# The Ultimate Badass of All Media **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [October 13, 2009, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699 "2009-10-13T20:59:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/1 "2009-10-13T20:59:27Z")
My son’s been watching The [Ultimate Showdown](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwBK31tC5QM) on Youtube over and over again and I thought it might be fun to have an ultimate showdown of our own, pitting major badasses from a variety of different sources against each other to see who will come out on top. The starting slate of badasses are my own idiosyncratic picks. If someone you want isn’t on the list, too bad. I thought of it first, so I get to pick. My criteria for badassness: 1. They’re not just strong – they demonstrate they’re strong by kicking ass over and over again. 2. They’re virtually indestructible. Even when you think they’re defeated they come back and kick ass. 3. They’re usually three or four steps ahead of their enemies. They’re already kicking ass before the bad guys (or good guys) even know that they’re going to have their asses kicked. 4. They’re all fictional, except for Chuck Norris who might as well be make-believe at this point. 5. Only one badass per fictional world is allowed. Gandalf is on the list, so Legolas isn’t, even though Legolas is a major badass. It’s more fun to compare characters from wildly different worlds. Plus, it gives me an excuse to exclude most superheros since arguing over which superhero is tougher is tedious and geeky. 6. As much as it pains me to exclude Optimus Prime and Godzilla … only beings who are roughly human-sized are included, to make it fair. 7. I’ve tried to pick badasses who are at least moderately well-known, if not outright famous. I’m sure there’s an obscure robot samurai from some crazy otaku anime that no one has ever heard of who is a bigger badass than everyone on the list. I don’t care. The competition is a standard single-elimination tournament. With the exception of a few top seeds (Batman, Chuck Norris, Darth Vader, etc.) initial rankings were assigned randomly. Vote for ONE badass out of each match-up. At the end of the day on the 16th I’ll tally the votes. The winners of each match will advance to round two, and we’ll start voting again. Explaining the reasoning behind your votes is encouraged, but not mandatory. Batman vs. Mad Max Master Chief (Halo) vs. Count Dracula Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) vs. Indiana Jones The Alien (Alien) vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Darth Vader vs. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Kratos (God of War) vs. John McClane (Diehard) The Terminator vs. John Rambo Goku (Dragonball) vs. The Bride (Kill Bill) Gandalf the White vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. James Bond River Tam (Firefly) vs. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Conan the Barbarian vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) vs. Jack Bauer (24) Chuck Norris vs. Agent Smith (The Matrix) ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/2 "2009-10-13T21:40:48Z")
> [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max No way does Mel Gibson last against the Darknight Detective. Batman in a walkover. > [@](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Dracula. Brother made it for 400 years before getting sucker-punched by the British Empire. > [@](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones Indy. Anybody who can survive an atomic blast with just a refrigerator for protection isn’t going to have a problem with a Darth Vader wannabe. > [@](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Tough one. I’ll take the Alien. If she goes down, she can always reproduce. > [@](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Good match. My knee-jerk reaction is to pick Vader, but he’s been thoroughly humiliated by Obi-Wan, Luke, and even Han Solo. What the hey…Sephiroth. > [@](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Kratos. Die Hard 2 is one of my least favorite movies. > [@](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo Terminator. Fewer mental issues. > [@](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) For the love of God, how much manga do you read? The Bride. Just ask the Crazy 88. > [@](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Gandalf. As much as I like Hannibal, it’s much easier to kick ass against police and psychologists than against dragons and wizards with galactic powers. > [@](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Dirty Harry. Never lost his shirt. > [@](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond Bond. See the comment about the British Empire above. If their lamest got Dracula, their best can sure as hell get Freddy. > [@](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Beats me. River Tam, I guess. > [@](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Thank you for including Brock. He may well be my dark horse for winning the whole thing. Dr. Orpheus doesn’t seem to scare him, so I doubt he’ll have much trouble with Voldemort. > [@](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan. Montana’s not thinking straight on account of the blow. > [@](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Bourne. Just keeps getting better. > [@](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Chuck Norris. To explain why, I’d have to invert the Ontological Proof of God’s Existence, so let’s just leave it at that. ---
**Author:** ![Animastryfe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8797f3/32.png) [@Animastryfe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Animastryfe)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/3 "2009-10-13T22:00:52Z")
> [@](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max Batman > [@](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Dracula from what franchise? If you mean the original Bram Stoker Dracula, then I vote for Master Chief. > [@](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones Kusanagi > [@](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) The Alien > [@](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Word of God says that Sephiroth is the most powerful being in the FF7 universe. I also like Final Fantasy more than Star Wars, so I vote for Sephiroth. > [@](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Kratos. McClane is a mere human. > [@](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo The Terminator. > [@](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) If this was a “who would win in a fight”, then I don’t see how anyone on this list could beat Goku. But by your criteria, I vote for The Bride. > [@](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) This is difficult. I vote for Hannibal. > [@](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Kirk. I admit that I have never seen Dirty Harry, and the only time I’ve seen Kirk is in the recent Star Trek movie. > [@](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond Bond. > [@](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Snake. By far. > [@](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Can I not vote for this one? > [@](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan. > [@](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Bourne. > [@](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Norris. ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/4 "2009-10-13T22:15:14Z")
**Batman** vs. Mad Max Batman versus Mel Gibson? Come on.Even the Batmobile is more Badass than the Pursuit Special **Master Chief (Halo)** vs. Count Dracula Jonathan Harker and a whole slew of Belmonts have killed Drac. The Master Chief lays waste to aliens. Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) vs. **Indiana Jones** I don’t really know Ghost in the Shell. But Indy is more badass than anything I’ve ever seen in an anime flick. **The Alien (Alien)** vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Jason’s mean, but the Alien is a biological slaughtering machine. Darth Vader vs. **Sephiroth (Final Fantasy)** Baddest Ass in the history of video games versus a guy whose legacy is ruined by turning out to be a crusty old white guy in RotJ. I’m purposefully blinding myself to the various prequels for both of these guys. Kratos (God of War) vs. **John McClane (Diehard)** Kratos needs all sorts of gifts from the gods to be badass. John McClane is badass in his socks. **The Terminator** vs. John Rambo Just going with Arnie over Sly, here. Goku (Dragonball) vs. **The Bride (Kill Bill)** Again, limited experience with anime. The Bride slices her way through anything. **Gandalf the White** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Toughest one so far.Hannibal Lecter wins on style points, but Gandalf killed a fucking Balrog. \*\* Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry)\*\* vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Kirk isn’t badass. Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. **James Bond** I love me some Freddy. But James Bond is just quintessential baddassery. And he doesn’t wear a shirt stolen from the guys from Mudhoney. River Tam (Firefly) vs.\*\* Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid)\*\* It’s only a box. Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. **Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** Voldy couldn’t even kill a baby. Conan the Barbarian vs. **Tony Montana (Scarface)** Part of badassery is having a great line. “Say hello to my little friend.” versus “By the might of Crom”? No contest. Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) vs. **Jack Bauer (24)** Yawn. Both these guys kinda suck. **Chuck Norris** vs. Agent Smith (The Matrix) Walker, Texas Ranger would kick Agent Smith’s ass, and still have time to teach the kids at the local high school why taking blue, red or any other sorts of pills are bad. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/5 "2009-10-13T22:30:47Z")
> [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max Batman in an easy victory. He doesn’t even break a batsweat. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Dracula. He’ll get a much needed comeuppance, but in the end, his powers outweigh Master Chief, who relys on armaments. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones Jones gets his ass kicked constantly. Kusanagi in a landslide. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) The Alien. Unless she is having sex in the upstairs bedroom when he gets there. Then Jason has a huge advantage. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Oooooo. I like this one. Sephiroth because Vader gets his ass kicked by Luke fucking Skywalker. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Kratos. No matter how hard it is for McClane to die, he just can’t hang with the big boys. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo I’ll go with Rambo. If John Connor can beat a Terminator, so can Rambo. > [@The Hamster king](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) The Bride. I’ve never seen/followed Dragonball. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Gandalf. Lecter is smart and all, but so is Gandalf. And when the fecal matter hits the rotating propellor, Gandalf still has the magic and the sword. YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!! > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Harry Callahan. Unless there was some alien nookie involved somehow. But Kirk gets his ass handed to him way too often and Callahan won’t let up. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond Bond, if he gets to use all his stuff. He’ll figure out a way to get rid of Freddy while avoiding those razor sharp fingernails. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) This wholly and completely depends on the situation. River Tam easily if her brother is threatened, but other than that, she’s hopeless. But if Snake doesn’t have a cardboard box, he’s easily defeated. I’ll go with River Tam and assume she’s got a reason to actually fight. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Voldemort. I don’t know Brock. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan would rip his head off and nail all his women before Montana’s body hit the ground. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Bourne. Easy. > [@The Hamster King](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Smith. If he can beat every single person except The One, that’s enough to take out Chuck Norris. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2009, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/6 "2009-10-14T01:18:38Z")
Batman Count Dracula Indiana Jones Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) John McClane (Diehard) John Rambo The Bride (Kill Bill) Gandalf the White James Kirk (Star Trek) Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) River Tam (Firefly) Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) Tony Montana (Scarface) Jack Bauer (24) Agent Smith (The Matrix) ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2009, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/7 "2009-10-14T02:17:22Z")
Batman vs. Mad Max duh. This must be one of those 1 vs. 16 matchups. Batman. Master Chief (Halo) vs. Count Dracula Dracula Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) vs. Indiana Jones Indy gets beat up too much. The other guy. The Alien (Alien) vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Jason. Never. Dies. Darth Vader vs. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Sephiroth. I’ve never played any FF game, but I know Vader would get his ass handed to him by anyone deserving the name “badass”. Kratos (God of War) vs. John McClane (Diehard) McClane, just because. The Terminator vs. John Rambo Hm. Terminator. Goku (Dragonball) vs. The Bride (Kill Bill) pass Gandalf the White vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Gandalf Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) James. T. Kirk. Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. James Bond James. T. Bond. River Tam (Firefly) vs. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) River. Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Uh, Voldemort I guess. Conan the Barbarian vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan. Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) vs. Jack Bauer (24) pass Chuck Norris vs. Agent Smith (The Matrix) They fight to a standstill, until the little-known “Evening Gown contest” tie-breaker kicks in. At which point, Agent Smith knocks 'em dead with his STUNNING Vegas showgirl ensemble. Yes, I posted this whole thing just to make a _Priscilla, Queen of the Desert_ joke. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Credible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a8b319/32.png) [@Justin\_Credible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Credible)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2009, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/8 "2009-10-14T11:48:56Z")
Batman vs. **Mad Max** Batman’s no kill policy takes him down several notches in the badass category. Master Chief (Halo) vs. Count Dracula I’ll pass on this one; I’m not familiar with Master Chef. Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) vs. Indiana Jones skip this one too. The Alien (Alien) vs. **Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th)** **Darth Vader** vs. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) This one was tough. Kratos (God of War) vs. **John McClane (Diehard)** **The Terminator** vs. John Rambo Goku (Dragonball) vs. **The Bride (Kill Bill)** **Gandalf the White** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) **Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry)** vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. **James Bond** River Tam (Firefly) vs. **Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid)** Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. **Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** **Conan the Barbarian** vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) vs. **Jack Bauer (24)** **Chuck Norris** vs. Agent Smith (The Matrix) ETA: I think Wolverine should have been in the competition. And possibly a Predator instead of the Alien. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2009, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/9 "2009-10-14T14:04:05Z")
> [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max Batman has \*got \*to be prepared for “shitkicker with a rusty sawnoff”. > [@](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Dracula - he’ll probably get his ass kicked. But in a hundred years, he’ll rise again, no fuss, no muss. > [@](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones In what world in Indy a badass ? He keeps getting punched in the face. > [@](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Let’s see, a nightmare fuel-off. Well, with Jason you wake up screaming because you’re going to get a knife in the face. With the Xenomorph, you wake up screaming because you’re going to get a facefull of Alien wing-wong. And then experience pregnancy in a whole different way. Alien by a creepy landslide. > [@](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Vote goes to the Nubian god. Can’t stand bishies. > [@](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Ok, this has _got_ to be the most rigged fight yet. John McLane stuggles to fight East European terrorists. Kratos rips demigods’ heads off with his bare fucking hands. Then pisses down the stump. > [@](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo Rambo. He’s got the same methodical badass as Termie, but adds a layer of ornery on top (at least in the first flick - I refuse to rate the three subsequent abortions). > [@](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) In a surprising twist, The Bride lops his head off because he won’t hit girls. > [@](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Is Hannibal Lecter tougher’n a Balrog ? Is he ? I thought not. > [@](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Ooh, classic one. I’m gonna go with Kirk here - at least he doesn’t need an iron cock supplement. > [@](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond In the battle between suave and deformed, suave wins 100% of the time. This is movieland. Pretty boy wins. > [@](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Damn you. I want to say River. I really do. But Snake has experience in dealing with superpowered schyzophreniac girls. He shoots them in the face. AND he does it when he’s a million years old, dammit ! > [@](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Who the what ? > [@](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan fantasizes about hearing the lamentations of his enemies women. Tony makes it happen. > [@](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Torture ain’t badass. Jason wins, and he doesn’t even remember it. > [@](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Pains me to say so, but Chuck. On the grounds that while Agent Smith got killed by Woah Reeves about ten thousand times, it took fucking Bruce Lee to kill Chuck Norris just the once. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/10 "2009-10-15T10:48:26Z")
> [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max Batman. The guy hangs with superhumans after all. And beats them, on a regular basis. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Never played Halo; pass. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones Motoko Kusanagi. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Alien. Jason loses on badass points for being too human. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Hmmmm. Good one, but I give the vote to Sephiroth for coming back from defeat without surgical assistance, and greater personal power. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Kratos. Getting killed and fighting your way back to the mortal world? _ **That’s** _ badass. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo Terminator. Again, John loses points for being a mere human. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) Bride. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Hannibal. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Harry. Kirk has his moments, but he gets beaten by guys whose head Harry would blow _ **clean off** _. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond Freddy. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Snake; River is only _ **sometimes** _ badass. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Brock. Nobody’s badass like the Swedish Murder Machine. Well, maybe Kratos. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Hmm. Conan, he gets extra badass points for beating down other warriors with with melee weapons. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Pass; never watched either. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Pass. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/11 "2009-10-15T15:32:56Z")
**Batman** vs. Mad Max **Master Chief (Halo)** vs. Count Dracula **Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell)** vs. Indiana Jones **The Alien (Alien)** vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Darth Vader vs. **Sephiroth (Final Fantasy)** **Kratos (God of War)** vs. John McClane (Diehard) **The Terminator** vs. John Rambo Goku (Dragonball) vs. **The Bride (Kill Bill)** **Gandalf the White** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) \*\* Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry)\*\* vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. **James Bond** River Tam (Firefly) vs. **Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid)** Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) **vs. Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** Those of you who voted for Voldemort, do you just not know who Brock is? He routinely kills enough men with his bare hands to end up drenched in gore from head to toe. Using a gun to kill is beneath him because it isn’t macho enough. I could kill Voldemort. **Conan the Barbarian** vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) **Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity)** vs. Jack Bauer (24) Chuck Norris vs. **Agent Smith (The Matrix)** ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Skeezix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aca169/32.png) [@Red\_Skeezix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Skeezix)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2009, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/12 "2009-10-15T15:34:57Z")
> [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Batman > vs. > Mad Max Batman. > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Master Chief (Halo) > vs. > Count Dracula Master Chief > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) > vs. > Indiana Jones Indiana Jones > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > The Alien (Alien) > vs. > Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Alien > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Darth Vader > vs. > Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Sephiroth > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Kratos (God of War) > vs. > John McClane (Diehard) Kratos > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > The Terminator > vs. > John Rambo Terminator > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Goku (Dragonball) > vs. > The Bride (Kill Bill) Bride > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Gandalf the White > vs. > Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) Gandalf > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) > vs. > James Kirk (Star Trek) Dirty Harry > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) > vs. > James Bond Bond > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > River Tam (Firefly) > vs. > Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Solid Snake > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) Brock Sampson > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Conan the Barbarian > vs. > Tony Montana (Scarface) Conan > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) > vs. > Jack Bauer (24) Bourne > [@The\_Hamster\_King](#): > > Chuck Norris > vs. > Agent Smith (The Matrix) Chuck Norris ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/13 "2009-10-16T00:36:27Z")
I held off putting my votes in so as not to bias the results. I’ll keep it open until tomorrow, then tally the results: **Batman** vs. Mad Max Master Chief (Halo) vs. **Count Dracula** **Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell)** vs. Indiana Jones **The Alien (Alien)** vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) **Darth Vader** vs. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) Kratos (God of War) vs. **John McClane (Diehard)** **The Terminator** vs. John Rambo **Goku (Dragonball)** vs. The Bride (Kill Bill) **Gandalf the White** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) **Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry)** vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. **James Bond** **River Tam (Firefly)** vs. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. **Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** **Conan the Barbarian** vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) **Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity)** vs. Jack Bauer (24) Chuck Norris vs. \*\*Agent Smith (The Matrix) [/QUOTE] \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/14 "2009-10-16T01:51:19Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) > **vs. > Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** > > Those of you who voted for Voldemort, do you just not know who Brock is? He routinely kills enough men with his bare hands to end up drenched in gore from head to toe. Using a gun to kill is beneath him because it isn’t macho enough. He even strangled a henchman to death while drugged unconscious. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2009, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/15 "2009-10-16T02:32:21Z")
Batman vs. **Mad Max** No ones ever done a campy Mad Max **Master Chief (Halo)** vs. Count Dracula Master Chief is sunlight proof. **Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell)** vs. Indiana Jones Indy isn’t really a badass. He’s constantly flustered and put-upon. **The Alien (Alien)** vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) Jason would be lucky to last 10 seconds. Darth Vader vs. **Sephiroth (Final Fantasy)** Vader’s a lot better at looking menacing then actually doing anything other then choking underlings to death. **Kratos (God of War)** vs. John McClane (Diehard) **The Terminator** vs. John Rambo The Terminator gets killed at the end of every movie, and it doesn’t seem to make much difference. **Goku (Dragonball)** vs. The Bride (Kill Bill) **Gandalf the White** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) A psychologist vs a demi-god? **Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry)** vs. James Kirk (Star Trek) Eastwood is the quintessential badass. Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) vs. **James Bond** Hey, you broke your own rule. Freddy and Jason share a universe. **River Tam (Firefly)** vs. Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) vs. **Brock Samson (Venture Brothers)** Voldemort gets his ass beat over and over again by the same plucky band of school children **Conan the Barbarian** vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) Coked out looser vs trained gladiator. **Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity)** vs. Jack Bauer (24) Chuck Norris vs. **Agent Smith (The Matrix)** Chuck Norris stole Vin Disel’s meme ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2009, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/16 "2009-10-17T04:01:35Z")
ROUND ONE IS OVER! The results have been tallied! **Batman 12** vs. Mad Max 1 Not much of a contest here. The caped crusader crushes the opposition! Master Chief (Halo) 5 vs. **Count Dracula 6** It was a close battle, but, in the end, the count’s ability to not stay down for the count (ha-ha) seems to have tipped things in his favor! **Motoko Kusanagi (Ghost in the Shell) 8** vs. Indiana Jones 4 Score one for the girls. The cybernetic assassin easily beats the college professor. **The Alien (Alien) 10** vs. Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th) 3 The hockey mask doesn’t stop the alien from ripping through Jason like a picnic table full of tacos. Darth Vader 2 vs. **Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) 11** Wow. I thought this would be closer. There’s a lot of Vader haters out there. **Kratos (God of War) 8** vs. John McClane (Diehard) 5 Personally I was rooting for McClane, but once I saw this match come up in the seeding, I knew it was a long shot. **The Terminator 10** vs. John Rambo 3 The robotic killing machine rolls right over the crazy Vietnam vet. Goku (Dragonball) 2 vs. **The Bride (Kill Bill) 10** Another one that I thought would be closer. Goku’s tougher, but he’s not really ruthless, which I guess really knocks him down in the badass department. **Gandalf the White 11** vs. Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs) 2 No contest. Gandalf dusts the psycho without even breaking a sweat. **Harry Callahan (Dirty Harry) 9** vs. James T. Kirk (Star Trek) 4 Not really a surprise. Freddy Krueger (Nightmare on Elm Street) 2 vs. **James Bond 11** I don’t think poor Freddy even knew what hit him. All the horror movie bad guys are knocked out in round one. I guess they’re not so badass after all. River Tam (Firefly) 6 vs. **Solid Snake (Metal Gear Solid) 7** Soooooo close. But Snake edges out a win. Lord Voldemort (Harry Potter) 3 vs. **Brock Samson (Venture Brothers) 8** Brock rams Voldemort’s wand WAYYYYY up there. **Conan the Barbarian 10** vs. Tony Montana (Scarface) 3 And both of Arnold’s characters advance to round two! **Jason Bourne (The Bourne Identity) 8** vs. Jack Bauer (24) 3 Apparently amnesia increases badassitude. Chuck Norris 6 vs. Agent Smith (The Matrix) 6 A tie! So I reverted to my tie-breaker … asking my 12-year-old son who is the bigger badass. He stopped playing Overlord long enough to give it some serious consideration, and after due deliberation, it’s **Chuck Norris** , in sudden death overtime! Round two will start in a few minutes! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2009, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/17 "2009-10-17T04:16:02Z")
Round Two is [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=536277). ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Credible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a8b319/32.png) [@Justin\_Credible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Credible)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2009, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/18 "2009-10-17T04:19:19Z")
I believe _two_ people voted for Mad Max. I demand a recount! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2009, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-badass-of-all-media/513699/19 "2009-10-17T04:24:39Z")
> [@Justin\_Credible](#): > > I believe _two_ people voted for Mad Max. I demand a recount! Holy crap, you’re right! :smack: And I thought I had been so careful. I just double-checked Simplicio’s tallies and that’s the only one I got wrong. So, yes, the final vote is **Batman 11** vs. Mad Max 2 Now you’ve got me paranoid. I’m gonna recheck the close votes … .