# The Straight Doper's Survivor **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 22, 2000, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191 "2000-06-22T14:58:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/321 "2000-07-18T17:01:35Z")
Ooooo…I do! Wanna see mine? Of course, the shirt’s gotta be off for that… _slides shirt off_ Better. Who wants to put suntan lotion on my back? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/322 "2000-07-18T17:29:38Z")
Swiddle’s Second Law of Nekkiditiy: Wherever Falcon goes, Nekkiditiy follows. ::ducks the flying guava:: ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/323 "2000-07-18T17:30:01Z")
::takes out the suntan lotion and rubs it all over **Falcons** back…:: Hey Falcon, you need to take some of those uncomfortable looking clothes off if you really want a good massage to. I’ve been told i give great a massage. You oughtta let me help loosen you up a bit… ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/324 "2000-07-18T17:48:33Z")
Swiddles? HUSH. _fwhap_ Moving on. You know, I do feel a bit tense… _takes off shorts and lays down_ How’s about that massage, hmmm? Please? ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/325 "2000-07-18T18:18:36Z")
Wow, a good hammock rest and a floor show. Forget Vegas, this is where the action is. And, as a bonus, my neon blue skin kinda makes the island feel like the Strip. Not to mention the gambling and alcohol. Now, where are those dancing girls? Swiddles? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/326 "2000-07-18T18:54:52Z")
You know I would, Mully, but I am nursing one fairly major guava-related head injury at the moment. I think you’re gonna have to provide your own “Bow chica mow-wow” soundtrack. I’ll be in my tree, unreachable by the normal human-propelled guava. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/327 "2000-07-18T18:56:04Z")
Hey, that head injury is YOUR fault. Making fun of me. Hmpf. ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/328 "2000-07-18T20:41:25Z")
…awwright ladies, no fighting. Swiddles, c’mon down here and i’ll give you a good rub as well. [ul] ::next: **soulsling** does tongue tricks. **Mully** ’s eyes turn yellow, **Falcon** starts a congo line and **Swiddles** tracks down **Mr.Cynical** s lair and yanks him out of his now leaking waterbed to join the party. Don’t miss the next episode of _Survivors on Cecil Island_:: [/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2000, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/329 "2000-07-18T20:50:57Z")
Tongue tricks??? SIGN ME UP! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2000, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/330 "2000-07-19T15:20:43Z")
Aw, man, and I was sleeping good! Now that I’m all nekkid, who wants to sit on my lap? ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2000, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/331 "2000-07-19T15:26:10Z")
_hops in Mr. C’s lap_ Hi there! _smooch_ ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2000, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/332 "2000-07-19T16:02:41Z")
Can’t you people keep it down? I was planning on sleeping at least until 2 and…HEY! Who the heck colored my hair green? And why am I wearing nothing but a conveniently placed seashell on a string? ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/333 "2000-07-20T12:53:12Z")
I will not let this island remain deserted, and I certainly don’t want to be ther person that kills this thread. C’mon people! I know we have lost Mr. C to the joys of fatherhood, but we can throw him a great big party when he comes back from the birthing tent. ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/334 "2000-07-20T13:05:13Z")
Sorry Mully, i was doing tongue tricks. Hard to speak up when my tongue is otherwise engaged. Swiddles, you up for that back rub yet? ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/335 "2000-07-20T15:21:22Z")
Good, God, yes. There is a knot over my shoulder blade that is the size of my fist. Where’s my friend Senor Cuervo? Jose? Oh, Joooooseeeeee… ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/336 "2000-07-20T18:37:17Z")
::rubs Swiddles shoulders and rubs oil on her back to start a massage…:: How’s that swiddles? Here, drink some of this Cuervo stuff, i’m not much for it… ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2000, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/337 "2000-07-22T05:06:03Z")
GEEZ. Can you say “hijack a post”? 😛 🙂 😉 ---
**Author:** ![soulsling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@soulsling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulsling)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2000, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/338 "2000-07-23T06:33:06Z")
**drainthelizard** , can you say ouch while we make you our next meal on the island? In honor of Mr.Cynicals new baby, we will feast on a special blend of drainthelizard and coconut meat accompanied by some smoked palm leaves and bananas. Maybe Swiddles and Falcon can dance for us as well? And Mully, you can provide the dew. ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2000, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/339 "2000-07-24T11:32:36Z")
All right, a meal of lizard accompanied by Dew. This is gonna be a good day after all. ---
**Author:** ![SwimmingRiddles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SwimmingRiddles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwimmingRiddles)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2000, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191/340 "2000-07-24T14:18:09Z")
In the name of the new Cyniggit, his pop and his mom! Let us feast! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-straight-dopers-survivor/23191.md?page=18)