# The "Tradwife" lifestyle: Does anyone else find this appealing, or have personal experience with it? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 1, 2024, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528 "2024-11-01T02:07:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/181 "2024-12-06T22:37:33Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > he NYT had an article yesterday about Hannah Neeleman the day after CBS’ FBI has an episode about a “tradwife” serial killer. A serial killer who was a tradwife, a serial killer who killed tradwives, or a serial killer who was a tradwife who also killed tradwives? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/182 "2024-12-06T22:55:19Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > A serial killer who was a tradwife, a serial killer who killed tradwives, or a serial killer who was a tradwife who also killed tradwives? It was really complicated! The killer was a woman who worked at a OBGYN office, and was in love/infatuated with her boss, a doctor whose wife was a trad wife. The guy’s wife made tradwife videos. The guy’s wife died and the killer tried but failed to establish a relationship with him. The killer is unable to have children, This is crucial. So, she commits a crime that only is logical to the insane and Hollywood screenwriters: she kidnaps women who come to her office who want to have tubal ligations. She thi9nks that young fertile women should be making babies. To do otherwise is an abomination. After she kidnaps them, she forces them to be made over to look like the dead wife, then forces them to make perfect copies of the late tradwife’s videos. When they fail (and they always fail) she kills them, guts them, steals their uteri and keeps the harvested uteri in her fridge. So in answer to your question,she wanted to be, yes after she made them into ones, and pretty much yes. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/183 "2024-12-06T22:59:11Z")
I am very very sorry I asked. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/184 "2024-12-06T23:01:23Z")
I’m exceedingly sorry you asked. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/185 "2024-12-06T23:02:30Z")
Are you Stephen King? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2024, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/186 "2024-12-06T23:09:28Z")
Aw, come on! it has something for everyone! tradwife Jeffry Dahlmer allusions childless guilt torture unrequited love three different suspects plus stalking of the lead agent by a previous perp she arrested, who apparently cut her Also said agent is having issues because she adopted a child and has guilt because her job keeps her from being a “proper” parent (tradmom?) All this in 42 minutes! Remember this is CBS. Their goal as a network seems to be 1) scaring old people about how bad the outside world is, and 2) make the audience feel guilty for not having tradvalues. > [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Are you Stephen King? I wish! I just report. ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2024, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/187 "2024-12-09T02:22:11Z")
I’m dipping back into this to say sorry to those that argued with me on the “tradwife” definition. I didn’t realize what all “tradwife” meant until I read the recent NYTimes article about one big influencer (gift link below). I’m insulated enough against social media that I didn’t know it was a big thing there. I still see “tradwife” stuff all around me, but it isn’t fed through insta-face-tok. Mea Culpa. [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/12/03/dining/ballerina-farm-hannah-neeleman.html?unlocked\_article\_code=1.gE4.c3Un.owKiAcdrhyst&smid=url-share](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/12/03/dining/ballerina-farm-hannah-neeleman.html?unlocked_article_code=1.gE4.c3Un.owKiAcdrhyst&smid=url-share) ---
**Author:** ![JackieLikesVariety](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackielikesvariety/32/296_2.png) [@JackieLikesVariety](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JackieLikesVariety)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2024, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/188 "2024-12-09T17:34:25Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > I’m dipping back into this to say sorry classy, @wguy123 good on ya ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2024, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/189 "2024-12-19T23:28:32Z")
This is what NPR has to say about it. > **[Tradwife life isn't as good as it looks on TikTok – just ask former tradwives](https://www.npr.org/2024/12/17/nx-s1-5206673/tradwives-have-taken-over-tiktok-now-ex-tradwives-want-their-moment?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_term=nprnews&utm_campaign=npr&utm_medium=social&fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR3KpG14kQlP9M-lTWJcxsk2HcqwpaeN2ytP75ffFd_jwgxjmugzgvltTS0_aem_qkc5jk0fpCgTj-3aKrVeag)** > > Tradwives make it look glamorous to quit the workforce to stay home with the kids. But women who have tried the lifestyle themselves say there's a lot you're not seeing on TikTok. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/190 "2025-07-01T05:55:40Z")
I knew I had a thread about this, when this video popped up in my YT feed. This person is also talking about a lot of multi-generational trauma. I really do believe that much marital unhappiness in that era came almost exclusively from the husbands’ behavior, because he knew he could do anything he wanted, to anyone he wanted, and nothing would happen to him. The whole 'it takes two" in relationship unhappiness and divorce? Not back then. > **[The Dark Secrets of 1950s America](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llqwHZcotFU%2F)** > > The 1950s is an idealized era in the American imagination, and also an era of great prosperity. But there is also has a dark reality behind the shiny facade ... ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/191 "2025-07-01T08:41:42Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I really do believe that much marital unhappiness in that era came almost exclusively from the husbands’ behavior, because he knew he could do anything he wanted, to anyone he wanted, and nothing would happen to him. In many cases, absolutely. But I think that there were also men who felt as trapped by the lifestyle as their wives did. Sure, they could have careers, and screw around, but God forbid they spend time with their children and be involved in their lives. That’s women’s work - a real man should be at the office or at the bar, not at home. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/192 "2025-07-01T10:58:38Z")
Please. Men may not have been happy either, but their situation was light years better than that of women. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/193 "2025-07-01T11:01:57Z")
I’m not saying it wasn’t. I’m saying that that era was bad for everyone, and its ending benefitted both women _and_ men. Not everything has to be zero sum. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/194 "2025-07-01T11:07:47Z")
A big difference was that if a man chose not to marry he’d basically be able to have the same wealth, status, and life style than if he did. Unmarried women were at great disadvantage and were essentially relegated to poverty, would find it almost impossible to own their own home (unless they inherited wealth - the rules are always different for the rich), could not get credit, were legally paid less for the exact same work when they could find a job… I’m not saying men didn’t have problems. They did. But they weren’t nearly as trapped as women. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/195 "2025-07-01T17:16:41Z")
Not Tradwife, but my wife and I have fallen into different roles. Not all of them traditional. This isn’t written in stone at all because we both do everything. I think it’s more, “I don’t mind this, as much as that, or that I’m better at this than she/he” But dealing with house/life is pretty evenly split. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/196 "2025-07-01T17:45:40Z")
Would any of us be here if not for those Pre-1950 married couples? Woman(young girls really) trying to get away from oppresive parents. Arranged marriages. Woman runs away and gets caught up with some guy. Older mans wife dies. He’s looking for a person to replace her, raise his kids. WW2. Shit happened. This is why. Hell yeah the woman paid. Her body was comprimised. Some, to death. She was pushed down, dismissed, used. But she wasn’t living in a whorehouse. Or streetwalking. Womens choices were limited. No doubt. ---
**Author:** ![Zoobi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/13edae/32.png) [@Zoobi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoobi)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/197 "2025-07-01T17:50:57Z")
I’ve read this several times and I still don’t understand what you are trying to say. Better that women died of abusive relationships than street walking? I think there’s a pretty big excluded middle there. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/198 "2025-07-01T17:59:01Z")
My husband has a cousin who is deeply religious/conservative and who frequently laments that women aren’t submitting to their husbands because that way lies true happiness. The funny thing is, she’s a working mother who absolutely dominates her relationships. She never backs down on anything. She recently had a windfall and straight up lied to her husband about how much it was because she doesn’t trust him not to spend it. So whatever her dream is, she ain’t living it. My general feeling about tradwives is I don’t care what lifestyle they choose but it certainly opens them up for more risks when violence and control are involved, and I think anyone going that route should be aware those are very real risks. Not to mention what happens when times get tough and you have to get a job but have no work experience? Also, just… How do people afford this? I couldn’t do it if I wanted to. Which I don’t. But I can’t imagine surviving on one income. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/199 "2025-07-01T18:03:33Z")
I’ve noticed this too in conservative Christianity. Many churches are full of women who preach the virtues of the wife submitting to the husband, yet utterly dominate their husbands. (Some lament, though, that they could submit if their husband would just ‘be more of a man and lead me.’) ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2025, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528/200 "2025-07-01T18:05:19Z")
Maybe they should just find an egalitarian man who is into BDSM and call it a day. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-tradwife-lifestyle-does-anyone-else-find-this-appealing-or-have-personal-experience-with-it/1009528.md?page=11)