# The Torgo Game for MST3K fans

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [October 31, 2001, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665 "2001-10-31T05:13:02Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 9\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\
**Post date:** [October 31, 2001, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/21 "2001-10-31T22:48:28Z")

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“Hello, Cleveland… I am Torgo… are you ready to… rock?”

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**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/22 "2001-11-01T02:05:23Z")

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And now getting ready to mount the balance beam…Torgo.

“I’m Torgo, and I’ll b-b-be piercing your nip-p-ple.”

When you need to artificially inseminate the cow, just dial 555 GOTORGO for your semen collecting needs.

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**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/23 "2001-11-01T02:35:07Z")

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M-m-my n-name is Torgo, a-and I m-move y-your v-valuables i-into your n-new house.

I-i am N-nurse Torgo, h-hold s-still for your I-V.

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**Author:** ![edwino](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@edwino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/edwino)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/24 "2001-11-01T03:33:50Z")

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Torgovitz the Mohel.

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**Author:** ![goonhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ebca7d/32.png) [@goonhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goonhead)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/25 "2001-11-01T03:56:21Z")

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I’m…Dr. …Torgo…lay back f-f-f-for…your n-n-novocaine shot

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**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/26 "2001-11-01T04:00:56Z")

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(I’ll do this in the old typing style some people used for Torgo.)

I aM ToRGo. I wIlL pErForM yOuR hEaRt ByPasS wHiLe tHe MaSTeR iS AWay. PlEaSe ReLax fOR tHe aNesTHesiOlOGiSt.

(I used to love stuff like this while I was on the MST3K board at [scifi.com](http://scifi.com). Good wishes to all my old BBoard friends, wherever you may be.)

-Brianjedi

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**Author:** ![Miss\_Creant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@Miss\_Creant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Creant)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/27 "2001-11-01T04:05:01Z")

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Torgo…tattoo artist…my Master says that…I…I…I.  
c-c-can…d-d-draw…whatever…I…I…w-w-wh-wha-want…

h-h-hold…st-st-st-still

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**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/28 "2001-11-01T04:41:14Z")

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“T-t-thissss is C-C-C-C-N-N-N-N-N…”

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**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\
**Post date:** [November 1, 2001, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-torgo-game-for-mst3k-fans/90665/29 "2001-11-01T12:46:54Z")

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“My n-n-name is T-t-torgo…would you l-l-l-like to select a china p-p-p-pattern?”  
Ladies, get out the money…dancing to Closer by Nine Inch Nails…Torgo [sub]You l-l-let me v-v-v-violate you[/sub]

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