# There was an old lady who swallowed a fly... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 15, 2002, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394 "2002-10-15T20:32:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/21 "2002-10-16T20:04:44Z")
Following **NardoPolo** ’s lead… I know an old lady who swallowed a sink. She licked her lips and said “what do you think?” I said with a frown, as I pulled her pants down, “now how do you expect me to get a cold drink?” How about… I know an old lady who swallowed a Lincoln… ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/22 "2002-10-16T20:20:58Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a Lincoln, What had she been drinkin, To swallow a Lincoln? She wasn’t thinkin. I know an old lady who swallowed a sword… ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/23 "2002-10-16T20:57:38Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a sword, Silly old broad, to swallow a sword! She said she was bored, So she swallowed a sword. I know an old lady who swallowed an elk… ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/24 "2002-10-16T22:57:55Z")
And she warshed it doon with a gluss of melk. I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith… ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/25 "2002-10-16T23:14:32Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith He tasted like chicken she said on the bite fifth Naked in a henhouse cept a helmet that’s a might pith She’s quite the key for entertaining the cocks with. I know an old woman that swallowed a Vega… ---
**Author:** ![RadioWave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RadioWave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RadioWave)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/26 "2002-10-16T23:18:18Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a locksmith… She liked Star Trek Spockless, Amidst talk of apocolypse. There was an old lady who swallowed a Frisbee… ---
**Author:** ![RadioWave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RadioWave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RadioWave)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2002, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/27 "2002-10-16T23:22:27Z")
…Damnéd coworkers delaying while I’m trying to post… You win _this time_ **lieu**. There was an old woman who swallowed a Vega Or an Opel Omega Driving past Noriega Who it happened was running a race in Talladega ---
**Author:** ![Kyomara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8edcca/32.png) [@Kyomara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyomara)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/28 "2002-10-17T02:08:47Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a frisbee… She leaned in to kizz me, And I crammed in that frisbee… I know an old lady who swallowed a parrot… ---
**Author:** ![Snugglebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snugglebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snugglebear)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/29 "2002-10-17T06:33:14Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a parrot… She SWALLOWED a PARROT? Oh why not a ferret, in a stew with a carrot? I know an old lady who swallowed a stick… ---
**Author:** ![Largo62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@Largo62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Largo62)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/30 "2002-10-17T06:50:14Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a stick. She swallowed it rather than give it a lick. She wound up pooping a huge toothpick! I know an old lady who swallowed a barn… ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/31 "2002-10-17T07:06:56Z")
Frikkin **Geezer** , I’ve got to stop laughing before I can post… I know an old lady who swallowed a barn About the livestock she gave not a darn Tis funny the only thing she managed to garn Was an asshole protusion that resembled red yarn. There was an old lady that swallowed a Hummer… ---
**Author:** ![NardoPolo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecae2f/32.png) [@NardoPolo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NardoPolo)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/32 "2002-10-17T10:34:14Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a hummer oh what a bummer to swallow a hummer She needed the help of the local plumber she’d never done anything dumber (except maybe that number with the chummer strummer last summer…) There was an old lady who swallowed a lake… ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/33 "2002-10-17T10:46:44Z")
You know. Considering what flies are generally found buzzing about and her M.O. from the other animals she’s swallowed I could probably make an educated guess about why she swallowed the fly. … If you’re playing the game see the previous post. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/34 "2002-10-17T11:00:58Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed a lake. Such a thirst to slake! To swallow a lake! I know an old lady who swallowed an **orange**. . . ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/35 "2002-10-17T11:21:56Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed an Orange She turned **purple** And stayed like that for a **month** But at least she didn’t swallow a **wasp**. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/36 "2002-10-17T11:34:49Z")
The End? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/37 "2002-10-17T11:53:37Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed the universe… ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/38 "2002-10-17T14:20:36Z")
This one calls for **Cartooniverse**. ---
**Author:** ![Algernon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a183cd/32.png) [@Algernon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algernon)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/39 "2002-10-17T15:09:07Z")
I know an old lady who swallowed the universe. When I asked her why, her answer was terse. “Astronomers ask, will it expand or contract? But neither approach is the actual fact. For I am God and this is the Big Bang in reverse.” ---
**Author:** ![Largo62](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@Largo62](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Largo62)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394/40 "2002-10-17T16:40:29Z")
God? You know a _ **very** _ old lady! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/there-was-an-old-lady-who-swallowed-a-fly/132394.md?page=3)