# The truth about "Classic Rock" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 8, 2011, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905 "2011-08-08T02:46:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/1 "2011-08-08T02:46:46Z")
Listen, guys. I know this is probably a generational thing, and I don’t expect anyone to agree with me. But I just can’t take it anymore. “Classic rock” sucks. It just sucks. It’s a romance invented by baby boomers who want their kids to believe that their generation was the last one that cared and that was able to accomplish anything (boy, do those videos of Woodstock make me believe in a nation of youth united for change! Fuck Woodstock.), and so they tell their kids that “the music meant something back then” and “they don’t make it like that anymore,” while they play the same six fucking songs on every “classic rock” station 24/7 around the stupid country. Here’s a tip, DJs: **No one ever needs to hear “Born to Be Wild,” ever again, for the rest of human existence. Not once. Ever.** Also, all the classic “guitar heroes?” Absolute wankers. Jimmy Paige? Eric Clapton? Ritchie Blackmore? Keith Richards? Stevie Ray Vaughn? Pete Townshend? Joe Perry? Total fucking wankers. Skilled? Sure. Interesting? Not even a little. Also, if it weren’t for “Yellow Submarine,” _Revolver_ would be the only Beatles album that’s good at the wall through. As it stands, none of them are. While I’m at it, Queen sucked, the Eagles sucked, Cream sucked, Led Zeppelin sucked, and by the 70s, the Who sucked too. Also, fuck wah-wah pedals. Yeah, all this music was very very important, and I’m not going to be so foolish as to deny that. But ex-hippies, get the fuck over yourselves. Okay everyone, rip me apart now. I just really needed to get that out. There’ll probably be more as I think of it, too. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/2 "2011-08-08T02:50:20Z")
> [@punch line loser](#): > > okay everyone, rip me apart now. I just really needed to get that out. There’ll probably be more as i think of it, too. dnftt ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/3 "2011-08-08T02:50:21Z")
You hate Captain America _and_ Classic Rock? Man, you’re edgy! ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/4 "2011-08-08T02:50:21Z")
To allow us to formulate a clearer evaluation of your cogent and persuasively-argued critique, perhaps you’d care to tell us what music you DO find interesting. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/5 "2011-08-08T02:50:46Z")
Question: What music do you listen to? ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/6 "2011-08-08T02:51:32Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Question: What music do you listen to? That’s what Cafe Society is for! ---
**Author:** ![sitchensis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sitchensis/32/4892_2.png) [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/7 "2011-08-08T02:53:10Z")
ballsy ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/8 "2011-08-08T02:54:29Z")
Let me condense the OP: “In my (completely subjective) opinion, the music that so many people listen to and love is garbage.” That some songs are overplayed is clear. But to hate on all of classic rock because of it? That’s ridiculous. Furthermore, it may not be up your alley. I’ll respect someone who doesn’t like, say, Behemoth’s “Ov Fire and the Void”, but I will verbally bitchslap you if you try to bring them down on a musical/objective level. ---
**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/9 "2011-08-08T02:55:18Z")
I don’t necessarily agree that all classic rock sucks, but I will say that for the most part I’m totally over it. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/10 "2011-08-08T02:55:26Z")
So your definition of interesting is “lacking in talent.” ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/11 "2011-08-08T02:55:56Z")
To me, this period represents a low point in rock ‘n’ roll. By the end of the 60s, it was all about theatrics and pyrotechnics, whether literally or in terms of guitar technique. The performers were miles away from the audience, and they were put on pedestals to a point where kids were growing up thinking, “I could never do that.” I think that’s fucked up. I don’t know how well you can play guitar, I don’t need to hear you noodling for twenty minutes, not ever. Also, Robert Plant has a voice like nails on on a chalkboard. ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/12 "2011-08-08T02:57:02Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > Let me condense the OP: “In my (completely subjective) opinion, the music that so many people listen to and love is garbage.” > > That some songs are overplayed is clear. But to hate on all of classic rock because of it? That’s ridiculous. Furthermore, it may not be up your alley. I’ll respect someone who doesn’t like, say, Behemoth’s “Ov Fire and the Void”, but I will verbally bitchslap you if you try to bring them down on a musical/objective level. Okay, I never saw the point of making statements like this. I’m clearly not going to change anybody’s mind, why pussyfoot around my opinion with wishy-washy language? I THINK all this shit sucks. Is that better? ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/13 "2011-08-08T02:57:56Z")
> [@punch\_line\_loser](#): > > Also, Robert Plant has a voice like nails on on a chalkboard. All right, let’s get something straight here. You are entitled to your opinion, but when you get into the realm of _objective criticism_, then I _will_ bitchslap you. Case in point: Plant’s voice is alternative, but it led a whole movement of people trying to emulate that wailing, crazy sound. Just listen to Whitesnake or Wolfmother and you’ll see _exactly_ what I mean. You’re objectively wrong; and you may go fuck yourself. You’ve overstepped the bounds of “my subjective opinion” and I will nail you to the cross for doing so. ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/14 "2011-08-08T02:58:02Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > So your definition of interesting is “lacking in talent.” I didn’t say that. But the wankery that has become canonized and continues to pollute the airwaves is lacking (to me, anyway) the kind of viscerality that makes rock so immediate and also lacking anything else interesting enough to make up for that. ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/15 "2011-08-08T03:01:00Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > All right, let’s get something straight here. You are entitled to your opinion, but when you get into the realm of _objective criticism_, then I _will_ bitchslap you. Case in point: Plant’s voice is alternative, but it led a whole movement of people trying to emulate that wailing, crazy sound. Just listen to Whitesnake or Wolfmother and you’ll see _exactly_ what I mean. You’re objectively wrong; and you may go fuck yourself. You’ve overstepped the bounds of “my subjective opinion” and I will nail you to the cross for doing so. Nail me to the cross? How is it possible to discuss a subjective topic objectively? I obviously didn’t convince you, so who gives a shit whether the words “to me” are in there? I’m not trying to speak for anyone besides myself, so get off your high horse - you couldn’t “bitch slap” me from up there. Besides, Plant did indeed encourage a movement of obnoxious wailing singers, just like Jimmy Paige inspired legions of uninspired-yet-technically-able wankers. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/16 "2011-08-08T03:04:40Z")
Page. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/17 "2011-08-08T03:06:29Z")
> [@punch\_line\_loser](#): > > That’s what Cafe Society is for! If you don’t want to confess your hard-on for Dave Matthews and Cheryl Crow, that’s fine. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/18 "2011-08-08T03:06:53Z")
You know that thing you like? It sucks. And you suck for liking it. ---
**Author:** ![sitchensis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sitchensis/32/4892_2.png) [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/19 "2011-08-08T03:08:54Z")
> [@runner pat](#): > > So your definition of interesting is “lacking in talent.” > [@punch\_line\_loser](#): > > To me, this period represents a low point in rock ‘n’ roll. By the end of the 60s, it was all about theatrics and pyrotechnics, whether literally or in terms of guitar technique. The performers were miles away from the audience, and they were put on pedestals to a point where kids were growing up thinking, “I could never do that.” I think that’s fucked up. I don’t know how well you can play guitar, I don’t need to hear you noodling for twenty minutes, not ever. > > Also, Robert Plant has a voice like nails on on a chalkboard. The definition of good music now includes “can’t be entertaining”, “shouldn’t be able to fill a venue”, and “shouldn’t be more talented than a child”. ---
**Author:** ![punch\_line\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8e7dd6/32.png) [@punch\_line\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punch_line_loser)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905/20 "2011-08-08T03:09:23Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > If you don’t want to confess your hard-on for Dave Matthews and Cheryl Crow, that’s fine. Wouldn’t call myself a fan of either, but Dave Matthews had a decent single or two early on. Kind of interesting that that’s the dichotomy, though. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-truth-about-classic-rock/591905.md?page=2)