# The Third Condiment - what should it be? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** food-cooking\ **Created:** [June 25, 2023, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091 "2023-06-25T19:48:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/81 "2023-06-27T17:17:12Z")
“ **Condiment Emily, Condiment not Continent**!” Emily Litella: “Nevermind.” ---
**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/82 "2023-06-27T17:29:33Z")
Condom mints? Why? ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/83 "2023-06-27T18:09:57Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > _ **The Third Condiment** _ works well as a title, really drawing my interest. A novella by Stephen King? Gruesome. A mystery by Agatha Christie? [**SNIP**] Stop right there! I love this - it’s obviously an Agatha Christie murder mystery - how did I not see that? The body of Lord Porterhouse is slumped across the dining table - poisoned. And the third condiment is missing! j ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/84 "2023-06-27T18:29:10Z")
> [@DSeid](#): > > Condom mints? Why? Ever tasted one? Then you would know, or so I’ve been told. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/85 "2023-06-27T18:49:54Z")
> [@DSeid](#): > > Condom mints? Why? To accompany these, of course. > **[Amazon.com: Candy Prints Super Fun Penis Candy (Ea) : Health & Household](https://www.amazon.com/Super-Fun-Penis-Candy-100pcs/dp/B001RALEK2)** > > Super Fun Penis Candy in fun fruit flavors. Delicious, tart fruit flavored, mini candy penises are more fun than a person should have! These charming fellas come in a 3 ounces package that contains 100 pieces. Bagged tiny candy penises. Fill a bowl... ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2023, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/86 "2023-06-27T19:03:44Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > There used to be a deli near me that always had a jar of kosher dill pickles on every table. Loved that place. Every deli I used to go to always had kosher dills on the table. If not on the table when you were seated, they were brought over asap after seating. Junior’s on Westwood Blvd used to bring a bowl full to the table. They were house made, so they weren’t bottled. One time when it was crazy busy our order took a long time to come, and we must have gone through five bowls of pickles. I think the busboy was flirting with us though. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2023, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/87 "2023-06-28T10:27:51Z")
> **[The Third Condiment](https://www.festmag.com/edinburgh/archive/the-third-condiment)** > > ★★★★ Judging by this new work from brothers Ben and Charlie Brafman, I’m not the only one having serious doubts over green ethics and fair-trade capi... ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2023, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/88 "2023-06-28T12:37:28Z")
Neat find - very good. It’s not Agatha, but it’ll do until Agatha comes along… j ---
**Author:** ![Retzbu\_Tox](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/retzbu_tox/32/11829_2.png) [@Retzbu\_Tox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Retzbu_Tox)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/89 "2023-06-29T02:12:17Z")
Tajin - One of my daughter’s friends made street corn for us, with Tajin on it. A new favorite thing for me. [![](https://www.tajin.com/us/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Clasico-142g_1-127x300.png) ](https://www.tajin.com/us/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Clasico-142g_1-127x300.png) ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/90 "2023-06-29T09:33:50Z")
At my table, it’s salt, pepper and smoked paprika for dry. And it’s EVOO, balsamic and _garum_ for wets. > [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > the third is forgotten to time, possibly cinnamon or any number of other things Victorian? The third’s obviously for the cocaine. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/91 "2023-06-29T10:29:56Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Victorian? The third’s obviously for the cocaine. They were the best of times… ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/92 "2023-06-29T18:33:25Z")
[Bitchin’ Sauce](https://www.epicurious.com/expert-advice/this-nut-based-dip-made-me-forget-about-ranch-article) (the chipotle flavor) is the condiment that belongs on the tables of all eateries. It goes well with everything. The seasoning that should stand between salt and pepper on tables is garlic powder (or salt). Garlic is divine. ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/93 "2023-06-29T22:16:17Z")
Just what was I going to mention, others for third and fourth for me are Worcestershire sauce and this weird but tasty concoction: [MayoMust](https://www.walmart.com/ip/Heinz-Mayomust-Mayonnaise-Mustard-Sauce-19-fl-oz-Bottle/861743813) ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/94 "2023-06-29T22:21:16Z")
> [@Treppenwitz](#): > > Let’s just say: what should sit alongside salt and pepper? Before I read any further I’ll state my choice: Garlic Powder. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2023, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/95 "2023-06-29T22:31:57Z")
> [@GIGObuster](#): > > Just what was I going to mention, others for third and fourth for me are Worcestershire sauce and this weird but tasty concoction: > > [MayoMust](https://www.walmart.com/ip/Heinz-Mayomust-Mayonnaise-Mustard-Sauce-19-fl-oz-Bottle/861743813) When I was a kid the cafeteria at school made _all_ their hamburgers and cold sandwiches with this nasty substance we christened _Mustaise_. It was some premixed goop which seemed to be about 2/3rds cheap mayo and 1/3rd cheap bright yellow mustard. They applied it liberally to all the bread before assembling the sandwiches backstage. Given that I despise mustard and always have, this rendered about 2/3rds of their weekly output inedible to me. What was left was pretty much canned green beans and the occasional apple. Shudder. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2023, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/96 "2023-06-30T00:26:08Z")
What about Pepsi Infused Ketchup? > **[Pepsi introduces Colachup, a ketchup infused with cola](https://www.nbcnews.com/business/pepsi-colachup-ketchup-infused-cola-rcna91875)** > > People on Twitter had some strong reactions to the new offering, with many giving the seal of approval. Coming soon- Dr. Pepper infused pepper and Mountain Dew Mustard. 😄 ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2023, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/97 "2023-06-30T00:54:13Z")
Take any ordinary condiment. Add sugar. It’ll sell better. Sriracha is mostly sugar syrup with some heat / garlic added. It sells great. Why? Because Americans love sugar more than life itself. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2023, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091/98 "2023-06-30T12:15:34Z")
While true, if you’ve had actual Thai sriracha such as Sriraja Panich or Grand Mountain, they’re even sweeter (about 26g total carbs per 100mg for Sriraja Panich vs 16g for Huy Fong.) So this is a case where the original has more sugar than the American counterpart. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-third-condiment-what-should-it-be/986091.md?page=4)