# The ZPG Zealot handshake thread party extravaganza **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 29, 2016, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713 "2016-06-29T16:14:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/201 "2016-07-01T00:08:47Z")
I’d like to shake hands with all of you. That are consenting, of course. \< waggles eyebrows \> ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/202 "2016-07-01T00:12:21Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > That said, I actually agree that the handshake ideally ought to be replaced in American etiquette with some other egalitarian gesture of mutual respect that doesn’t involve actual touching of another person. A sight upward nod of the head, accompanied by a cordial “'Sup?” ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/203 "2016-07-01T00:20:43Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I’d like to shake hands with all of you. That are consenting, of course. > > \< waggles eyebrows \> Can one truly consent in an environment of male supremacy established by the patriarchy? Isn’t the power differential too great? ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/204 "2016-07-01T00:27:26Z")
Kimstu, thus my earlier mention of gloves. I mean, duh. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/205 "2016-07-01T00:36:06Z")
> [@andros](#): > > A sight upward nod of the head, accompanied by a cordial “'Sup?” And if you’re a white ‘Dad’ type, you have to say _ **'Sup, Hohhhmes?** _ as ebonically as possible, while flashing gang signs that you’re just making up on the spot. Or while waggling your eyebrows… ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/206 "2016-07-01T00:36:26Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I’d like to shake hands with all of you. That are consenting, of course. > > \< waggles eyebrows \> We’re both women, so… are you amBIdextrous? ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/207 "2016-07-01T00:36:34Z")
Hey, it’s [National Handshake Day](http://www.nationaldaycalendar.com/national-handshake-day-last-thursday-in-june/)! Be sure to wear your gloves, everybody! ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/208 "2016-07-01T00:37:16Z")
> [@andros](#): > > A sight upward nod of the head, accompanied by a cordial “'Sup?” Sure. Though I confess I rather like the notion of the “self-shake”, clasping the right thumb in the left fist while smilingly inclining the head. The self-consciously “masculine” form of that could involve raising the elbows with a bit of a pec flex, while the “ladylike” version keeps the hands modestly lowered. (I figure we’ll have an easier time selling a new ritual if it’s clear we can still use it for the same sexist gender stereotyping traditionally applied to handshakes.) And then the original handshake would evolve into an occasional behavioral flourish combining old-fashioned formality with audacious intimacy, the way that hand-kissing is still occasionally used nowadays. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/209 "2016-07-01T00:39:52Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > Can one truly consent in an environment of male supremacy established by the patriarchy? Isn’t the power differential too great? 1. No 2. Yes Unpossible! The only reasonable solution is female infanticide to prevent their imminent rape, molestation, enslavement and murder. At least that is the message that I got out of this thread. I might have mixed up some of the wisdom given though. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/210 "2016-07-01T00:55:06Z")
Never thought I’d ever share the world with somebody who equates handshaking with rape. Maybe the “Zero Population Growth” part of her name anticipates handshakes leading to babies? What gets me is that ZPGZ will start describing a nice, normal everyday slice of life then instantly turn it into a nightmare of sexual depredation. She described her early years of school as having a point where the school administrators all the sudden decided it was OK for boys to touch girls and from then on she faced endless molestation. Just how does that happen in a normal society, regardless of culture? Is this how she counsels rape victims? “I’ve suffered as much as you, fellow rape victim. Men are constantly trying to shake my hand and I feel so _violated_!” ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/211 "2016-07-01T01:10:20Z")
The [obvious solution](http://i.imgur.com/Uu03QdG.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/212 "2016-07-01T01:23:41Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > Kimstu, thus my earlier mention of gloves. I mean, duh. Aka, “hand condoms”. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/213 "2016-07-01T01:31:44Z")
> [@Azeotrope](#): > > We’re both women, so… are you amBIdextrous? Well, as a female photographer, I’d definitely say I’m into digital manipulation. Does that count? And should I waffle some more? ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/214 "2016-07-01T02:02:07Z")
> [@andros](#): > > A sight upward nod of the head, accompanied by a cordial “'Sup?” “U up? Netflix and formal introduction?” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/215 "2016-07-01T02:18:12Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > The [obvious solution](http://i.imgur.com/Uu03QdG.jpg). I hope it’s semaphore!\* _clicks link_ I am sad. \*We can call it call it sexillology! ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/216 "2016-07-01T02:22:44Z")
We had one. His screen name was **Kal**. He was a great guy, a fun poster, and I miss him. For many years, if you had a question about the Roma he was the one you went to. Don’t misunderstand. He didn’t constantly talk about it or inject it into every conversation. It was just known as one of his areas of expertise. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/217 "2016-07-01T02:35:48Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > “Psycho” may be too strong a word, but not by much. At the very least, it’s a reminder that the intensity of sincerity of a belief is unrelated to its truth or validity, or to its being owed accommodation. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/218 "2016-07-01T04:06:48Z")
> [@octopus](#): > > Can one truly consent in an environment of male supremacy established by the patriarchy? Isn’t the power differential too great? Poe’s Law… :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/219 "2016-07-01T04:49:18Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > I’d like to shake hands with all of you. That are consenting, of course. > > \< waggles eyebrows \> I’m going to start a ZPG porn emporium called Shake Shack. A guy in college had the habit of putting out his hand to shake then withdrawing it to scratch his ear. We thought he was obnoxious, but I suppose he was a proto-hand-feminist. ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2016, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713/220 "2016-07-01T04:54:16Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > We had one. His screen name was **Kal**. And he addressed this issue [very briefly](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=13379505&postcount=485) in the last great **ZPG** [Pit thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=593049). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-zpg-zealot-handshake-thread-party-extravaganza/758713.md?page=12)