# The Strangest Thread You've Seen On The Dope? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 12, 2008, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408 "2008-11-12T20:34:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/101 "2008-11-15T16:50:03Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I can’t find the stainless steel hooks thread! Does it still exist? Found it! Thread started on March 21, 2001: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=64354](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=64354) Actually, rereading it, maybe the thread itself is not so weird. Yes, the subject matter is a little disturbing, but in the best tradition of the SDMB, there is a serious discussion about apotemnophilia (the desire to be an amputee), and also some discussion about it possibly being a hoax perpetrated by a guy who had a thing for women who were amputees. An interesting look back, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/102 "2008-11-15T17:59:02Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Wasn’t there a thread or three last winter in which the OP was seriously considering having an affair? I seem to remember a moderate amount of crazy in that one. That would be this lovely thread… [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8439279](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8439279) and the related Pit thread… > **[Don't be proud of being a fucking bitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=415625)** > > In this thread, RSSchen has started crowing about how happy she is now that she’s cheating on her husband. As my feeling on this subject (and my new opinion of RSSchen) are not welcome in IMHO, I figure I should post them here. So here’s to you... Wherein **MizGrand** proceeded to crow about her affair with her local cop that her dimwitted husband would never find out about. She was chewed for her callous remarks and soon resorted to shouting “You just don’t understand!” into the ether. Eventually it came out that she had posted a ton of personal information to the board and that her husband would likely put the pieces together soon. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/103 "2008-11-15T20:36:20Z")
> [@Justin\_Bailey](#): > > That would be this lovely thread… > > [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8439279](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8439279) > > and the related Pit thread… > > [Don't be proud of being a fucking bitch - The BBQ Pit - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=415625) > > Wherein **MizGrand** proceeded to crow about her affair with her local cop that her dimwitted husband would never find out about. She was chewed for her callous remarks and soon resorted to shouting “You just don’t understand!” into the ether. > > Eventually it came out that she had posted a ton of personal information to the board and that her husband would likely put the pieces together soon. Oh yeah. That was about the maddest I’ve ever been on these boards (I even ended up Pitting her, too, for the bullshit name change, in my one and only Pit thread of another poster). ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/104 "2008-11-15T20:37:39Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Look, I’ve got a dancing cucumber and 2 pair of horns. I’ve got an Oscar Meyer weiner whistle. Besides which, when was the last time any of you started and posted in a NSFW picture thread? > ETA that’s two pair that mount on my head plus one wallmounted set I forgot. Seriously, dude, trying way too hard. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/105 "2008-11-15T22:48:07Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I think I joined because of very vaguely creepy, the thread–the original. Or at least it was one the first things that I posted in. That was also a strange thread. I liked it because it didn’t just have things like haunted houses or ESP or possible ghosts (not that those aren’t cool) but also things like random rubber gloves and **babies named Gary**. This has always freaked me out. Anyone got a link? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2008, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/106 "2008-11-15T22:49:26Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > Found it! Thread started on March 21, 2001: > > [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=64354](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=64354) > > Actually, rereading it, maybe the thread itself is not so weird. Yes, the subject matter is a little disturbing, but in the best tradition of the SDMB, there is a serious discussion about apotemnophilia (the desire to be an amputee), and also some discussion about it possibly being a hoax perpetrated by a guy who had a thing for women who were amputees. An interesting look back, anyway. Thanks! No matter what I do, it always takes me to only threads within the last two years, even when I select “any date”–what’s up with that? I think the weirdest part was the capital letters for the “DORRNANCE #5…” and so on–I always imagine someone saying that in a really low pitched guttural voice. Ugh! Anybody remember **Roland Deschaine**? He started a thread about swingers clubs for advice and ended up revealing that he first hooked up with his wife because he slept around a lot and ended up getting attached to her but admitted to being a sociopath, emotionally abusing her, said he’d threaten her with death if she tried to leave…and then got pissy in a pit thread when people talked about how his wife should RUN RUN RUN. (And brought up a lot of TMI like how he hated the smell of shit emanating from his John Thomas after anal.) ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/107 "2008-11-16T00:05:52Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Besides which, when was the last time any of you started and posted in a NSFW picture thread? What are you looking at me for? I posted in that thread with impunity! I think the weirdest thing I ever saw on the dope was the thread about [all men assumed to be child molesters](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=473948&highlight=scylla) and **Scylla** posting some very _very_ disturbing stuff regarding his views towards his daughter, how he basically owned her and she was his territory and anyone looking at her was threatening what was “his”. Oh, and how 7 year olds are sexual predators. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a thread take such a violent turn at the intersection of wrongness and disturbing. ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/108 "2008-11-16T01:19:54Z")
> [@FriarTed](#): > > Was the first thread the one where the Messiah/Second Coming of Jesus was the gay teen-age son of a (maybe) W-M executive? > > And to whoever is thinking it, the second thread is NOT mine! I had a different vision of Judgment Day. I was thinking it, but yours involved watching piss run down sinners legs, right? ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/109 "2008-11-16T02:00:27Z")
Not in the same categories as some of the weird mentioned here, but all this talk of prehensile foreskins makes me remember the [prehensile rectum](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=80957). The OP was pretty great (and the poster making the post was sane. Just with insane co-workers.), then we got a post in the spirit of Dr. Seuss!. For another compilation of great SDMB threads check out [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=346360) thread, too. ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/110 "2008-11-16T02:36:27Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I’m glad someone kept the link to this. > > I haven’t been able to find it, but someone startedasked for help with writing a report on “To Kill a Mockingbird.” We destroyed that book, including someone who stated that Boo & Dill became the founding members of the North American Man Boy Love Association. > > When the OP stated that the teacher was amazed to find that out, someone responded “What’s so surprising? Wasn’t Dill always trying to get Boo to come out”? That post made me laugh more than any one I’ve ever read on the entire Internet I agree that we need to find a link to this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/111 "2008-11-16T05:03:25Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Some posters seem to have a peterntatural fascination with semen. F’r instance [Why is my semen black and orange?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=286416) Incidentally, searching for semen + orange produces waaaay too many results :o 🆒 I seem to recall that later on he wondered why people were a little creeped out by him. > [@Boscibo](#): > > I’m partial to Homer’s [Monkey Butler](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=37864) thread. I really, REALLY wish **Homer** would come back. I miss him. ☹ IIRC, then **MizGrand** changed her name, thinking it would make her anonymous-only she was too stupid to realize it would change all of her previous posts as well. How about the guy [who liked the smell of his own farts](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=433112)? From one of our FAVORITE trolls (he’s banned, so I assume it’s save to refer to him as such): [Vaginal lubrication in prepubescent girls](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=466151) [What do people do with their miscarriages?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=458422) [How much does your feces weigh?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=452704) ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/112 "2008-11-16T17:40:20Z")
I slightly remember one about someone who was trying to get rid of gophers, and was basically getting really angry with them? It was meant to be funny, though, so may not fit in here so well. ---
**Author:** ![UnwrittenNocturne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/6de8d8/32.png) [@UnwrittenNocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UnwrittenNocturne)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/113 "2008-11-16T19:34:43Z")
I bring you the interesting mind of a poster called **Question**. This ( [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4411166](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4411166) )thread is an example and contains such gems as: - "- reality is non-local, seperate from time - our perception of time is the wavefunction collapsing - before the wavefunction collapses “what is” is a quantum state - long-term memories are determined by synaptic morphology . . so, since reality is unaffacted by time the only thing that prevents us from understanding existance in totality is our attachment to the perception of ourselves as something different from the energy that forms us and everything else. the past only exists because our minds are finely tuned machines that filter all of reality that has ever existed so that we can understand it based on who we are now. drugs, sleep, divine influence and many other things can interfere with this process and allow some information through that isn’t totally relevent to our current incarnation but is nontheless related, past lives included. . . our subconscious that exists in a quantum state analyzes the information and transmits it to the rest of the brain, triggering whatever process that alters the shape of our synapses to form long term memories."\* ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/114 "2008-11-16T19:55:50Z")
> [@Love\_Rhombus](#): > > I slightly remember one about someone who was trying to get rid of gophers, and was basically getting really angry with them? It was meant to be funny, though, so may not fit in here so well. That was a **Scylla** thread. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/115 "2008-11-16T21:21:48Z")
> [@askeptic](#): > > I was thinking it, but yours involved watching piss run down sinners legs, right? Well, only a subset IIRC - those sinners who liked to blow hard about how if there _WAS_ a God and they ever _MET_ him, then by gosh and by golly they were going to kick him inna fork. :rolleyes: And the good Friar did opine that after the celestial pantmessing it would all end in tears, contrition, and forgiveness. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/116 "2008-11-16T21:27:29Z")
**Hallucinating Homer** is one of my favourite threads so far! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/117 "2008-11-16T22:16:52Z")
This one was pretty wild: > **[I wish our species would stop with the bullshit](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=431638)** > > I’m sick of tired of the bullshit hopes our pathetic species clings to to get by in this hopeless universe. Religion/supernaturalism: so much nonsensical bullshit. I am so pissed that I have to be part of a species where 90% of ‘adults’ in the world... Some 13 year old blabbers on about the whole world is full of pain and suffering and that the universe would be better off if all of humanity agreed to stop making babies so the human race would all go extinct. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2008, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/118 "2008-11-16T22:32:25Z")
> [@Justin\_Bailey](#): > > This one was pretty wild: > > [I wish our species would stop with the bullshit - The BBQ Pit - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=431638) > > Some 13 year old blabbers on about the whole world is full of pain and suffering and that the universe would be better off if all of humanity agreed to stop making babies so the human race would all go extinct. Oh man, I missed that one. This is the best part: [QUOTE=Linty Fresh] Man, I didn’t know Der Trihs had a kid brother. Their mom’s basement must be huge. [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![SecretPanda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bcef8e/32.png) [@SecretPanda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretPanda)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/119 "2008-11-17T17:15:17Z")
Hello! This thread (the one you’re reading!) made me de-lurk and become a member. So it’s all your fault!!! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2008, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408/120 "2008-11-17T17:55:15Z")
Hunh. Not so secret any longer, my Panda friend. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-strangest-thread-youve-seen-on-the-dope/472408.md?page=7)