# The Unofficial Academy Awards Thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 28, 2005, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206 "2005-02-28T00:18:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![TheOnlySaneOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@TheOnlySaneOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheOnlySaneOne)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/61 "2005-02-28T02:48:57Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > What is KEHPS? 😕 _amused_ Capes. As pronounced by Edna Moore. ---
**Author:** ![Zjestika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/8edcca/32.png) [@Zjestika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zjestika)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/62 "2005-02-28T02:49:17Z")
So, Beyonce is singing all the songs? ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/63 "2005-02-28T02:49:42Z")
And now. Beauty and the Beast. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/64 "2005-02-28T02:49:56Z")
I’m only listening and not looking and Pacino _sounded_ fine. I took a look and, WOW! Was he staggering? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/65 "2005-02-28T02:52:01Z")
> [@ronincyberpunk](#): > > So does anyone know what the hell was up with the Chris Rock and Adam Sandler thing? It seemed totally fake, but it was so corny that it also seemed like it had to be planned. > > Anyone else have thoughts? I’d like to think that if Catherine Zeta-Jones was really supposed to be a presenter she dropped out when she found out she’d be presenting with Adam Sandler. Why is Beyonce singing everything? Did every other singer in Hollywood come down with laryngitis? All she’s doing is proving she doesn’t have the vocal range or strength to be singing these songs. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/66 "2005-02-28T02:52:25Z")
How many times is Beyonce going to sing? ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/67 "2005-02-28T02:53:55Z")
Is it time for the Cavalcade of the Dead yet? ---
**Author:** ![easy\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb8c5e/32.png) [@easy\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/easy_e)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/68 "2005-02-28T02:54:22Z")
Ah! Jeremy Irons’s teeth scare me! He is British, though. ---
**Author:** ![Dugrik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Dugrik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dugrik)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/69 "2005-02-28T02:55:11Z")
Another presentation in the aisle. That must suck for the winners. Here you’ve won an Oscar, the pinacle of your career, an event you’ve dreamed of your entire life and they won’t even let you go up to the stage. ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/70 "2005-02-28T02:55:32Z")
> [@gobear](#): > > Al Pacino is _shitfaced_! I thought so! He was staggering a bit and slurred some words. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/71 "2005-02-28T02:55:37Z")
“The dog’s bollocks?” UK Dopers, could we get a translation? ---
**Author:** ![Zjestika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/8edcca/32.png) [@Zjestika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zjestika)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/72 "2005-02-28T02:56:45Z")
Like the Queen’s dress. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/73 "2005-02-28T02:58:28Z")
I love Laura Linney as an actre… er, _actor_, but her hair looks like something sprung from the imagination of H.R. Giger. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/74 "2005-02-28T02:59:34Z")
> [@Zjestika](#): > > Like the Queen’s dress. _snort_ It means “really great.” ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/75 "2005-02-28T03:01:46Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > How many times is Beyonce going to sing? Beyonce is smokin.’ She can sing all night as far as I’m concerned. 🆒 I think she’s lip synching, though. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/76 "2005-02-28T03:02:33Z")
Aww, that Cinematographer’s speech was so sweet. He dedicated the win to his mother who’s in the hospital, thanked the nurses and doctors taking care of her and said “I love you mom”. _sniff_ Take that Mr. Scorcese, no thanks for you! ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/77 "2005-02-28T03:04:05Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > How many times is Beyonce going to sing? Three times. Ugh. At least last year they had the good sense to have [Annie Lennox](http://www.alennox.net/jump800.html) perform. She is wonderful! ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/78 "2005-02-28T03:05:06Z")
As the show goes on, I’m getting more and more tired of Chris Rock. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/79 "2005-02-28T03:05:34Z")
Not a Brit but… Waking up to a blowjob is the dog’s bollocks. Anything that is very good can be the dog’s bollocks. Bollocks are balls BTW. The usual image is a boxer or a pit bull from behind with their big balls hanging. It wouldn’t be a problem on UK TV to say but would be about on the “shit” level of swearing. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2005, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206/80 "2005-02-28T03:07:38Z")
The camera could just stay on Selma for the next two hours and I’ll be happy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-unofficial-academy-awards-thread/292206.md?page=5)