# There's clueless, then there's "how do you remember how to breathe" clueless **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 28, 2024, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938 "2024-09-28T08:44:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Kelby2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ebca7d/32.png) [@Kelby2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kelby2)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/121 "2024-09-30T18:32:48Z")
> [@ZonexandScout](#): > > I worked as a college student in a Modern Language Center (language lab and library) where the manager (40s male) had an ongoing issue with constipation. He was in a stall very often. It took about a week for me to realize that “Take this to Bruce in his office” actually meant that I (male) needed to take a memo or form for the administrative staff (all female) into the restroom and pass it under the stall door. It also frequently meant that I had to converse with him and/or get his signature. This didn’t happen from time to time…this happened several times a week for almost four years. > > When he heard the door to the bathroom open, he would usually yell out “Second stall!” to speed things up. Holy crap! Is that in any way normal…for him or the staff? Seems like something to discuss with your doctor ---
**Author:** ![ZonexandScout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zonexandscout/32/544_2.png) [@ZonexandScout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZonexandScout)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/122 "2024-09-30T18:55:23Z")
He was in there probably 20 to 30 minutes at a time two or three times a day. It only seemed more frequent because he would wander around the office otherwise, readily within distance to just hand him something. It was bizarre at first, but I got used to it. There were certain things he had to sign off on before they could proceed, including equipment rentals. ---
**Author:** ![Kelevra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/97f17d/32.png) [@Kelevra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kelevra)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/123 "2024-09-30T19:19:57Z")
I’ve mentioned this elsewhere but there was the guy from marketing who wanted to know if a kilogram was bigger than a kilometer. he knew one was weight and the other distance. But one had to be bigger than the other. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/124 "2024-09-30T20:29:10Z")
This recent hurricane brought up a memory of my folks who lived in Florida for 65 years or so. They had hurricane experience and detested the hype and alarm from the local news surrounding a hurricane watch. So they’d use their computer to follow NOAA ‘s predictions. I forget which storm but it was projected to hit somewhere along the E coast of Fl. Mom fired up her pc and kept the NOAA site on. They were also expecting company at the end of the week. When their guests arrived they were concerned with the situation and puzzled why my folks were just chilling out and not making preparations. My folks pointed at the computer and said what’s the big deal that storm is still suspended out in The Atlantic O. This is their clueless part- their guest went to the computer and refreshed the computer. Took a good couple of minutes to bring up the site again. Bam big trouble ahead They were a week behind updates! Now the storm was a cat3 hurricane heading directly toward them, shocked they all were. Iirc they had to ride out the storm in the Jax airport. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/125 "2024-09-30T21:06:40Z")
Not in civil aviation, or very rarely. I’ve seen it on much older documents, from companies that also did military aircraft, but not on anything more recent (and by that I mean, like, 40ish years!). Up, down, left, right, forward and aft. Certainly more specific terms like fuselage station, water line, and buttock line, but even BL is indicated Left and Right (LBL, RBL) in pretty much anything I’ve worked on. The concept remains the same. Dude was just an utter moron. He also once argued me on a design detail that he was certain about, because he’d “read the compliance report” and I had a freaking awesome moment when I got to say “really, I wrote it, and it definitely didn’t contain X”. I never did figure out what report he claimed to have read! ---
**Author:** ![Jaycat.again](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaycat.again/32/11525_2.png) [@Jaycat.again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaycat.again)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2024, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/126 "2024-09-30T22:35:58Z")
> [@ZonexandScout](#): > > He was in there probably 20 to 30 minutes at a time two or three times a day. Bring prunes, not memos. ---
**Author:** ![robby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robby/32/11048_2.png) [@robby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robby)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2024, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/127 "2024-10-01T18:52:49Z")
> [@chela](#): > > This recent hurricane brought up a memory of my folks who lived in Florida for 65 years or so. They had hurricane experience and detested the hype and alarm from the local news surrounding a hurricane watch. So they’d use their computer to follow NOAA ‘s predictions. There’s also the people who look at the expanding cone of uncertainty as representing the outer limits of the storm itself (or its effects) instead of the outer limits of the _center of the storm itself_ as it moves. In other words, they think that if they are outside the cone they erroneously think the storm will not affect them at all. NOAA has now added a caveat that states: “ **The cone contains the probable path of the storm center but does not show the size of the storm. Hazardous conditions can occur outside of the cone.** ” But of course people don’t read… ---
**Author:** ![pirviii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pirviii/32/3233_2.png) [@pirviii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pirviii)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/128 "2024-10-02T06:09:16Z")
> [@Kelevra](#): > > But one had to be bigger than the other. The kilogram is heavier, but the kilometer is longer. ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/129 "2024-10-02T06:36:51Z")
The kilometer is bigger than the kilogram. Bigger by one letter. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/130 "2024-10-02T10:54:55Z")
> [@Kelevra](#): > > there was the guy from marketing who wanted to know if a kilogram was bigger than a kilometer. It depends… a kilogram of what ? ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/131 "2024-10-02T11:29:06Z")
I am surprised that no one mentioned the elevator (note the US terminology) button presser. I am on floor six waiting to go down on one of the two elevators, having pressed the down button, and someone comes and presses it again. _Do they assume I am too stupid to do it myself?_ Then to compound the stupidity, they press the up button. I am not sure what the thinking behind this is - do they assume it will get them down faster? An elevator arrives, already full of people and luggage and they muscle their way in to join them on their journey up. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/132 "2024-10-02T11:41:43Z")
Well we had one young guy who insisted that you can’t convert pounds to kilograms, because pounds are a unit of force, not mass. He would insist on saying “a mass that exerts a pound of force”. Unfortunately we were working for the US division of a Canadian company, so this conversation was required all the time. He had other pedantic tendencies (e.g. his war on verbing nouns) and a seeming inability to read an org chart that made him unsuitable for the corporate world. I see from LinkedIn that he’s been employed at his family’s business for the past few years, after bouncing around several jobs. He had a degree from a college that was a pioneer in catering to what we now call neurodivergent students. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/133 "2024-10-02T16:20:02Z")
> [@pjd](#): > > It depends… a kilogram of what ? Yeah. You need to be specific. If you’re, say, painting a centerline down the street, I’d guess that a kilometer of centerline paint is probably heavier than a kilogram. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/134 "2024-10-02T16:41:00Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > Yeah. You need to be specific. If you’re, say, painting a centerline down the street, I’d guess that a kilometer of centerline paint is probably heavier than a kilogram. Well sure. heavier than a kilogram of feathers. ---
**Author:** ![bobsmom101](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobsmom101/32/2867_2.png) [@bobsmom101](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobsmom101)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/135 "2024-10-02T17:31:41Z")
Many moons ago I encountered an _engineer_ FFS, who mansplained me for saying the sun & earth were about 93 million miles apart. According to him, astronomical distances could only be measured accurately in SI units (e.g. kilometers). I have always hoped he was never responsible for anything important. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/136 "2024-10-02T17:59:47Z")
> [@bobsmom101](#): > > According to him, astronomical distances could only be measured accurately in SI units (e.g. kilometers). You shoulda told him it’s 87.9 billion smoots. > [@Tell us an interesting random fact you stumbled across (Part 2)](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tell-us-an-interesting-random-fact-you-stumbled-across-part-2/1004785/534): > > When it comes to obscure units of measurement, I’m partial to the [smoot](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smoot). ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/137 "2024-10-02T18:04:41Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > Well we had one young guy who insisted that you can’t convert pounds to kilograms, because pounds are a unit of force, not mass. > > He would insist on saying “a mass that exerts a pound of force”. Unfortunately we were working for the US division of a Canadian company, so this conversation was required all the time. Maybe he confused the pound with the (kilo)pond? > **[Kilogram-force](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kilogram-force)** > > The kilogram-force (kgf or kgF), or kilopond (kp, from Latin: pondus, lit. 'weight'), is a non-standard gravitational metric unit of force. It is not accepted for use with the International System of Units (SI) and is deprecated for most uses.\[citation needed\] The kilogram-force is equal to the magnitude of the force exerted on one kilogram of mass in a 9.80665 m/s2 gravitational field (standard gravity, a conventional value approximating the average magnitude of gravity on Earth). That is, The g... ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/138 "2024-10-02T19:11:06Z")
> [@bob\_2](#): > > I am on floor six waiting to go down on one of the two elevators, having pressed the down button, and someone comes and presses it again. _Do they assume I am too stupid to do it myself?_ > > Then to compound the stupidity, they press the up button. This is at least sometimes cultural. In Jakarta, which is filled with skyscrapers, it is customary to hit both the up and down buttons every time another person joins the queue, in the mistaken belief that it will somehow bring an elevator car faster. (Of course this only applies n buildings with the older kind of elevator control panels - a lot of the newer buildings have the computer-controlled ones where you tell it “I want to go to floor N” and then you’re told which elevator in the bank will take you there). It’s somewhat akin to people driving at night with their headlights off in the mistaken belief that they are saving gas (a popular misconception in both Egypt and Indonesia). In other words, it’s pretty dumb, but if it is commonly held to be fact, you might not stop to think about it much. ---
**Author:** ![bobsmom101](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobsmom101/32/2867_2.png) [@bobsmom101](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobsmom101)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/139 "2024-10-02T19:21:34Z")
> [@Machine\_Elf](#): > > You shoulda told him it’s 87.9 billion smoots. 👍 👏Perfect! Sadly. about 40 years too late for a snappy comeback. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2024, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938/140 "2024-10-02T19:32:59Z")
Pushing the up and the down buttons is pointless. But a lot of people act is if pushing one of them a lot of times will make the elevator arrive faster. Some people think it actually makes it seem as if it’s taking longer but it will arrive at the same time. They’re wrong, the elevator electronics detect this and it will take more time to arrive. Based on the number of times and the rate the button is pushed it may make extra stops at floors, take longer to close doors (even longer if someone in the elevator pushes the close button), and it may even reverse direction and go all the way up or down before coming back to your floor. It also takes longer if you push down above the first floor because it knows you want to go home. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theres-clueless-then-theres-how-do-you-remember-how-to-breathe-clueless/1007938.md?page=8)