# The Straight Dope House - The Duplex **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 18, 2001, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836 "2001-08-18T00:30:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/1 "2001-08-18T00:30:29Z")
Carried over from [The Straight Dope House](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=81496) Okay … carry on … [Edited by Eutychus55 on 08-17-2001 at 07:33 PM] ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/2 "2001-08-18T00:37:44Z")
It looks so lonely here… ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/3 "2001-08-18T00:42:50Z")
_YAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!_ _stretcccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhh_ \<\\> \<\\> ::clears eyes:: ::scratches self:: Mmmmmmm. Nice. :;scratches self again:: ::looks around, confused:: ::starts violently:: OH MY GAWD, I SLEPT THROUGH INTO A WHOLE NEW THREAD! ::runs into house:: ---
**Author:** ![Ross](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e274bd/32.png) [@Ross](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ross)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/4 "2001-08-18T00:57:07Z")
I’ve been sitting here all through the party quietly reading my Bible, like a good boy ought to. Nobody told me there was a party, but heck, that’s not the point. I’m happier out here all by myself. (barely hidden sob) Anyway I’ve been drinking Old Spice since 3am. (grins inanely) Come on baby, let’s BOOGIE! (makes idle grab at post-reader) (falls face-first onto floor) (dies underfoot) ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/5 "2001-08-18T01:11:05Z")
I think **Ross** is having flashbacks to house-sitting at **Coldfire** ’s house. ---
**Author:** ![AbbySthrnAccent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@AbbySthrnAccent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AbbySthrnAccent)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/6 "2001-08-18T01:14:22Z")
Our big old country house was renamed a little duplex. Why? ---
**Author:** ![eunoia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eunoia/32/97_2.png) [@eunoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eunoia)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/7 "2001-08-18T01:25:41Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by AbbySthrnAccent_ > I was a tiny bit worried as there are obviously so many more women than men planning to attend the event and I am greatly relieved to have a companion for the evening. I’ll be there later, but I have to set up the sound system for the dance. You just know that this formal deal’s gonna degenerate into Animal House 2001. It’s better to have more volume and not need it than need it and not have enough. Always thinking am I. TOGA! ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/8 "2001-08-18T01:34:34Z")
This House is no longer ours. I’ve nothing else to say here. Some threads run in excess of 20 pages. This one ran **six**. I’m so very sorry that I started something that got locked; my apologies to every single Member here who had previously enjoyed the idea of The Straight Dope House, and the other thread that I started. You all have fun with it. ☹ Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/9 "2001-08-18T01:36:46Z")
**Abby** , just the thread changed but not the magic. 🙂 I get all dressed up and do my hair…and there’s no one to dance with. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![DynoSaur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DynoSaur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DynoSaur)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/10 "2001-08-18T02:19:21Z")
All I’m gonna say is that there damned well better be a couch for me to crash on 😉 ---
**Author:** ![paperbackwriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@paperbackwriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paperbackwriter)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/11 "2001-08-18T03:01:07Z")
> [@](#): > > I get all dressed up and do my hair…and there’s no one to dance with. Damn! The one time my SO gets me into a tux and the party’s over! ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/12 "2001-08-18T03:03:42Z")
Hell no, **paperbackwriter**. It hasn’t even started yet! ---
**Author:** ![TubaDiva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tubadiva/32/507_2.png) [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/13 "2001-08-18T03:28:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cartooniverse \* > \*\*This House is no longer ours. I’ve nothing else to say here. > > Some threads run in excess of 20 pages. This one ran **six**. > > I’m so very sorry that I started something that got locked; my apologies to every single Member here who had previously enjoyed the idea of The Straight Dope House, and the other thread that I started. > > You all have fun with it. ☹ > Cartooniverse \*\* Get a grip, my dear, Euty SAVED that thread for you. Threads that are too long become difficult to load and become unusable. I bet you don’t want that. The old one links to the new one . . . the new one links to the old one . . . it’s the best we can do under the conditions that prevail. Sorry if it bummed you out. But it was necessary. your humble TubaDiva Administrator ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/14 "2001-08-18T03:38:26Z")
Wwell, I feel like dancing. Who’s up for a tango? Foxtrot, maybe? A waltz, perhaps. 'Course, everyone knows swing now, so if that’s all you’ve got, we can do that, too. ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/15 "2001-08-18T04:33:43Z")
I say after taking those pics of me, **thinksnow** , you owe me at least one dance. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/16 "2001-08-18T19:10:48Z")
…I think I was really hasty. That’s a polite word for **Cartooniverse** being a :wally: on too little sleep and disregard for **Euty** ’s attention to his job. A public apology to him, it did make sense and allows us all to slide back and forth with minimized freezing, between the two houses. The way I see it, it gives us MORE room for more Members. As Martha Stewart says, " That is a Good Thing". I’m so sorry I missed the dance. How’d it go? \ Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/17 "2001-08-18T19:21:17Z")
Note to Cartooniverse. I second what TubaDiva said. Please don’t leave us, Sweetie. ☹ You’re the life of the party here, and we wouldn’t have this lovely house if it hadn’t been for you. Back in the massage room, Pierre wakes celestina from the la-la land she’s been in due to his magical hands and indicates she has a call from Sophie. She takes the call. * * * Sophie said: “Ok, so the stylist says that I should probably wear something dark green. I disagree, homeboy. I need some sequins, I need a plunging neck line, I need backless and I need spaghetti straps. And I, of course, need some very high black heels. Jewelry? I’m not too good at jewelry. Maybe celestina could get her massaged butt in here and help me pick something out once she’s finished being worked over by Pierre (but please, don’t rush anything on my account. We’re here to enjoy ourselves).” * * * [giggle] Sophie & Ms. Bhaven, dears, come on up and let Pierre work his magic on you. He’s TRULY a godsend. I was just as stiff as I could be after spending the night sleepin’ in that rocker and then wrasslin’ with Krunk-y in the shower. 😉 Anyway, Sophie, as far as what you should wear and accessorize it with, if you’re going to go for sequins, I’m seeing you in a dark green satin dress with silver sequins on it. In the front forget the spagetti straps. It’s got long sleeves and covers you fully, but it’s form fitting, accentuating all those things fellas like in us ladies; however, the back has a plunging V scalloped out. As far as jewelry goes, since you’ve got sequins on, I’d say go for either plain silver dangling earrings OR earrings dripping with diamonds. The earrings will really accentuate your short finger waves and bring attention to the front and back of your dress. Oooh. Yeah. I’ll bet that works just beautifully. 🙂 But that’s just my two cents. If you want sequins and spagetti straps, I’d accessorize that with diamond stud earrings, and that’s it. Keep it simple. Meet me later for drinks and let me know what you’ve decided on. Oh dear. Now what in heaven’s name am I going to wear? celestina fumbles around in the salon trying to find something to wear. She finds a lovely pale pink silk, A-line, tea-length, strapless, sleeveless gown complete with matching three-quarter length gloves. She decides to accessorize it with black pumps, a black crocheted shawl, a pearl choker necklace, diamond and pearl stud earrings, and a diamond bracelet worn over the gloves. The stylist has done her hair up into a bun. Oh and thinksnow, Sweetie, I want a tango and a waltz from you. Dynosaur, get yourself all gussied up, Sugar. You owe me a waltz or two, and it’d be just lovely if you can do some swing too. Any of you fellas out there do Samba, Rumba, or Merengue? ---
**Author:** ![DynoSaur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DynoSaur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DynoSaur)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/18 "2001-08-18T19:39:30Z")
celestina, I’m willing to do any kind of dance you want. you just have to teach me, first 😉 and define ‘gussied up’, wouldya? ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/19 "2001-08-18T19:50:29Z")
DynoSaur, “gussied up” means get your tail in a tux and tails. As far as teaching you dances, I’ll do the best I can. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2001, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836/20 "2001-08-18T19:56:17Z")
For those of you wondering how we can now have not one but TWO Houses, please let me explain. One wanders down past the Steam Room near the woods. There, you find a narrow path, edged on both sides with perfectly sculpted hedges. Follow the path for about 300 yards, and through the thickets, you’ll find the Other House. Or, as they say, the \*\*Chalet aux Deux \*\*. More rooms ! More fun ! More food ( yes! ). [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dope-house-the-duplex/76836.md?page=2)