# The Seinfeld Reality Distortion Field **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 24, 2008, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509 "2008-12-24T05:24:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2008, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/21 "2008-12-25T05:42:24Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > But at least they make fun of themselves by having Marisa Tomei completely fall for him. “How is it that a man so bald… and so quirky…” George swept her off her feet with his “manure” monologue. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2008, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/22 "2008-12-25T10:59:14Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > I have the same problem. I love the show and watch it all the time in syndication, but some suspension of disbelief or the characters’ neurosis bother me because of their extremism. Jerry especially has all these little traits that, while funny on TV, I would hate in a real life acquaintence. > > For example, entire episodes would be excised from the show if he had simply stopped and asked a simple question of the women he has problems with. Like “Why do you wear the same dress all the time?” instead of snooping in her closet first. Or “Why did your friends think that me taking you out is like a charity case?” Or my most annoying one, he could have just told her “I’m sorry, I knocked your toothbrush into the toilet.” > > Each time the question was either not posed or posed too late. You could also apply that reasoning (i.e. common sense) to Sex and the City and watch 99% of its episodes disintegrate. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2008, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/23 "2008-12-25T14:13:39Z")
George had a lot of superficial relationships with women, but most of them broke up with him when they realized how superficial he was. His only long term girlfriend was Susan, who left him, became a lesbian, and then came back and agreed to marry him. That turn of events was ridiculous. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2008, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/24 "2008-12-25T16:53:46Z")
> [@Mahaloth](#): > > I think Mulva would have made more sense. In what way? Mulva isn’t a real name (that I’m aware of.) Dolores is a real name. And some people _do_ pronounce clitoris so that it rhymes with Dolores. ---
**Author:** ![PetW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@PetW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PetW)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/25 "2008-12-26T02:59:44Z")
Plus, it’s certainly enough like “clitoris” for schoolyard kids to make fun of her for it. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/26 "2008-12-26T06:47:12Z")
George seemed to be well paid for working in real estate and at the Yankees. He was paying $2,000 a month for his Manhattan flat. He was also a college grad Susan liked him originally because he was a writer (or so she thought). She came back to him after her lesbianism “didn’t take.” George had women like Marisa but she had a thing for bald guys, he liked the lady with the big nose, who dumped him after her nose job. He got Chelsea Nobel (who I’ve seen in real life and is stunningly beautiful) but on the show she liked short bald men. He dated the girl from Drew Carey but looks weren’t important to her. So the writers did make some attempt to explain why George got dates. Look at “Three’s Company,” no woman in the entire show could walk within three feet of Jack without making a physical sexual pass at him. How often would that happen to any man in real life much less a paunchy, 30 year old, who’s out of work for most of the series, like Jack was. ---
**Author:** ![Nom\_de\_Plume](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/85f322/32.png) [@Nom\_de\_Plume](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nom_de_Plume)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/27 "2008-12-29T15:29:52Z")
[quote=“Hippy\_Hollow, post:1, topic:478509”] Okay, nobody watches the show for _realism._ [li]Jerry’s pickup lines are ridiculously weak. Seinfeld the sitcom star is funny. Seinfeld the stand up comic is pathetic. No woman would allow the person who uttered “You might not know it to look at me, but I can run really fast!” an extra second.[/li][/QUOTE] I think that line would work. While I’ve been happily married to Mrs. de Plume for a long time, I remember that lines like that usally worked for me, at least to break the ice. The women I would want to talk to had, most likely, heard every other line before and usually found something a little different to be refreshing. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/28 "2008-12-29T16:53:10Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > I think it was more or less implied that Kramer had made a lot of bank from his coffee table book. > > The “two-face” thing was a comic exaggeration of a real phenomenon in that some people can go back and forth from looking attractive to looking bad – it’s a highly subjective thing, of course, but the Seinfeld characters were largely defined by their preoccupations with petty, nitpicking “flaws” in the people they dated. > > I don’t think it’s unrealistic that Jerry - a minor celebrity in the context of the show – would be able to charm women with silly pickup lines. > > I agree that it wasn’t realistic for George to able to get the women that he got. I can’t fanwank that one. Obviously it’s the flip side of the Roma curse that assailed Costanza throughout his unlife. Rather than make George’s misery unremitting (and thus something he’d get used to), the gypsies enchanted him so that beautiful women would mysteriously grow attracted to him, allowing him glimpses of life, love, and hope, and then, at seemingly random moments, withdraw their affections, throwing him deeper into the dank pits of despair. It’s his own fault for killing that one gypsy chick. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/29 "2008-12-29T17:34:32Z")
Kramer having no visible means of support. Kramer getting so many cute girls. Kramer not getting beaten up a lot more. Jerry not charging Kramer for food he took. Jerry not forbidding Kramer from ever coming into his apartment again. George having unfettered access to George Steinbrenner. Elaine not noticing her nipple showed in her holiday card before she sent it out. So few black people around. …still a great show, though! ---
**Author:** ![Hippy\_Hollow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hippy_hollow/32/4841_2.png) [@Hippy\_Hollow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hippy_Hollow)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/30 "2008-12-30T07:38:18Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > So few black people around. But they made up for it in quality. Jackie Chiles and Rebecca DeMornay crack me up whenever they’re on screen. Here’s one I noticed today. In the episode “The Mohel,” George is trying to get compensation for his damaged car because a hospital patient committed suicide and landed on his roof. George is made out to be a callous moneygrubber. Wouldn’t any hospital be at least in a conversation about liability if they allowed their patients to jump off buildings and crush cars? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/31 "2008-12-30T08:05:27Z")
> [@Hippy\_Hollow](#): > > Here’s one I noticed today. In the episode “The Mohel,” George is trying to get compensation for his damaged car because a hospital patient committed suicide and landed on his roof. George is made out to be a callous moneygrubber. Wouldn’t any hospital be at least in a conversation about liability if they allowed their patients to jump off buildings and crush cars? I saw that today, too. Seems obvious enough to me that George’s insurance company would be having some frank talks with the hospital’s attorneys. ---
**Author:** ![mshar253](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@mshar253](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mshar253)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/32 "2008-12-30T08:32:52Z")
> [@Hippy\_Hollow](#): > > But they made up for it in quality. Jackie Chiles and **Rebecca DeMornay** crack me up whenever they’re on screen. Wait… what? ETA: Nevermind, I had to google a little more closely to get it. ---
**Author:** ![Radegast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c4cdca/32.png) [@Radegast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Radegast)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/33 "2008-12-30T10:53:20Z")
The biggest distortion for me is this whole “its a show about nothing” crap. The show is I Love Lucy, with Jerry as Lucy and the other characters filling the Ricky, Fred and Ethel roles. It could be really funny, and I always enjoyed it, despite the glaring unrealities, but don’t say that its about nothing. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/34 "2008-12-30T12:49:00Z")
But it is about nothing. Not literally about nothing–it wouldn’t air for long if all you got was static. But “nothing” in TV terms. Instead of a plot, or motivations, the characters were just going about their daily lives, but making acute observations about the mundanities of those lives. That was the pitch, at first: “See, here’s a comedy routine–and Seinfeld’s hot, so that’s a good thing, right?–then his friends will act out some of the petty issues and there will be resolution. Trust me, this will be funny.” The first season, that’s pretty much what they did–a woman from out of town flies into NYC to meet with Jerry, who gets all romantic but it turns out she’s engaged. Most of that first episode is George telling Jerry how to pick up signals (a comedy routine) and Jerry telling George that his shirt button is misplaced. In sit-com terms that’s nothing. No hijinx, no unforeseen reversals, just life. Eventually they did start introducing some farfetched plots or riffing off some of the characters’ more bizarre traits–they turned the show’s four mundane leads into four dangerous psychopaths at times-- but I think the essence of the show is the first few mundane scripts. Lucy was a whackjob from the start and only grew more so. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/35 "2008-12-30T13:58:07Z")
I never thought it was “a show about nothing.” I always thought it was “the show about making (comedic) mountains out of molehills.” ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/36 "2008-12-30T18:38:42Z")
> [@Markxxx](#): > > Clit-OR-us or CLIT-er-us both are acceptable. That is OFFENSIVE! Markxxx I am suing you for sexual harrassment for pointing that out! ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/37 "2008-12-30T19:43:11Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Not literally about nothing–it wouldn’t air for long if all you got was static. But “nothing” in TV terms. Instead of a plot, or motivations, the characters were just going about their daily lives, but making acute observations about the mundanities of those lives. That was the pitch, at first: “See, here’s a comedy routine–and Seinfeld’s hot, so that’s a good thing, right?–then his friends will act out some of the petty issues and there will be resolution. Trust me, this will be funny.” I always thought the original pitch for the show was “I’m a comedian and the show will go through my life and show the audience where I get my material from.” That’s why they interspersed his stand-up comedy, it was supposed to be the bits that were inspired by the show we’re watching. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/38 "2008-12-30T20:17:37Z")
> [@Punintentional](#): > > The beauty about Kramer is that there is no explanation. Exactly. He doesn’t _do_ anything. As a minor celeb with plenty of schoolyard charm and a cute face, I believe women would be interested in Jerry. But his outfits… good lord. The giant sneakers, ill-fitting jeans. You think one or two of them would have sorted him out in that area. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/39 "2008-12-30T20:23:44Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > I never thought it was “a show about nothing.” I always thought it was “the show about making (comedic) mountains out of molehills.” Well, it’s better than _Curb Your Enthusiasm_, which is a show about the same damn thing over and over. ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509/40 "2008-12-30T20:56:17Z")
I respectfully disagree. I find Curb to be hysterical and what Seinfeld could’ve been if allowed to be filthy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-seinfeld-reality-distortion-field/478509.md?page=3)