter could reason fairly well when she was barely three (then lost the knack when she turned 12 😃 ), but four is about right. You can’t expect a kid much younger than that to follow rules with any consistency. That doesn’t mean you don’t enforce the rules, just have reasonable expectations. One of the reasons young children often thrive in pre-K is that things are set up so that it’s _easier_ to follow the rules than not to. It’s all repetition, and they know exactly what’s expected of them. Small children love routine (which is why it’s really hard to bend the rules to accommodate “just this once”; when a four year old does something the same way for two days in a row, in their little mind that makes it an established tradition). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-mommys-group-daddies-welcome/261948.md?page=15)