# There is not one single thing wrong with buttered saltines.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [October 28, 2012, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091 "2012-10-28T01:09:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/1 "2012-10-28T01:09:52Z")
That is all.
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### Author:  [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/2 "2012-10-28T01:13:36Z")
Feeling a trifle defensive, are we?
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### Author:  [@Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Curiosity_Kills_Her)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/3 "2012-10-28T01:14:38Z")
I agree! My dad taught me to eat them that way with chili.
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### Author:  [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/4 "2012-10-28T01:18:08Z")
The only thing wrong is the missed opportunity to have the far superior cream cheese on saltines, instead.
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### Author:  [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/5 "2012-10-28T01:19:07Z")
Except for the saltines and butter that is.
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### Author:  [@Mr.Me](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Me)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/6 "2012-10-28T01:44:50Z")
Should one use salted or unsalted butter on saltines?
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### Author:  [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/7 "2012-10-28T01:48:04Z")
I read the title as buttered **satellites**.
I was very confused.
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### Author:  [@Vicullum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vicullum)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/8 "2012-10-28T01:48:52Z")
I was really surprised when I recently learned there are other people who do this. Although in my case I use margarine.
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### Author:  [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/9 "2012-10-28T02:08:49Z")
Can’t you just skip the middle man and buy Club crackers? Those are basically saltines with the butter baked in.
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/10 "2012-10-28T02:12:00Z")
> [@bouv](#):
>
> Can’t you just skip the middle man and buy Club crackers? Those are basically saltines with the butter baked in.
No way! Not even close.
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/11 "2012-10-28T02:15:18Z")
If you eat them with asparagus they make your pee smell like asparagus. Course, so does just asparagus.
Okay, they’re hard to eat underwater.
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### Author:  [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/12 "2012-10-28T02:16:09Z")
Who the fuck eats saltines _without_ butter?
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### Author:  [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/13 "2012-10-28T02:18:22Z")
Love, love, love saltines with butter. My dad and I used to eat them as a snack when I was a wee child. We don’t have saltines very often in our house, but when we do. I eat them with butter and it makes me happy.
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### Author:  [@dzeiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dzeiger)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/14 "2012-10-28T02:28:38Z")
> [@Jragon](#):
>
> I read the title as buttered **satellites**.
>
> I was very confused.
I read it as buttered **sardines** and was a bit confused as well.
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### Author:  [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/15 "2012-10-28T02:33:29Z")
Buttered Triscuits are better 😃
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### Author:  [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/16 "2012-10-28T02:40:54Z")
with peanut butter they are a meal.
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### Author:  [@LVBoPeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LVBoPeep)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/17 "2012-10-28T02:51:13Z")
Mmm…buttered saltines dipped in tomato soup. That is all.
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### Author:  [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/18 "2012-10-28T03:02:26Z")
> [@voltaire](#):
>
> The only thing wrong is the missed opportunity to have the far superior cream cheese on saltines, instead.
Cream cheese on saltines sounds pretty good. 🙂
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### Author:  [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/19 "2012-10-28T03:05:44Z")
> [@zoid](#):
>
> Who the fuck eats saltines _without_ butter?
I do. Can’t stand the taste of cold butter - I only put it on things that are hot enough to melt it.
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### Author:  [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)
#### Post date: [October 28, 2012, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-is-not-one-single-thing-wrong-with-buttered-saltines/639091/20 "2012-10-28T03:09:02Z")
> [@zoid](#):
>
> Who the fuck eats saltines _without_ butter?
I do.
In fact, the only saltines I ever eat are those that are served to me in a family-style diner, such as Denny’s, Carrow’s, Keno’s, and such. And then I only eat them by crumbling them up on top of soup or salad.
Unlike leavened bread products (such as white bread or rolls), saltines don’t really have any way of absorbing the butter. It’s like putting a waxy coating on the cracker. Nothing wrong with the flavor, but if I’m going to spread a coating on a saltine, it will be made of peanut butter.
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