# The time is coming. Join while you can. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 21, 2001, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632 "2001-11-21T18:46:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/61 "2001-11-23T00:29:47Z")
I want something to do. I’m sure you’re wise enough to come up with something for me, oh esteemed **Kwyjibo**. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/62 "2001-11-23T01:18:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GingerOfTheNorth \* > \*\*I want something to do. I’m sure you’re wise enough to come up with something for me, oh esteemed **Kwyjibo**. \*\* I think “Empress” would work. (With your very own skull encrusted throne.) ---
**Author:** ![Nymaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d9b06d/32.png) [@Nymaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymaz)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/63 "2001-11-23T03:27:36Z")
Oooh, oooh, can I be Lord High Ironic Executioner? Bringing entertainment to justice! And **Opengrave** , we need to coordinate my new TV show, _When Animals Attack Reality TV Show Producers_. > [@](#): > > **Kwyjibo** > _Note to self: > Before you dominate the world, LEARN YOUR STAFF MEMBERS GENDER!_ The right uniform will take care of that… hint, hint, metal bikinis… Er, for the women that is, last time I wore a metal speedo I didn’t hear the end of it… :o ---
**Author:** ![zoogirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b9bd4f/32.png) [@zoogirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoogirl)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/64 "2001-11-23T06:03:13Z")
Hey, can I be Head Zookeeper? Ya gotta have a Zoo! I’ll even tend the catnip patch for Cougarfang, and Bobkitty if she shows up! I’m not too sure about cat-boxes though… ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/65 "2001-11-23T14:02:40Z")
Done and done. Nymaz, good call on the uniforms! From this day forward, female uniforms will consist of black leather or spandex. 😉 (With form fitting metal plating for combat.) ZooGirl, the job is yours. You have permision to steal…er…aquire exotic animals from other zoo’s around teh world. ---
**Author:** ![Purd\_Werfect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47c2d/32.png) [@Purd\_Werfect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purd_Werfect)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/66 "2001-11-23T14:17:42Z")
Any position that I might have wanted is filled, so I’m joining the Resistance. I always fit in better with the downtrodden anyway. [Apu] See you in hell! [/Apu] ---
**Author:** ![Cougarfang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c67d28/32.png) [@Cougarfang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cougarfang)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2001, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/67 "2001-11-23T14:23:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rye \* > \*\*If cats don’t have opposable thumbs, how do they hold and fire ray guns? \*\* exactly the same way we type 😃 ooh, zooey’s got the catnip! zooey’s got the catnip! [sub]psst… Bobkitty… wanna pull off another “cocktail party”? :D[/sub] _ducks_ ---
**Author:** ![zoogirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b9bd4f/32.png) [@zoogirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoogirl)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2001, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/68 "2001-11-24T06:16:16Z")
Yup, but I think its a different strain this time. (I HOPE it’s a different strain! Some people just can’t handle the good stuff, if you know what I mean! I’m STILL trying to dry out my tight jeans!) Anyway, thanks, and I’ll take leather please. (zoogirl throws a couple of cages in back of the car and heads off in the direction of the local rival zoo. Which should be closed by now…) ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2001, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/69 "2001-11-24T07:29:29Z")
Ya know, **Kwyjibo** , I was with you until you explained your theory about sports tonight. I’m afraid that the Cabal will have to reveal themselves and not let you form your figurehead government. Sigh. I hate to do this, you realize, but football and basketball must stay. I’d even be willing to let you keep the soccer, but I need something to keep me sane on Sundays. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2001, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/70 "2001-11-24T15:21:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cerowyn \* > \*\*Ya know, **Kwyjibo** , I was with you until you explained your theory about sports tonight. I’m afraid that the Cabal will have to reveal themselves and not let you form your figurehead government. Sigh. > > I hate to do this, you realize, but football and basketball must stay. I’d even be willing to let you keep the soccer, but I need something to keep me sane on Sundays. > > Sorry. \*\* Hey, I couldn’t go through a night without rustling someones feathers. 😉 The sports stay. (I honestly had no plans on taking them away. 🙂 ) Oh, and you’ve just been put in charge for arming our police force with the paint ball guns. **Minister of Arms** is you will. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Nausicaa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@Nausicaa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nausicaa)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/71 "2001-11-26T13:17:18Z")
Yippie! I get to be the Minister of Forced Labor! (rubbing hands together with glee) So much to do, so little time. ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/72 "2001-11-26T17:08:25Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by AtomicBanana_\*\* > Hmmm, how about the position of ‘Prime Minister of Supermodel Bathing and of the Tucking in Jessica Alba at Night’? \*\* Well, if you want to tuck Jessica Alba in, that’ll be okay, but just so you know: she’ll be in _my_ harem suite, and the only other guys allowed in are the eunuchs. But hey, it’s your choice. Oh, and the same goes for Colleen Haskell and Sandra Bullock. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/73 "2001-11-26T20:55:00Z")
Is there gonna be an organized state religion? If so I want to be Chief High Right Reverand His Holiness Keeper of the Faith. Maybe it could be Emperor worship. I could write the liturgy. Something like… A rose is a flower A ruby is a jewel All Hail the Emperor! We think he’s cool. See, I’d be really good at it. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/74 "2001-11-26T21:56:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by swampbear \* > \*\*Is there gonna be an organized state religion? If so I want to be Chief High Right Reverand His Holiness Keeper of the Faith. Maybe it could be Emperor worship. I could write the liturgy. Something like… > > A rose is a flower > A ruby is a jewel > All Hail the Emperor! > We think he’s cool. > > See, I’d be really good at it. \*\* No, there will be no state religion. (Being an athiest, well, ya know…😉 ) but religion will not be oppressed in any way. Practice any religion you want. Emperor Worship would go ovetr very well. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Moon-Watcher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/49beb7/32.png) [@Moon-Watcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moon-Watcher)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2001, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/75 "2001-11-26T22:12:31Z")
You’ll need a military, specifically a navy. I think **Lord of the Sea** has a nice ring to it. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/76 "2001-11-27T01:09:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Triton \* > \*\*You’ll need a military, specifically a navy. I think **Lord of the Sea** has a nice ring to it. \*\* That we will. You’ve got the job. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/77 "2001-11-27T01:49:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kwyjibo \* > \*\*Oh, and you’ve just been put in charge for arming our police force with the paint ball guns. **Minister of Arms** is you will. 😃 \*\* Hmmm… guess I’ll have to get going on the legend, then, shouldn’t I? And what’s the meaning of giving away Lord of the Sea when you already knew a real, live Navy-type person? ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/78 "2001-11-27T02:01:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cerowyn \* > \*\*And what’s the meaning of giving away Lord of the Sea when you already knew a real, live Navy-type person? \*\* Umm…good point. But it is a “First Come First Serve” sort of thing. (I didn’t now that it was the Navy you were in…☹ ) ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/79 "2001-11-27T02:06:50Z")
[sub]I know I’m gonna hear about this later, but…[/sub] Cerowyn, **Minster of Naval Affairs** is yours. Sorry Triton, but I know for a fact C-Man is qualified. (And he has some great enforcement ideas.) I’m sure Cerowyn would have you work at his side. (Hey, no one said being in charge was going to be easy.) ---
**Author:** ![Moon-Watcher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/49beb7/32.png) [@Moon-Watcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moon-Watcher)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2001, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632/80 "2001-11-27T05:01:54Z")
I would be honored to. I still wish to retain my title, however. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-time-is-coming-join-while-you-can/94632.md?page=5)