# The SDMB Stupid, Stupid Movie Awards **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 24, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633 "2005-10-24T05:47:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/1 "2005-10-24T05:47:21Z")
I had the television on the other night and Face/Off came on. I caught this movie years ago and never thought much about it. This time around I watched a few scenes as I read SDMB and Slashdot. I was blown away by how stupid this movie really is. First, the acting sucks. I think in some movies Nick Case can carry himself well enough. That said this is the third of his triple whammy bad movie run (The Rock, Con Air, Face/Off) so by now he’s had a crash course in crap acting - crapting?. How about I just say Nick Cage is hit or miss when it comes to movies. This movie is hard to watch **because** of his bad acting/overacting. Half the time he just seems out of place. Travolta pulled off the part of Troy better then Cage did - and Cage was supposed to be Troy. Second, when is this movie supposed to take place? The present? The future? Most of the movie seems to take place in the present. The cars, houses, guns; most style seems to be current. Then they throw in the future jail scenes and the medical room of the future complete with lasers that grow ears in a Pyrex dish. Let’s not forget the lasers that heal wounds. Granted they have to create some of these elements to explain how they pull a face off one guy and stick it on another. I do like the one line a doctor says about face transplants. He credits the “advances in anti-inflammatories”. Forget about anti-rejection medication. It’s all about inflamation. :smack: There’s also the scene where the FBI got a data disk with bomb blueprints on it (or something like that). It’s a zip disk. A ZIP DISK? Even 1990’s _The Adventures of Ford Fairlane_ knew to put data on a CD. But in 1997’s Face/Off, where you can grow ears in cookware, a 100mb zip disk is good enough for all your data needs. Third, the super creepy face wipe thing John Travolta likes to do to people. Who does this ever? You know, I could go on all night. I nominate **Face/Off** for the **Overacting, Sci-Fi movie too lazy to be proper Sci-Fi, SDMB Stupid, Stupid Movie Award**. What is your pick for the SDMB Stupid, Stupid Movie Award? Why? ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/2 "2005-10-24T07:46:23Z")
I loved _Face/Off_. In fact, I also loved \*ConAir \*and _The Rock_. But I liked _Face/Off_ the best, of those three. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/3 "2005-10-24T08:56:36Z")
I loved those three as well, but the stories are still waaay off in fantasy land. I nominate _The Day After Tomorrow_ and _The Core_. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 9:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/4 "2005-10-24T09:11:35Z")
Disaster movies tend to fit into this category. I nominate _Armageddon_ and _Day After Tomorrow_. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/5 "2005-10-24T09:23:47Z")
[_Signs_](http://maddox.xmission.com/c.cgi?u=signs). ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/6 "2005-10-24T10:25:56Z")
Don’t we have enough of these threads that are inevitably doomed to degenerate into posters battering each other with their subjective preferences? So, you don’t like a couple of movies that did well at the box office, and apparently can’t cope with the idea that other people _actually liked them_. Learn to live with disappointment. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/7 "2005-10-24T12:29:15Z")
Lifetime Achievement Award, Stupidest movie of all time: **Alien**. [See here for its testimonial](http://www.sff.net/people/rothman/alien.htm). ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/8 "2005-10-24T13:33:12Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Lifetime Achievement Award, Stupidest movie of all time: **Alien**. > > [See here for its testimonial](http://www.sff.net/people/rothman/alien.htm). Why doesn’t his tagline “Schenectady’s Leading Science Fiction Writer” fill me with awe? ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/9 "2005-10-24T13:42:54Z")
> [@Mr. Blue Sky](#): > > Why doesn’t his tagline “Schenectady’s Leading Science Fiction Writer” fill me with awe? Because you don’t understand the meaning of the word “irony.” It’s interesting that you’d rather pull an ad hominem attack on a minor joke: is it because you can’t refute the essay itself? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/10 "2005-10-24T14:10:14Z")
I’ve seen more bad movies in the past year than I can remember, but I’ll stick with my old favorite The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. My favorite parts: When a criminal is running away, Sean Connery is about to shoot him, but can’t see without his glasses. So he takes the time to put his glasses on, then takes aim… _while looking over tops of what are apparently reading glasses_. Captain Nemo’s enormous submarine, at least 300 feet long anf 5 stories high, navigating the narrow canals of Venice. The brand spankin’ new, freshly built in the past 3 months fortress. Complete with cobwebs and long-forgotten secret passageways. Face/Off? Bah. ---
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/11 "2005-10-24T14:10:51Z")
Great essay, **Chuck**. I think **Mr. Blue Sky** was making a joke, rather than a personal attack on the world’s most beloved sci-fi writer/movie critic. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/12 "2005-10-24T14:16:51Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Because you don’t understand the meaning of the word “irony.” > > It’s interesting that you’d rather pull an ad hominem attack on a minor joke: is it because you can’t refute the essay itself? I know irony. What I saw was the work of a hack. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/13 "2005-10-24T14:18:55Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Because you don’t understand the meaning of the word “irony.” > > It’s interesting that you’d rather pull an ad hominem attack on a minor joke: is it because you can’t refute the essay itself? So, he didn’t like Alien. Why should I care? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/14 "2005-10-24T14:38:57Z")
Uh, if you don’t care whether someone liked a particular movie, why are you even reading this thread? Isn’t the whole point to identify movies we feel are stupid, and explain why? ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/15 "2005-10-24T14:39:22Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Lifetime Achievement Award, Stupidest movie of all time: **Alien**. > > [See here for its testimonial](http://www.sff.net/people/rothman/alien.htm). All those objections to the logic of the movie and he doesn’t even question the alien’s enormous increase in mass between the chestburster scene and its first meal? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/16 "2005-10-24T14:42:44Z")
> [@Dewey Finn](#): > > Uh, if you don’t care whether someone liked a particular movie, why are you even reading this thread? Isn’t the whole point to identify movies we feel are stupid, and explain why? Well, I like Alien, so I was curious to see another person’s viewpoint. It is possible for someone to dislike a movie and present it in a humorous way. This was not one of those moments. Of course, Alien had plot holes big enough to fly the Nostromo through, it didn’t detract from my viewing pleasure. You could substitute nearly any blockbuster and find hole after hole after hole. Show me a perfectly executed movie. ---
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/17 "2005-10-24T14:48:40Z")
Okay, I was wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/18 "2005-10-24T15:00:07Z")
I find most of the essay on _Alien_ to be unconvincing. Plenty of spoilers below, so be warned. > [@](#): > > First of, it was incredibly stupid to let the alien aboard. Ripley showed one of the few bits of intelligence by refusing to let Kane inside. The others outside were pretty dumb to insist she does so. But Ash lets him in. That action was so incredibly stupid it was impossible to believe. (I know it was explained later, but by then it was way too late.) So, the “plot hole” is explained. Then what’s the problem with it? It’s not a plot hole anymore. Furthermore, even if Ash had been human this is not beyond human fallibility. Ripley’s the hardass stickler for the rules, Ash is the guy who can’t bear leaving his comrades. That wouldn’t be implausible at all, and this explanation doesn’t even have to come into play as there is a better one later in the film. > [@](#): > > OK, we all know Evil Corporation, Inc. are only interested in profits and has absolutely no regard for human life; it’s written into their prospectus. So they don’t care about the crew. > > But what about the millions of tons of ore? That’s got to be valuable. And they’d risk that? Why? I don’t see how they’re really risking the ore. Remember, they didn’t know about the aliens beforehand. Ash made sure to bring a specimen on board because he’s programmed to do so, nor because he’s programmed to get that specific alien. > [@](#): > > Why not just send a ship consisting of people who are prepared for the alien? Because they can’t be prepared for it, they don’t know what it is. > [@](#): > > And, wouldn’t you know, Parker and Lambert run into the alien. Parker is carrying a weapon. So what does he do when faced with the alien? > > Nothing. > > Oh, there’s some shouting about telling Lambert to get out of the way (though if she had an IQ of a plant, would have figured this out). But anyone with any brains would shoot first and hope their partner knew enough to get out of the line of fire. Granted, Lambert probably doesn’t have enough sense to get out of the way of gunfire, but still. Lambert freezes in terror, like many of us would, and Parker doesn’t have the presence of mind or the coldbloodedness to shoot straight through Lambert. Not implausible at all. > [@](#): > > losing millions of tons of cargo. Is Evil Corporation, Inc. going to dock her pay? Maybe. If so, that happens after this film and the fact doesn’t alter this film at all, so why even bring it up? In short, I’m severely unimpressed. Now, there are a couple of holes in _Alien_. Rothman brings up one: simply let the air out of the ship, especially after the alien has entered the ducts. Yep, I’ll grant that one and I wish someone would have mentioned it, and a reason they don’t do it, in the movie. Rothman also has a problem with no-one telling Dallas which way the alien is coming from, and he not asking. Sure, I’ll grant that one too, but it feels like a minor deal and wouldn’t have affected the movie anyway. Dallas would still be alien food. I have one plot hole to bring up that Rothman missed: the alien manages to increase in mass, apparently without consuming anything. Either the fully-grown alien is incredibly light (and it doesn’t seem to be), or it magiced extra mass from another dimension, or it looted an onboard food store, which seems the most likely alternative but should have been mentioned. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/19 "2005-10-24T15:11:55Z")
This whole thing is my fault. After reading the first line of Rothman’s review: > [@Chuck Rothman](#): > > Now I don’t care much for modern horror films. I should have stopped reading. The review strikes me as the kind of thing someone (anyone, really) would write about anything whose popularity the writer doesn’t understand, but must see for himself. I’ll even overlook this line: > [@Chuck Rothman](#): > > Oh, and to set the self-destruct mechanism (note that this is easier to stop than to stop. Proofread much, Mr. Rothman? ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2005, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633/20 "2005-10-24T15:15:12Z")
I gotta agree on **Alien** – and I’ve said so many times before. It’s a somewhat confused picture, and if you look at the early concepts and sketches you can see that they were playing around with a lot of different ideas, and didn’t quite figure ot which ones to completely kerep and which ones to jettison. **Alien** gets big points for getting Giger to do the alien and other design. Without him, I think this film wouldn’t even be remembered. The original sketches, pre-Giger, weren’t terifically memorable. Ridley Scotyt is a helluva good director, but Scott’s alien _made_ that movie. The actions of the people are incredibly stupid at several points. I can’t work up enough sympathy for them, and the rules of good design, good science, and common sense are violated too often. I simply can’t watch the film with pleasure. If you want to see the same idea done earlier, but more satisfyingly, get hold of **It! The Terror from Beyond Space** , written by SF writer Jerome Bixby. I’m convinced O’Bannon, Schuster, et al. strip-mined this low0budget 1950’s film for Alien. It! has its own problems (I simply can’t bel;ieve an expedition to Mars carrying guns – although Robinson Crusoe on Mars has the same idioocy; also, in this film people are using up that precious oxygen by smoking, too), but it’s much better than most 50’s films and more conbincing than Alien. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-sdmb-stupid-stupid-movie-awards/327633.md?page=2)