# The Ultimate Recipe Thread!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [September 21, 2000, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932 "2000-09-21T00:46:07Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/41 "2000-09-23T04:03:20Z")

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Blush. Gersh.

'Scuse me while I do a most un-Veb-like preen and curl, purring, around **Zenster’s** ankles. Flattery, gluttony…–\>feral growl\<—

::: **Zenster** screams and hysterically kicks away clinging _thing_ licking his ankles:::

_Holy Bobby Flay with a squeeze bottle, an agent and a PR budget!_

Just let a hunk 'o cooked cow rest a bit, and lookit all the brouhaha.

Coy, lovin’ it and wishin’ Dopers to dinner,  
Veb

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**Author:** ![Dark\_Lord\_Davidson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bc8723/32.png) [@Dark\_Lord\_Davidson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Lord_Davidson)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/42 "2000-09-23T04:21:16Z")

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Ramen Deluxe

1 package Ramen noodles  
1 seasoning packet  
Salt and pepper to taste

Bring noodles to a boil, boil for 3 minutes.

Add seasoning packet, stir.

Add salt, pepper to taste.

The condiments make it deluxe. I recommend salt.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/43 "2000-09-23T20:02:01Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Lord Davidson \*  
> \*\*Ramen Deluxe
> 
> 1 package Ramen noodles  
> 1 seasoning packet  
> Salt and pepper to taste
> 
> Bring noodles to a boil, boil for 3 minutes.
> 
> Add seasoning packet, stir.
> 
> Add salt, pepper to taste.
> 
> The condiments make it deluxe. I recommend salt. \*\*

[Peter Lorre voice] You idiot, look what you’ve done! You fat bloated English toad, I should beat your brain in!"[/Peter Lorre voice]

You left out the five cents worth of ingredients that makes this humble dish a regal meal. Namely:

[li]One or two scallions (green onions).[/li]  
[li]Three or four drops of Lau Yu or Ray Yu oil.\*[/li]

- Roasted sesame chili oil, not cheap but used in such small amounts that it’s worth it. (Do not substitute raw sesame oil or other sesame chili oils that are cut with cottonseed or soya oils. They are inferior. The small addition of these inexpensive ingredients make this wondrous dish entirely edible.  
As **ssskuggiii** would say:

I praise thee, oh humble Ramen noodle. You provide laughter and nourishment. [And free jumpropes too!]

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**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/44 "2000-09-23T22:41:40Z")

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Well Zenster, now you’ve proved you have no idea what you are talking about. DOn’t you know you are supposed to grill Ramen noodles, you fool?

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**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/45 "2000-09-23T22:53:25Z")

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**Chicken Divan**

**Ingredients:**  
1 lb chicken breasts, cooked, cut in small pieces  
1 lb broccoli (frozen)  
1 lb cauliflower (frozen)  
1/4 cup flour  
1/4 cup margarine  
2 cups milk  
8 oz Cheez Whiz

**Cook it!**  
Cook chicken, add garlic and poultry seasoning to taste. (I like to use Montreal Chicken seasoning.) Cook broccoli and cauliflower. In a medium saucepan, melt margarine. Stir in flur, forming a thick paste. Gradually add milk, stirring constantly. Bring to a full boil. Remove from heat and stir in Cheez Whiz. Stir until all cheez is metled. Place chicken, broccoli and cauliflower in a 2qt casserole dish. Pour cheeze sauce over mixture, stir gently. Microwave on high 7 minutes. Serve with wide egg noodles.  
And for dessert…

**Smorbakelser (Svedish Butter Cookies)**

**Ingredients:**  
1 cup butter or margarine, softened  
2 egg yolks  
1/2 cup sugar, scant  
1 tsp vanilla extract  
1/4 tsp almond extract  
2 cups all-purpose flour

**Bake it!**  
Preheat oven to 450. Cream butter, egg yolks and sugar thoroughly until light and fluffy. Beat in vanilla and almond extracts. Stir in flour. Dough should be soft but not sticky. Press dough (about 1 tbsp) into tin molds, roll out and cut with cookie cutters, or use a cookie press. Bake about 10 minutes. Watch carefully, as they burn quickly. Cool cookies a few minutes, then carefully move them to cooling racks. Makes about 3 dozen.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/46 "2000-09-23T23:03:21Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Scylla \*  
> \*\*Well Zenster, now you’ve proved you have no idea what you are talking about. DOn’t you know you are supposed to grill Ramen noodles, you fool? \*\*

Hey **Scylla** , I grilled the ramen noodles for hours, but they still wouldn’t talk!

Neiner Neiner…

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 23, 2000, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/47 "2000-09-23T23:39:05Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by racinchikki \*  
> \*\ ***Chicken Divan**
> 
> **Ingredients:**  
> 1 lb chicken breasts, cooked, cut in small pieces  
> 1 lb broccoli (frozen)  
> 1 lb cauliflower (frozen)  
> 1/4 cup flour  
> 1/4 cup margarine  
> 2 cups milk  
> 8 oz Cheez Whiz
> 
> **Cook it!**  
> Cook chicken, add garlic and poultry seasoning to taste. (I like to use Montreal Chicken seasoning.) Cook broccoli and cauliflower. In a medium saucepan, melt margarine. Stir in flur, forming a thick paste. Gradually add milk, stirring constantly. Bring to a full boil. Remove from heat and stir in Cheez Whiz. Stir until all cheez is metled. Place chicken, broccoli and cauliflower in a 2qt casserole dish. Pour cheeze sauce over mixture, stir gently. Microwave on high 7 minutes. Serve with wide egg noodles. \<snick\> \*\*

Nice recipe **racinchikki** , but rhully, **Cheeze Whiz**? I know some people that swear by it, I am one of those who swear **at** it. Please substitute the following cheese sauce recipe and let me know how you like the results. You did, however, redeem yourself by including a butter cookie recipe for this Danish guy. Thanks for contributing!

**Cheese Sauce**

Makes around 2-3 cups.

**Ingredients** :

1 Cup grated Cheddar cheese  
2-4 Tbs white flour  
1/2-1 Cup half and half or milk  
1/2 Cube butter  
1/8 Tsp ground white pepper  
Salt to taste  
**Preparation** :

Make a roux with the butter and flour\*. After the roux has relaxed, turn the heat back on to low and **very slowly** add the milk or half and half. Stir constantly to avoid lumping. You are basically making a thin pudding. Once the dairy is incorporated bring the white sauce to a **very** gentle boil to thicken it. After it has thickened, **slowly** add the cheese. **Do not** allow the sauce to boil after this point or it will break and generally get nasty on you. If the sauce breaks, you will need to make some more roux into white sauce and bind the broken mixture with it. Once the cheese is completely melted, add the white pepper and adjust the salt to taste.

This cheese sauce is wonderful over brocolli or cauliflower. It is also great for nachos and twice baked potatoes (or “potato skins”). I have been able to get even the most finicky child to try vegetables once this sauce has been slathered on them.  
\ ***How to make a Roux** :

Over low heat, melt the butter in a sauce pan and add the flour. Stir well until completely mixed. If the roux is too dry, add some more butter. If it is too wet, add more flour. The final mixture should not run in the pan and yet still be semi-liquid. Allow mixture to cook for about fifteen minutes. The flour should begin to brown and have a nut like aroma. Continue to stir and make sure it is not sticking to the bottom of the pan. Once the flour has taken on a tawny color, shut off the heat and allow the roux to “relax” for another ten to fifteen minutes. This is a critical step whereby the flour granules “bloom” and lose their gritty texture.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/48 "2000-09-24T01:18:14Z")

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And to Ramen noodles, some shredded carrots, Napa cabbage, a few bean sprouts…actually, finely shredded zucchini is good.

A riff on the cheese sauce issue:

CRAB & CHEESE & STUFF

@ 8 oz. crab chunks (real, but imitation if ya gotta)  
6 oz. cooked shell pasta (smaller size, not the big shells)  
3 Tbsp. butter  
2 Tbsp. flour  
1 1/2 cup milk  
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese  
4 oz. shredded Havarti cheese  
1/3 cup sliced scallions  
(salt, pepper, etc.)

Boil pasta shells, w/ kosher salt, etc. Meanwhile…

Melt butter in saucepan, add flour and stir, cooking gently until it’s all golden. Add milk; cook, stirring until smooth and thickened. Stir in cheeses to mix & melt; mix in crab, pasta and scallions. Sprinkle w/ paprika, pepper or whatever, bake 20 minutes at 350 until bubbly.

BUT, unable to leave a recipe alone, I prefer to:

- add finely minced garlic to the roux
- add a splash of dry white wine to the roux
- substitute Gruyere, jack, mozzerella or a combo for the cheddar
- a drizzle of dry sherry over the top
- have long suspected that a scant handful of bay scallops might blend in well

Returning to foodie fanaticism, do not, EVER bake a spud in foil. Spuds are wondrous things, baked properly:

THE PERFECT BAKED POTATO

You’ll need:  
spuds  
food-quality rock salt (the same used in ice cream makers)  
a deep baking dish or roaster

_The salt does NOT make the spuds salty!_ It just creates a comfy oven that leaves the spud fluffy, and the skin crisp and golden.

- wash spuds well; prick several times; dry.
- apply thin coating of vegetable oil (Pam works well; butter can burn.)
- pour rock salt to cover bottom of pan
- plop in spuds, pour salt around and between and over; tuck and pack to make sure they’re snuggled in
- bake at 425 for 1 hour; remove from oven.
- brush top salt layer aside; remove spuds w/ tongs; brush away surface salt
- serve w/ toppings of choice
- let salt cool; it can be used 10 or more times.

I’m tempted to post my recipe for Carne Guisada for Scylla. It’s amazingly great stuff, but damned perfect Guy Food.

Veb

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![brachyrhynchos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brachyrhynchos/32/376_2.png) [@brachyrhynchos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brachyrhynchos)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/49 "2000-09-24T01:31:21Z")

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I don’t know Jo but I like this recipe with the odd combination of fish and bananas (yep).

Serves 4.

**Ingredients**  
8 medium skinless flounder fillets (about 1 and 1/2 lbs)  
Salt and Peppa  
2 slightly green bananas  
1 stick (1/4 lb) butter, cut into 8 equal pats  
1 very small onion, minced  
1/4 lb mushrooms, hand-chopped finely  
2 teaspoons all-purpose flour  
1/2 pint heavy cream  
2 tablespoons medium sherry (I use brandy)

**Preparation**  
Spread out fish fillets, cut side up, sprinkle with salt and pepper. Peel bananas and quarter them each lengthwise and crosswise. Place a banana piece along the widest end of each fillet and roll up; secure with toothpicks; reserve. In a 10-inch skillet over low heat, melt 4 pats butter; add onion and cook until translucent; quickly stir in mushrooms, then flour; add 4 remaining pats butter and stir until butter melts; stir in cream and sherry. Add fillets; cover and simmer, basting several times, until fish is opaque through - 15 minutes. Remove picks and serve with rice.

**Notes**  
I first tried this with flounder, but since have used a variety of fish, including orange roughy and red snapper. They can be sometimes hard to roll - I just use more toothpicks. Sometimes I add a small dollop of minced garlic and mushroom types can be your choice.

Yummy!

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/50 "2000-09-24T01:32:54Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by TVeblen \*  
> \*\*CRAB & CHEESE & STUFF
> 
> - have long suspected that a scant handful of bay scallops might blend in well \*\*

Beware **TVeblen** , ruining a good dish a few times has taught me to **always** saute any raw seafood before adding it to another recipe. Otherwise it can “sweat” an incredible amount of raw seafood flavor into the dish.

Just thought I’d pass that along. And, yes please, post the chili recipe.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/51 "2000-09-24T03:38:37Z")

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Stupid, evil self-inflicted AOL scragged the whole wordy but enthusiastic recipe I typed out.

Too bad, because it’d lift Scylla from his “recliner of power” for the seductive fumes issuing forth.

Grrrr. I’ll try it again tomorrow, when the Gateway Laptop From Hell is whipped into functionality.

Get your avacados, lime and garden tomatoes ready, folks. This reduces strong men and icy society matrons to salivating wimps.

Veb

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Salieri2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Salieri2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salieri2)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/52 "2000-09-24T05:04:40Z")

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Ike, you said:

> [@](#):
>
> I also love pasticcio, the Greek version of lasagne…a layer of cooked noodles, a layer of highly-spiced ground meat, a layer of cheese sauce, baked until browned.

Have you got a recipe? One of my favorite dishes also. I made a decent moussaka a few months ago but haven’t found a pasticcio recipe that looks right yet.

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**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/53 "2000-09-24T17:39:54Z")

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Heres some of my faves:

From a 50’s Betty Crocker cookbook; fried chicken.  
You take some thin chicken breasts or strips (I prefer Perdue), coat them in plain yogurt, then bread them, and fry about 30 minutes.  
The yogurt makes them moist and sweet.

For a side dish, boil some potato pieces, then mash with 1 cup of soy milk; add a package of onion soup powder and a bit of powdered cheese from a macaroni box mix.

Fruit smoothie:  
In a blender, combine a banana, strawberries, some orange juice, soy milk, and tofu. Mix and enjoy!

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![spedmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@spedmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spedmonk)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2000, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/54 "2000-09-24T18:26:46Z")

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**JAMBALAYA!!!**

**What you need:**  
-approximately 1 lb. boneless chicken breast, cubed  
-1 lb. andouille sausage, cubed \*see note at end  
-1 large green bell pepper, diced  
-2-3 stalks celery, diced  
-1 large onion, diced  
-1 large clove garlic, finely chopped  
-1 lb. rice  
-1 small can tomato paste  
-approximately 64 oz. chicken broth  
-1 can chopped tomatoes (optional)  
-cayenne pepper  
-cajun seasoning (optional)

**cooking instructions**  
STEP 1:  
heat 1 tablespoon lard, if you have it, vegetable oil if you dont. Season chicken and sausage with salt and pepper. Add to hot oil and brown.  
STEP 2:  
remove chicken and sausage from pan, but leave the juices in the pan. Add garlic, pepper, celery, and onion. DO NOT BROWN! Cook until translucent. remove from pan.  
STEP 3:  
Put chicken and sausage back in pan, making sure it fully covers the bottom. Layer peppers, onions, celery, and garlic on top. If you are adding chopped tomatoes, add them now. Pour rice on top and spread it out so that it forms an even layer. In a separate dish, combine tomato paste and some of the broth and blend. Add to pan, as well as the remaining broth. DO NOT STIR!!!  
STEP 4:  
Season! Add cayenne pepper and cajun seasoning to taste. I use about 1 tablespoon of cayenne and 1 teaspoon of cajun seasoning. Just keep in mind that the cajun seasoning does have cayenne pepper in it.  
STEP 5:  
Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low. Let simmer, covered, for about an hour. DO NOT STIR!!! It is done when the rice is tender. You can tell when most of the broth is gone. If there is little or no broth left and the rice isn’t done, add some more broth. DO NOT STIR!!!

**notes:**  
-if you can’t get andouille sausage, you can use a good smoked sausage, preferably pork  
-it is very important that you don’t stir this after you add the rice and broth. If you do, the rice rises to the top and does not cook completely…you will have crunchy jambalaya  
-it is also good to use a large stockpot with a heavy bottom, so the chicken and sausage doesn’t burn.  
Enjoy!  
Katie

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/55 "2000-09-25T05:59:34Z")

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**Marinated Shitake Mushrooms with Chevre**

Preparation time: 40 minutes

Serves 4-6 people

**Ingredients** :

1 Dozen shitake mushrooms (large flat ones)  
4 Cloves of garlic  
1/2 Cup of extra virgin olive oil  
1/2 Lb. of French or domestic Chevre

**Preparation** :

One day ahead of time or on the morning before, crush the garlic into the olive oil and mix well. Place the mushrooms in a confined bottle or container and cover with the garlicked oil. Marinate for at least eight hours at room temperature or overnight in the refrigerator.

Drain the mushrooms and bring to room temperature while heating an oven proof skillet on the stove set to medium low heat. Preheat your broiler while you saute the mushrooms. Start the mushrooms gill side down and flip them once they begin to brown or curl at the edges. Continue to saute until they have shrunken by about one quarter of their size. Open the cheese (French Chevre is best and an herbed type may be used if desired but it is not recommended) and place one small coin on each of the mushroom caps. Place in the broiler and watch carefully. You may even turn off the broiler at this point to avoid the chance of burning them.

Drain briefly on paper towels and serve warm. Pairs well with a white Burgundy, Brut Champagne or pinot noir blanc.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/56 "2000-09-25T08:59:29Z")

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Two things:

[li]The mushrooms should be removed from the broiler just before the cheese fully melts. It should just be warmed through.[/li]  
This recipe was cheerfully stolen from **Le Mouton Noir** in Saratoga, CA.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/57 "2000-09-25T10:17:11Z")

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[homer] Mmmmm… Mushrooms and chevre… [/homer]

ok, I’m done wiping drool off my chin, so I can start adding recipes:

Autumn Roasted Squash Soup with Apple Confit  
Serves 6

1 T. olive oil  
1 onion, thinly sliced  
2 T. Calvados or any fine sherry will do  
4 lbs. Winter Squash (pumpkin is good, butternut or acorn even better)  
1/2 cup cream  
2 1/2 to 3 cups vegetable stock  
Salt & white pepper to taste

1 T butter  
2 apples, cored, peeled, and sliced  
2 T Calvados or brandy  
1/2 cup apple juice

Creme Fraiche, as needed

1. Cut squash into halves or quarters, put in a roasting pan skin side up, and roast at 375° until flesh is just tender, and skin is easily taken off with a paring knife. Cut flesh into cubes, and reserve.
2. Heat olive oil in large soup pot, add onion with a little salt and pepper, and saute over a low heat until onions caramelize, about 15 minutes (add a little stock if needed if pan gets too dry). When the onions have browned nicely, deglaze the pan with the Calvados.
3. Add the squash, cream, and enough stock to just cover the squash. Cover and let simmer until squash is very soft.
4. Puree the soup in a blender, and add more stock (or cream, if going for a rich soup). Return soup to pot and simmer again for about 20 minutes. Check seasoning, and add salt & pepper as needed.

For the apple confit:

1. Melt butter in a saute pan, add apples, and toss to cover with butter.
2. When heated through, add Calvados and cook until pan starts to go dry. Add apple juice, cover pan, and let apples cook for about 15 to 20 minutes, until soft. Remove cover and cook an additional 8 to 10 minutes to reduce liquid.
3. Gently mash apples, but not too much so confit retains texture.

Stir in half of the confit into the soup, save the rest for garnish.

Ladle soup into soup plates, top with a spoonful of confit, and a swirl of creme fraiche, if desired.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Oicu812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f475e1/32.png) [@Oicu812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oicu812)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/58 "2000-09-25T11:40:55Z")

</div>

Heat light virgin olive oil in a skillet on medium heat, then carmelize chopped scallions and minced garlic therein.

Add 1 pound of large scallops, cook these halfway, then add 1 pound of large shrimp.

While this is cooking, cut up one half pound of bacon, cut into small strips, and fry in a seperate pan. Once the bacon is almost totally crispy, add in sliced shitake mushrooms and lightly cook them in the bacon grease until the bacon itself is done.

Dish the seafood onto a plate, sprinkle the mushroom/bacon mixture over the top liberally, then drizzle the entire portion with alfredo sauce, either home made, or they sell some rather good sauces in the pasta aisle. Fresh steamed green beans makes a nice addition to the meal…

## O

vidi vici veni!

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/59 "2000-09-25T14:16:59Z")

</div>

Poach an egg or two in that enhanced ramen of yours, and call it breakfast.

A recipe? From me? With NUMBERS? Cooking and dining is an ART, not a SCIENCE, in MY kitchen. Little a this, little a that, swirl it around in the pan, you’ll think you died and gone to heaven.

Don’t talk to me about numbers…only use 'em when we have to around here.

– King Azaz the Unabridged, of Dictionopolis

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**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2000, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-ultimate-recipe-thread/33932/60 "2000-09-25T15:05:56Z")

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**Zenster** about the cheez whiz, I use it 'cause I’m lazy and because it’s possible to cook it in a microwave. I’m trying to learn recipes that can be accomplished with only the use of a microwave, a sink and a mini refridgerator, so I can cook something other than Easy Mac and Chef Boyardee whilst in college. I don’t like ramen so I have to be creative…

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