# The smart condom is coming!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [March 3, 2017, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327 "2017-03-03T19:45:50Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![aldiboronti](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc348/32.png) [@aldiboronti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aldiboronti)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327/1 "2017-03-03T19:45:50Z")

</div>

[High-Tech Condom Ring Coming Out To Measure Boink Performance](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/icon-condom-app_us_58b911e0e4b0b99894167584)

> [@](#):
>
> The i.Con tracks speed, “average thrust velocity,” duration, skin temperature, girth, calories burned (no joke) and frequency of sessions. Most importantly for many, no doubt, will be how a wearer stacks up to the average and “best” performers — though a sexual partner will likely have an insight or two about that. Statistics are tracked via an i.Con app.
> 
> The i.Con is also supposed to be able to sense sexually transmitted diseases.

Not for me. No way am I risking someone hacking my dick!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327/2 "2017-03-03T19:48:06Z")

</div>

As is(hopefully) the person wearing it?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327/3 "2017-03-03T20:25:47Z")

</div>

I assume the data is displayed on a… ummm… spread sheet?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Fruitbat2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Fruitbat2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fruitbat2)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327/4 "2017-03-03T20:28:11Z")

</div>

Oh god, just what we need, more guys believing sex is a sport with objective number measurements that they can “win,” like length (who cares about length?) and the uber-annoying, self-glorifying and clueless questions about female orgasms, “Did you come yet? I’m going to make you come. How many times did you come? Huh? Huh? Huh?”

IMO, the only measurement that says if you were good or not is your partner’s level of enthusiasm to do it again. Amirite?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\
**Post date:** [March 3, 2017, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-smart-condom-is-coming/781327/5 "2017-03-03T21:24:08Z")

</div>

> [@Fruitbat2](#):
>
> IMO, the only measurement that says if you were good or not is your partner’s level of enthusiasm to do it again. Amirite?

Indeed, the only measure of success in life, in all aspects, is the amount of repeat business one gets.