# The Surprise! MMP **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [February 11, 2013, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946 "2013-02-11T05:49:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/181 "2013-02-13T17:10:51Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > But weren’t your EMS??? I was both in NC. MD, just EMS. ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/182 "2013-02-13T17:32:46Z")
Got into work and checked on the laptop I started encrypting yesterday. Everyone in my department hates the encryption software with a passion, because it f\*cks things up. At first, we were told we could shut down or restart any time during the encryption (which takes HOURS), but we shouldn’t allow the machine to go to sleep during the first 5%. Then we couldn’t let it go to sleep while it was encrypting, period. So, when I first rolled out this laptop, I figured it was good. But NO, it turns out that if it gets shut down AT ALL while encrypting, it can fubar the video output through the dock. So, I had to completely wipe the hard drive, reinstall everything and configure it for the user. I left it running the encryption overnight so it would be finished when I came in this morning. Sometime after I left yesterday, some hamster fouling troglodyte did a force shut down on the damn laptop. I can’t even find out if it’ll work until it’s done encrypting and I can test it on the dock. (However, my loud cursing did seem to amuse my boss.) ---
**Author:** ![janis\_and\_c0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janis_and_c0/32/21_2.png) [@janis\_and\_c0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/janis_and_c0)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/183 "2013-02-13T17:54:24Z")
WEWT!!! Max & Erma’s for lunch!! ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/184 "2013-02-13T18:38:14Z")
[QUOTE=phouka] Everyone in my department hates the encryption software with a passion, because it f\*cks things up. [/QUOTE] What are you using? We’ve got Pointsec / Check Point on all user devices here, and once you’re past the initial encryption, it doesn’t put a huge load on the PC. I do know that it makes repairing a non-booting PC impossible. A couple of years ago, one of the config files on mine was mis-configured, and unless you can get to the Windows desktop, it’s impossible to boot with a CD or use any of the traditional repair console tools. Unencrypted, the fix would have been trivial, but instead, I was out of service for two days while my PC was reimaged and re-encrypted. [QUOTE=VunderBob] The counterpart to “prober”… [/QUOTE] Just be glad you’re not an unlucky probie truckie in Truckee\*. I hear their initiation involves one goat, a llama and two squid. :eek: - I used to work with a guy who just could not believe there was a place called [Truckee](http://www.townoftruckee.com/). This was pre-Web, but I threatened to rent a car and drive him there, at which point he was like “Well, OK, maybe it exists.” ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/185 "2013-02-13T18:47:54Z")
I got my coworkers little valentine’s day presents. Tiny ones. I felt no obligation to do this but they are always so nice, bringing in home baked treats and such, that I wanted to do something back. Blurf. I don’t think I will make it through this afternoon without another cup of coffee. I promise not to throw this one all over the floor. ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/186 "2013-02-13T18:53:20Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I got my coworkers little valentine’s day presents. Tiny ones. I felt no obligation to do this but they are always so nice, bringing in home baked treats and such, that I wanted to do something back. All-female office, IIRC? 'Cos otherwise it could get weird… 😃 > [@](#): > > Blurf. I don’t think I will make it through this afternoon without another cup of coffee. I promise not to throw this one all over the floor. it’s OK. We’ll understand that it was an accident… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/187 "2013-02-13T18:56:40Z")
> [@Noone\_Special](#): > > All-female office, IIRC? 'Cos otherwise it could get weird… 😃 All females. I hadn’t really thought about if there was one man. I think I’d give him a gift if he was my boss or my underling; but not a peer, I guess, and I’d do it for everyone so it wouldn’t get weird. I have a pretty iron-clad rule against dating at the office, anyway, so it’s not like it would ever go anywhere. I’ve never broken it, not even when I wanted to. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/188 "2013-02-13T19:46:17Z")
Here is my question for the day. There is a place at the mall that sells all Irish stuff, all the time. How do they survive??? ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/189 "2013-02-13T19:52:16Z")
There is a boon in late February/early March - enough to carry them the rest of the fiscal year. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/190 "2013-02-13T19:53:07Z")
**’Mika** all the little Leprechauns all around have to buy their tp from somewhere! 😃 What do they sell? Soap? Whiskey? Potatoes? Guiness? Linens? Corned beef and cabbage? Yay for bein’ all nice with the \VD\ presents. I’m sure everyone appreciates it. ‘Tis Ash Wednesday so I shall go get ashed this evenin’ over to the church house. Since they were just made last night I know the ashes are good and fresh. What? If’n YP is gonna smear ashes on my forehead, I expect fresh ashes. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/191 "2013-02-13T19:58:37Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > **'Mika** all the little Leprechauns all around have to buy their tp from somewhere! 😃 What do they sell? Soap? Whiskey? Potatoes? Guiness? Linens? Corned beef and cabbage? Yay for bein’ all nice with the \VD\ presents. I’m sure everyone appreciates it. > > ‘Tis Ash Wednesday so I shall go get ashed this evenin’ over to the church house. Since they were just made last night I know the ashes are good and fresh. What? If’n YP is gonna smear ashes on my forehead, I expect fresh ashes. Soap and shamrocks and lots and lots of Irish themed wear. If they sold corned beef and cabbage I might be there in line. It’s funny how you guys have Ash Wednesday…and Hindus have a rite, too, where they have ashes, called vibuthi. When I was staying with my aunts, they had me put a pinch of ashes on my forehead, nose, and tongue. The ashes were supposedly the dead cremains of Shirdi Sai Baba. Ick. And how many cremains does this fellow have, anyway? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/192 "2013-02-13T19:59:57Z")
hang on a minit, **swampy** , you got a smudge on yer for’ead.\* ::wipe wipe wipe::\* Much better \ ---
**Author:** ![Jynxster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d07c76/32.png) [@Jynxster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jynxster)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/193 "2013-02-13T20:28:59Z")
I may or maynot be guilty of stapler-cide. In my defense it bit me first and I have the bloody scratch to prove it. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/194 "2013-02-13T20:32:03Z")
Do people generally give any sort of donations when they get that smudge of ashes? Just wondering as I’ve got a dirty fireplace and a dirty barbecue, and we’re really going to need a way to make up for all the lost time and pay when DH is getting zapped. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/195 "2013-02-13T20:38:21Z")
> [@Jynxster](#): > > I may or maynot be guilty of stapler-cide. In my defense it bit me first and I have the bloody scratch to prove it. Did you kill the red Swingline? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/196 "2013-02-13T21:08:02Z")
> [@anyrose](#): > > hang on a minit, **swampy** , you got a smudge on yer for’ead.\* ::wipe wipe wipe::\* Much better \ Did you use spit!?! Was that SPIT on your kleenex? ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/197 "2013-02-13T21:15:26Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Did you use spit!?! > Was that SPIT on your kleenex? _of course not!_ I dipped the kleenex in my gin & tonic! ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/198 "2013-02-13T21:20:44Z")
> [@anyrose](#): > > Don’t ask me why I reemmber crap like this but today is the borthday of two of my ex boyfriends Today is the birthday of one of my ex’s. My boot in his nether regions would be my gift to him today. This would be the one I’m actively hostile to. (One I’m still friends with and the other I’m indifferent towards. Collect the whole set!) I should take a walk or something today, but my feet still hurt from yesterday. I’m going to spend the afternoon scheduling. Envy my thrilling life. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/199 "2013-02-13T21:21:33Z")
> [@SpazCat](#): > > My boot in his nether regions would be my gift to him today. **This would be the one I’m actively hostile to**. (bolding mine) No, really? I just thought you did that for all your friends. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946/200 "2013-02-13T21:26:48Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > (bolding mine) No, really? I just thought you did that for all your friends. 😃 I should have specified frontal nether regions. On a guy. If I like you it’s a swat with a broom on the hind end. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-surprise-mmp/649946.md?page=11)