# The TMI Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 2, 2000, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423 "2000-11-02T19:06:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/161 "2000-11-11T17:25:01Z")
> [@](#): > > I performed anallingus on a Golden Retriever. _doesn’t bat an eyelash_ _Analingus_ has one L, dear. > [@](#): > > I had absolutely NO idea men stuck things up their butt. Lots of straight men engage in anal pleasure, and why shouldn’t they? Straight butts have the same nerves gay butts have, which happen to be the same kinds of nerves found in the penis. The anus is definitely an erogenous zone. > [@](#): > > this puerile green pus keeps oozing from my dick _still not batting an eyelash_ You mean _purulent_, dear. Puerile means childish. > [@](#): > > I have caught my father looking at gay porn. “Kids, where’s your father?” “Upstairs, jacking off to gay porn.” “Again?” -_Brain Candy_ ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/162 "2000-11-11T17:26:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by PurePhreak \* > \*\*I was having a pretty bad daay but now that i’ve gone through this thread and laughed at all the dummass things you people have done i now feel much better thanks for being the funniest group of ridicously gross people and brightining up my day > > -PurePhreak \*\* Teacher! Teacher! S/He broke the rules! S/he didn’t post anything TMI! I’m telling! ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/163 "2000-11-11T19:00:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tzel \* > \*\*And since someone brought up anal insertion, here’s everything I can ever remember sticking up my ass in wierd masturbation practices: > > \ > > A big fat marker, with a lubricated condom on it. (Getting sophisticated here. This was real fun. In fact, I actually gave this marker away to a friend later on. I figured since there was a condom on it, it hadn’t really touched my rectum and was therefore okay. Hell, I still used it. Why not?) > \*\* > [@](#): > > _originally posted by Homer_ > \*\*I used to shave my pubes because it felt better when I masturbated. I stopped because I was worried if, by chance, I ever got laid, they’d think I was a freak. > \*\* I’ve never laughed so hard in my life. I think it takes a certain genius to do things like this to yourself, and serious mental problems to admit them online. Of course, I am no better. So… I was once trimming my pubic hair with a pair of VERY sharp scissors, and got the skin of my scrotum caught in the blades. I use an electric razor to do this now. I let my dog lick me on the mouth when I was a kid. I didn’t think it was a big deal until my Mom saw it once and got grossed out. When I was 12 I got Athletes Foot. Not just a little itching and burning, this stuff literally bored HOLES into the flesh of my toes so large, I was able to insert tweezers half an inch into myself. I pulled out some black, infected junk with those tweezers. 4 years ago when I was still living in my old college dorm, I had diarrea in the shower. It was so thin I was able to get most of it down the drain. I saw a dead deer by the road once that had been rotting for about 2 weeks. The maggots in it’s body cavity formed a seething mass that was actually strong enough to move around what was left of the animals internal organs. I once stepped on a dead and bloated rat on the beach, with my bare feet. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/164 "2000-11-11T19:26:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lizard \* > \*\*I was once trimming my pubic hair with a pair of VERY sharp scissors, and got the skin of my scrotum caught in the blades. I use an electric razor to do this now. > > I let my dog lick me on the mouth when I was a kid. I didn’t think it was a big deal until my Mom saw it once and got grossed out.\*\* 1. OWWWWWWW! Got the wind knocked out of me on that one, Lizard. 2. My dogs still do this. One likes to lick inside my ears on occasion. I had a neighbor whose dog loved to play in my hair. (Hey hey . . not THAT hair). ---
**Author:** ![UrbanShocker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/eb9ed0/32.png) [@UrbanShocker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanShocker)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/165 "2000-11-11T20:39:53Z")
Anyone who has a penis, please don’t read this post. Thank you. When my friend Chris was eight, he crashed his bike and fell off, and somehow a piece of metal got caught on his dick. Sliced it right open, like _that_. He didn’t even know he was hurt until he looked down. What he didn’t find out until a few months ago was that he **almost lost the head, and they had to stitch it back on**. Incidentally, the way he learned about that last little detail was by overhearing his mom tell his brother’s fiancée the story. I once masturbated nine times in one day (from morning to night, not in a 24-hour period), just to see if I could do it. I could. But man, was I sore afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2000, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/166 "2000-11-11T21:09:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by UrbanShocker \* > \*\*I once masturbated nine times in one day (from morning to night, not in a 24-hour period), just to see if I could do it. I could. But man, was I sore afterwards. \*\* I’ve always wanted to go for a personal record to see how many times I can get myself off. One time I did do a couple little virility tests. I tried to see if I could jack off for an hour straight without having an orgasm (I actually went a little longer, like 1:09 or so, but I just got sick of it. I probably could have kept going because the mental tricks were working well, but I just decided to go for it. Fucking great orgasm though.) Then I saw how quickly I could get erect and have another orgasm. I was erect in about 11 minutes and orgasmed a few minutes later. I was pretty proud of myself. Add to the list of things inserted in my anus: A candle, with a lubricated condom. Jeezus, I’ll never get laid if I keep wasting my condoms on makeshift dildos. ---
**Author:** ![fnord1966](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ad7895/32.png) [@fnord1966](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fnord1966)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/167 "2000-11-12T06:16:14Z")
Wow! That was some very disturbing shit. I feel so _NORMAL_ I think I am going to have nightmares now, thanks a lot. I have nothing to even come close to even the least disgusting thing here. I must say though, I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time. ---
**Author:** ![Ender\_s\_Gameboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Ender\_s\_Gameboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ender_s_Gameboy)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/168 "2000-11-12T12:44:18Z")
I had sex in a cinema the other day but in truth it was only because a friend had done it recently and he made it sound good. And it was. ---
**Author:** ![hypergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/49beb7/32.png) [@hypergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hypergirl)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/169 "2000-11-12T18:04:25Z")
If you want to talk about weird places you have done sexual things…Just this Wednesday night I gave my boyfriend head in the sanctuary of our synagogue. I have also done interesting things in movie theaters, swimming pools, etc. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/170 "2000-11-12T19:18:50Z")
Hmm… never did anything sexual with an animal (unless you count having gotten an erection when my cat jumped on my lap… but that wasn’t entirely the cat’s fault :D). What other nifty goodies can I post… oh, okay: I once tied up my best friend immediately prior to her boyfriend having sex with her. They both let me watch, too… and I held her legs 😃 The funniest thing is that I learned the knots to tie her up with in the Boy Scouts (one of the few things I took away from that organization). My best rate for masturbation was about three times in an hour (give or take ten minutes or so). I, too, was sore afterwards. Ooh, how’s this one… it’s recent: Just last week, I had a conversation with a friend where I pondered what it was like for my parents to have sex. Since they were both Mormon, I theorized that they were both screaming, “Procreation! Procreation! We’re making a baby, a baby to glorify God! Procreation!” and the like. Needless to say, others who were in the vicinity were rather disgusted. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/171 "2000-11-12T19:30:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SPOOFE Bo Diddly \* > \*\*Hmm… never did anything sexual with an animal (unless you count having gotten an erection when my cat jumped on my lap… but that wasn’t entirely the cat’s fault :D). > > \*\* Any pussy at all turns you on, huh? ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/172 "2000-11-12T19:42:49Z")
This thread has gotten kinda lame . . . I keep having to pick my ass to get lint out of it. A few times a day usually does it. There. That was TMI. ---
**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/173 "2000-11-12T21:02:07Z")
More TMI? I have on a pair of days of the week panties. The whole set is rodeo-themed; today I have on Siesta Sunday with a sparkly cowgirl sleeping. They were a gag present, but I really liked them so I still wear them all. ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/174 "2000-11-12T21:28:14Z")
I shot a man in self defense. It was a robbery attempt in Tanzania and the man next to me was shot in the head and killed instantly. I have a small scar from a piece of his skull hitting my wrist. Two other people were injured in the group I was in before I was able to stop him. I took about 20 seconds but I have spent months going over every aspect of that brief moment. ---
**Author:** ![Welfy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e56c9b/32.png) [@Welfy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Welfy)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2000, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/175 "2000-11-12T21:32:28Z")
I almost never brush my teeth. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2000, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/176 "2000-11-13T00:40:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MikeG \* > \*\*I shot a man in self defense. It was a robbery attempt in Tanzania and the man next to me was shot in the head and killed instantly. I have a small scar from a piece of his skull hitting my wrist. Two other people were injured in the group I was in before I was able to stop him. I took about 20 seconds but I have spent months going over every aspect of that brief moment. \*\* More details please?!? ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2000, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/177 "2000-11-13T01:53:54Z")
No. I’m sorry I posted this, It wasn’t meant for general knowledge, I realized this after actually typing it out and I hit submit instead of clear. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2000, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/178 "2000-11-13T03:30:38Z")
Mike, contact the admins, and they’ll remove the post for you. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2000, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/179 "2000-11-13T04:08:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Welfy \* > \*\*I almost never brush my teeth. \*\* Welcome to the club. Although, as I don’t have an SO, that’s not an issue. A few days ago I was combing my hair and great big clumps of it came out. I think that happens when I don’t shower often enough. Split ends and all . . . ---
**Author:** ![fnord1966](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ad7895/32.png) [@fnord1966](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fnord1966)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2000, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423/180 "2000-11-13T06:31:15Z")
I have discovered the one way I can beat every last one of you all, but I am not willing to actually perform this task to truthfully tell everyone, that yes, I did Feltch a dead goat. I have not, nor will I ever, but I belive that it would take the cake, _ **UNLESS…** _ someone had actually comitted an act of munging. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tmi-thread/39423.md?page=10)