# There's clueless, then there's "how do you remember how to breathe" clueless **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 28, 2024, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938 "2024-09-28T08:44:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/21 "2024-09-28T14:52:32Z")
I once saw a couple of professional movers, moving a couch down the stairs. You wouldn’t think that there’d be a minimum intelligence requirement for furniture movers, but the one guy apparently didn’t understand that, in order to carry something, you had to lift it up and then walk while it was lifted. His partner showed admirable patience in trying to explain it to him. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/22 "2024-09-28T14:53:03Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > My father used to say that you needed to take an intelligence test to get into OCS, and you had to fail it. Now Ed flunked out of second grade and never finished school He doesn’t know a shelter-half from an entrenching tool But he’s going to be a big success He heads his class at OCS It makes a fellow proud to be a soldier - Tom Lehrer ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/23 "2024-09-28T15:29:11Z")
lol. It’s especially bad that 2 people seemed to have taken vows of silence. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/24 "2024-09-28T15:52:45Z")
Watched a woman backing out of a parking spot. Instead of turning while backing, she backed straight till almost hitting the vehicle directly behind her. Then then tried to turn but couldn’t make the turn due to the length of my pickup, a fairly long Silverado 1500. She went back and forth about 6 times before having enough room to leave. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/25 "2024-09-28T15:55:01Z")
> [@Stratocaster](#): > > nary a “Hey! It’s taken!” Or just flush? Should get the point across. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/26 "2024-09-28T16:02:21Z")
> [@Moonrise](#): > > I’m looking for people who lack the most basic understanding of how reality works, things that we expect kids to master by the time they leave kindergarten. Truly mystified why you failed to utter a word while getting irritated annd pissed off which as you know is not conducive to releasing a BM and expected the guy in need of a toilet to read your mind? That’s clueless. ---
**Author:** ![robby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robby/32/11048_2.png) [@robby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robby)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/27 "2024-09-28T16:19:32Z")
> [@chela](#): > > > [@Moonrise](#): > > > > I’m looking for people who lack the most basic understanding of how reality works, things that we expect kids to master by the time they leave kindergarten. > > Truly mystified why you failed to utter a word while getting irritated annd pissed off which as you know is not conducive to releasing a BM and expected the guy in need of a toilet to read your mind? That’s clueless. Exactly. Maybe the reason the guy was so persistent was because he assumed that if there was actually a person in there they would have said something by then. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/28 "2024-09-28T16:28:40Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > the one guy apparently didn’t understand that, in order to carry something, you had to lift it up and then walk while it was lifted I once had to move a couch from one spot in the living room to another spot. My friend Jeff was visiting and we were smoking and drinking. I asked if he’d help me move the couch. I cleared the couch’s new location and was ready to go. I lifted my end, but Jeff’s end appeared to be caught on something. I went to his end and lifted it, thinking I’d freed it. Jeff went to the other end and now that end wouldn’t budge. The couch was a sleeper model and was heavy. After repeatedly switching ends, we both eventually realized he couldn’t lift it and we both started laughing like the fools we were. ---
**Author:** ![robby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robby/32/11048_2.png) [@robby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robby)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/29 "2024-09-28T16:29:49Z")
> [@teelabrown](#): > > Our shared-wall neighbors are among the stupidest people anywhere. Their dumbfuckery is too long to list, but here’s one: > > When they moved in twenty years ago, there was a big handsome Japanese maple in the center of the front yard. Their house, our house, and all the homes in this neighborhood came equipped with automatic sprinkler systems for our yards. There’s a big plastic box in the garage labeled something like “AUTOMATIC SPRINKLER SYSTEM”. It’s super-easy to work, and theirs was working fine for the immediately previous neighbor. But these guys apparently couldn’t make the connection between that big box in the garage and getting the front yard watered. First they let the lawn die from lack of water, then the beautiful Japanese maple got starved out. The HOA got after them for having a dead neglected yard, and then you’d see the homeowner out front once in awhile manually (and sullenly) watering the dead lawn with a hose. She didn’t do it very often, though, and the last remaining struggling bushes all eventually died too. > > Then one day we overheard them on their driveway excitedly talking about what they had just noticed in their own garage after four or five years of residence: an automatic sprinkler system! Who’d have thought it! Later that day we heard their system chug to life. Eventually their lawn re-greened, but nothing else has been replaced. Also wondering why it was so hard over the course of 4-5 years to mention the sprinkler system to the neighbor. Not sure where you live, but they may have simply assumed that natural rainfall would be sufficient for the lawn and the tree. It’s obvious they didn’t notice the sprinkler control box in the garage. That was their bad luck to be so unobservant. But then again not everyone is as [lucky as you](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Known_Space_characters#Teela_Brown). 😉 ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/30 "2024-09-28T16:46:30Z")
A minor example, but: In a grocery store parking lot. As I pulled into a space i saw a woman getting into a car. Ahead of her the facing space was empty and she could easily have driven through it to leave. She backed out. ---
**Author:** ![teelabrown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/teelabrown/32/8412_2.png) [@teelabrown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teelabrown)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/31 "2024-09-28T17:11:03Z")
> [@robby](#): > > Also wondering why it was so hard over the course of 4-5 years to mention the sprinkler system to the neighbor. A combination of these two things: we were on terrible terms with them for reasons too long to list here, and we had a morbid fascination with just how long it would take them to notice their own clearly-labeled sprinkler system. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/32 "2024-09-28T17:19:18Z")
I sometimes back out as I know how mommio andrettis like to speed thru parking lots. I witnessed a lady creeping creeping forward out of a parking space and at the last minute some clueless woman sped by and took off the forward pulling car’s bumper. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/33 "2024-09-28T17:19:19Z")
I had a CO who told me that the EPA was coming to the base to look for leaking chemicals and the like and to have my guys hide the barrels sitting in our parking lot. My unvoiced thought: “You may be a fucking moron, but I’m certainly not that stupid.” I refused an order for the first time in my career. More recently, we went to lunch with a group of people who live in the building. One woman ordered a tossed salad for lunch. When it arrived she told the waiter: “You can take this back. I only eat iceberg lettuce. Give it to someone else.” Mentioning that requirement up-front was apparently too difficult for her. And that food goes directly into the trash bin, dummy. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/34 "2024-09-28T17:25:17Z")
That does make some sense for backing out, although then you can’t even see an oncoming vehicle as you creep out – especially when, like me, you have a car that’s smaller than the behemoth SUVs parked on either side of you. At least when pulling forward you can keep an eye out for anything approaching. ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/35 "2024-09-28T17:26:43Z")
> [@TXRebel](#): > > I agree. I always just say “Occupied” Done. No more drama. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/GC4gKA0tNaQ/hqdefault.jpg "outhouse scene True Grit") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GC4gKA0tNaQ) ---
**Author:** ![liirogue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dbc845/32.png) [@liirogue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/liirogue)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/36 "2024-09-28T17:30:08Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > A minor example, but: In a grocery store parking lot. As I pulled into a space i saw a woman getting into a car. Ahead of her the facing space was empty and she could easily have driven through it to leave. > > She backed out. I stopped doing that because I saw an accident in a parking lot once. A woman was driving forward through the empty space across from her spot just as a man whipped into the spot going way too fast. Caused a surprising amount of damage on both cars. My contribution - I used to work with a guy that needed to use a calculator to multiply a number by 10 or 100. And he was an accountant! ---
**Author:** ![vbob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vbob/32/4439_2.png) [@vbob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vbob)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/37 "2024-09-28T17:34:30Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I once had to move a couch from one spot in the living room to another spot. My friend Jeff was visiting and we were smoking and drinking. I was helping some friends move out of a second floor apartment, with those cursed winding stairs… The friends were identical twin sisters - each easily lifted one end of a couch - but they could NOT manage to move the ends in opposite directions. I took over one end, and sister A acted as spotter - we threaded it down the stairs in about 2 minutes. Then they simultaneously collapsed in hysterical laughter - ‘you should see us trying to dance together!’ ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/38 "2024-09-28T17:35:41Z")
Nothing to add other than another person who can’t understand why the OP didn’t say anything to announce their presence. Hell, coulda even said something insulting, since they felt it so appropriate. Of course, OP has not been back. Perhaps they are mute… ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/39 "2024-09-28T17:48:19Z")
If the car backing out was produced after 2018 then it had a rear view camera and most likley also had vehicle detection system. Makes backing out a lot safer than sticking your nose out while waiting to see if you get clipped. My newer cars have had all around view cameras. I now glide in and out of all spots easily. I was at the University of Michigan right in front of dorms three weeks ago with parents in huge SUVs everywhere and was able to park and exit tight spots with no issues. While I witnessed several flustered mom and dad types trying herky jerkey to get in and out of spots. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2024, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/40 "2024-09-28T18:04:07Z")
No, the sound of the flushing toilet would give him the impression that you were about to come out, so then he would stand there for a few minutes, then try the handle again. In case the toilet had flushed itself. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938.md?page=3)