# The Worst Movie Critic in America **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 25, 2014, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527 "2014-03-25T15:47:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![AlsoNamedBort](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alsonamedbort/32/3213_2.png) [@AlsoNamedBort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlsoNamedBort)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/41 "2014-03-25T18:55:00Z")
It doesn’t seem like it’s too hard to get a blog on ChicagoNow: [http://www.chicagonow.com/pitch/](http://www.chicagonow.com/pitch/) ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/42 "2014-03-25T19:00:15Z")
I’ve heard 4th grade, I’ve heard review bots, but perhaps they’re just bad translations? Here’s my scenario as to how Sarah got her job… “Hey, I found a girl who can write reviews for $10/week, 4 movies a week.” “Sign her up.” “Wait… I was joking. This kid is Nigerian and she, Saria, just arrived…” “I don’t care. $10/week? I’ll look great come bonus time. Sign her up, NOW. We can always get Google to translate the rough patches.” “We get bonuses? But our business is dying…” “Want me to find somebody to do your job for $15 a week?” :gulp: “Er, no.” “Then shut up about bonuses and don’t let it get back to me! And, uh, we’ll call her ‘Sarah’. Oh, stop worrying - nobody will tell the difference!” ---
**Author:** ![Labdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Labdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Labdad)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/43 "2014-03-25T19:19:46Z")
Holy crap! Did you see this entry: > [@](#): > > The 10 Best Movies I saw in 2013. > > 1. Hunger Games: Catching Fire > > 2. About Time > > 3. The Book Thief > > 4. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones > > 5. Homefront > > 6. Despicable Me 2 > > 7. 42 > > 8. White House Down > > 9. The Host > > 10. The Wolverine 😕😕 ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/44 "2014-03-25T19:27:54Z")
Wouldn’t the worst critic be one of those sham reviewers who are paid to gush glowingly about even the most dreckish films out there, just to get a copy line on the movie ad? ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/45 "2014-03-25T19:35:09Z")
“What I want for Christmas is a Red Ryder BB Gun with a compass in the stock and this thing which tells time. I think that everybody should have a Red Ryder BB Gun. They’re very good for Christmas. I don’t think that a football is a very good Christmas present.” -Ralphie from A Christmas Story ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/46 "2014-03-25T19:43:10Z")
Sorry, I haven’t gotten to the reviews yet. I haven’t gotten over being pissed about: [INDENT][indent]Hey I’m Sarah. Born and raised in Chicago. I love watching the newest movies before they officially come[/INDENT][/INDENT]out. What the hell, website? Who told you that’s acceptable formatting? ---
**Author:** ![kath94](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@kath94](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kath94)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/47 "2014-03-25T19:46:23Z")
Gah! I just read my first Sarah The Movie Blogger reviews. I think maybe SHE pays THEM for the privilege of posting on chicagonow. Gah! ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/48 "2014-03-25T19:54:08Z")
That’s…impressive. There used to be a reviewer for our local weekly who was pretty bad, but nowhere near this league. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/49 "2014-03-25T19:57:15Z")
I keep hearing these reviews in Dr. Steve Brule’s voice. ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/50 "2014-03-25T19:57:37Z")
Actually, digging into it a little, it turns out ChicagoNow is a community blog site owned by the Sun Times. Nobody there is a professional journalist (or they don’t need to be). Still, the bloggers have to pitch their stuff to the administrators, and someone thought that Sarah’s stuff was worthwhile. I guess. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/51 "2014-03-25T20:05:45Z")
Wow, Jackie Harvey is become flesh and walks among us. ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/52 "2014-03-25T20:59:59Z")
I was about to ask people to take it easy on some 15 year old making a post. After all, some people come into their own later than others. Apparently, she has a BA in photography. Carry on. ---
**Author:** ![Flywheel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Flywheel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flywheel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/53 "2014-03-25T21:02:38Z")
> [@OneCentStamp](#): > > Wow, Jackie Harvey is become flesh and walks among us. She sounds more like Archie “Arch” Danielson. ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/54 "2014-03-25T21:14:47Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > Sorry, I haven’t gotten to the reviews yet. I haven’t gotten over being pissed about: > [INDENT][indent]Hey I’m Sarah. Born and > raised in Chicago. I love > watching the newest movies > before they officially come[/INDENT][/INDENT]out. > > What the hell, website? Who told you that’s acceptable formatting? When I first saw the page I saw it as: Hey I’m Sarah. Born and raised in Chicago. I love watching the newest movies before they officially come I spent a good amount of time wondering what an unofficial come would be like for a movie. > [@h.sapiens](#): > > Actually, digging into it a little, it turns out ChicagoNow is a community blog site owned by the Sun Times. The Tribune, not the Sun-Times. They’re rivals. And the Sun-Times is the owner of the Dope. Which would you rather have on your corporate resume, the SDMB or Sarah the Movie Critic? I found Sarah because I was referred to her by a sidebar on a serious news page on the Tribune site. As far as I’m concerned, that makes her an official comer for the Tribune. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/55 "2014-03-25T21:28:21Z")
OK, hold on. In [this](http://www.chicagonow.com/sarah-takes-on-movies/2013/10/diane-keaton-at-the-movies/) picture from last October she looks like she’s about 13. It still doesn’t explain the writing style: > [@](#): > > I saw Diane Keaton at the movie theater in downtown Chicago. She was there watching a movie. She was really nice and let me take a picture with her. That’s the accompanying text of a stick figure drawing where you practice writing cursive on paper with giant gridlines. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/56 "2014-03-25T21:35:45Z")
In before she’s mentally retarded and everyone feels like an asshole. ---
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/57 "2014-03-25T21:46:16Z")
Hahahahahah. I love that the state of the thread is that she could be [ol] [li]13[/li][li]retarded[/li][li]both[/li][/ol] ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/58 "2014-03-25T21:50:14Z")
> [@marshmallow](#): > > In before she’s mentally retarded and everyone feels like an asshole. Sounds like most of the pit threads started here. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/59 "2014-03-25T21:56:28Z")
> [@marshmallow](#): > > In before she’s mentally retarded and everyone feels like an asshole. Do you know something? She knows you, apparently. She mentioned you in a review: [Quote=Sara] Marshmallows you will be happy to see the cast of Veronica Mars again up on the big screen this time. [/quote] The fact she added the final, incorrect ‘s’ is just her writing style.🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527/60 "2014-03-25T22:04:11Z")
[Another pic of her](http://www.chicagonow.com/sarah-takes-on-movies/2014/03/divergent/) in her review of _Divergent_. I’m terrible at judging ages, but I guess she’d be in her early twenties. I want to believe this thing is a put on. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-worst-movie-critic-in-america/684527.md?page=4)