# The Straight Dope Bar Fight **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 2, 2000, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776 "2000-08-02T00:48:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 22
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/421 "2000-08-06T07:53:28Z")
what the hell do you mean you don’t want to play anymore? you can’t just stop MPD. so what, you regenerated a limb. I’ve already gotten in a few good shots with the beer. Running around bar in circles avoiding wrath of feelyat. Hey wait a second. If you can regenerate limbs, why didn’t you do that for the plan then you could have used two legs to hit people instead of sausages. The twisted webs you create. I’m a scorpio if that’s what you meant. ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/422 "2000-08-06T07:55:21Z")
Why are you getting all technical with me? I’m only a little kid. :o( I’m not very smart. Can I buy you a drink? ;o) ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/423 "2000-08-06T08:00:07Z")
you say that, but i don’t know too many little kids who would try to buy alcohol for a minor. what kind of little kid are you? what did your parents do to you? :thwap: running again ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/424 "2000-08-06T08:03:00Z")
_Blind runs up the stairs (always a second floor in these bars) to the balcony, takes careful aim with her gun (loaded with superhero piercing bullets) and shoots down the chandleier … it falls in slowmotion to encompass SteelJaw, trapping his arms and knocking him somwhat silly_ Go get 'em Feelyat! I’m gonna slide down the bannister, kicking John down while he attempts to sleep against the spindles … Yee Ha! _Goes to bar, tosses back a three shots tequilla, breaks stoll over the barkeeps head_ Want me to ride my bike around in here and see who gets up and runs? ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/425 "2000-08-06T08:04:27Z")
Does 16 count as a little kid? Hey!! Why’d ya thwap me?!!? ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/426 "2000-08-06T08:09:26Z")
Hey! SteelJaw is my friend!! \ \ ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/427 "2000-08-06T08:10:22Z")
16! Why, you’re just a baby! _ducks as three rolls of duct tape flies at her head_ ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/428 "2000-08-06T08:11:44Z")
Well, if I’m a baby nobody should try to hurt me!!! :oD Good idea? ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/429 "2000-08-06T08:11:48Z")
I only incapacitated him for ya … what you choose to do with him whilst he’s trussed up like a holiday pig is up to you, sweetie!! (Use your imagination :)) ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/430 "2000-08-06T08:12:30Z")
bwa ha ha. I have a steel jaw jaw jaw. :that was a poem: and so steeljaw chews through the crystal walks over to feelyat thwaps her again and rips off one of her legs then sticks the leg in the spokes of blind’s bike steeljaw is triumphant yet again oh yeah, then he walks over to the bar and throws back three shots of apple juice, cause he’s a minor. ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/431 "2000-08-06T08:13:36Z")
You’re in a bar fight! Expect to be hurt, we don’t actually card anyone in here … 🙂 _stacks like cord wood all the unconcious brawlers_ ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/432 "2000-08-06T08:13:46Z")
sorry about the leg feely, but i needed it ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/433 "2000-08-06T08:14:20Z")
I think I’ll sing show tunes to him!!! :oD And if he’s cute I’ll make him promise to go out with me for setting him free…or buy me things. If he isn’t cute I’ll properly dispose of him. ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/434 "2000-08-06T08:15:01Z")
steeljaw pushes over the stacked unconscious, rendering all of blind’s hard work useless. ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/435 "2000-08-06T08:16:18Z")
Steeljaw, are you like 10 years old? ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/436 "2000-08-06T08:16:18Z")
OOO! A leg in my spoke, a leg in my spoke! LOL! Glad it’s not mine! _removes feely’s leg, mounts bike and rides up to bar brandishing the leg at the barkeep_ Apple Jack for all my concious mates!! ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/437 "2000-08-06T08:16:51Z")
you women and your superficial attitudes. always treating men like a piece of cute meat, and if they’re not cute, like a piece of ugly meat. ---
**Author:** ![Feelyat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3be4f8/32.png) [@Feelyat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feelyat)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/438 "2000-08-06T08:18:13Z")
I have a new leg now, no big deal. \ ---
**Author:** ![steeljaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@steeljaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steeljaw)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/439 "2000-08-06T08:18:21Z")
if by ten you mean seventeen…then yeah. You’re spokes are wrecked damn it. Drop feely’s leg now. Don’t make me go medieval on your ass. ---
**Author:** ![BlindFaithe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@BlindFaithe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlindFaithe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776/440 "2000-08-06T08:18:46Z")
If he’s, like 10, we’re in a lot of trouble here … LOL! OOoo! I’d no idea we can post only every 60 secs… doesn’t anyone realize how much carnage can be missed in a bar fight in a minutes time!!! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776.md?page=21) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-bar-fight/27776.md?page=23)