# THEY"RE ALL INSANE!!!!!!!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [April 15, 2000, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023 "2000-04-15T06:22:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 14
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)
#### Post date: [April 15, 2000, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/1 "2000-04-15T06:22:00Z")
For the past hour or so, I have been following links off the site [Portal of Evil](http://www.portalofevil.com/), and have come to the conclusion that the world is made up of people who are completely nuts. It’s not like this is new to me, it just struck me with more force than usual. For example, I found the following:
> [@](#):
>
> HOW MANY OF U , EVER THOUGHT, GEE ZIPPOBOY, I LIKE SUBSTANCE ABUSE AND ALL, BUT I COULD NEVER, EVER BRING MYSELF TO DO ANYTHING ILLEAGAL, JUST FOR A CHEMICAL HIGH. WELL, NOW THERE’Z A CURE FOR THE COMMON PARANOIA, D.X.M.
>
> FROM THE MAKERS OF CAFFIENE AND NICOTINE, KOMES DXM, A NEW WAY TO GET WASTED/ THAT IZN’T ILLEAGAL. DXM, IZ A CHEMICAL SIMILAR TO AN OPIATE THAT PRODUCES A NUMBING BUZZ, OR EVEN HALLUCINATIONS, AND IZ FOUND IN SEVERAL COUGH SUPPRESENTZ----STEP 1. GO TO YER CONER DRUG STORE AND LOOK FOR EITHER, CORRICIDEN - COUGH AND COLD, ROBATUSSIN DM, OR COUGH SUPPRESSING GEL-CAPZ.------STEP 2. TAKE EIGHT PILLZ, OR A BOTTLE IN ONE SITTING, ON A FULL STOMACH.—STEP 3. WAIT AN HOUR- TWO HOURS FOR A BUZZ, U WON’T REGRET IT!
>
> HOWEVER, LIKE MOST GOOD THINGZ, THERE R THREE DILEMAS, ONE BEING- IF U TAKE TWO MUCH ( 3 PACKS )/OR MIX IT WITH OTHER MAJOR MEDICATIONS (prozak), IT COULD POSSIBLY KILL U. TWO BEING-MASSIVE DEXTROMETH USE HAZ BEEN KNOWN TO MAKE SOME PEOPLE DANGEROUSLY PSYCOTIC, SO SPACE OUT USAGES, ONLY DO IT EVERY FEW WEEKZ. IF U FOLLOWED WARNING TWO, THEN DON’T WORRY ABOUT THREE- IT IZ ADDICTIVE, SO DON’T OVERINDULGE! h\<=P\>!!!ZIPPOBOY TAKES NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR OVERDOSES OR ADDICTION, AS I HAVE WARNED YOU!!!
on [ZiPpoBoY’S](http://www.angelfire.com/pa/zipblow/)page. I realized that for all the good, intelligent web pages out there, perhapse the biggest impact of the web is to give everyone their own little nutso-freako soapbox. So, I would like to invite my fellow dopers to post your favorite weird, unusual, over-the-top, lunatic, manic, bizarre or otherwise strange dedications, manifestos, statements, kinks, delusions, or other drivel which you have run across in the corse of your web wanderings. Remember, people are not only stranger than we know, they are even stranger than we want to know.
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### Author:  [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)
#### Post date: [April 15, 2000, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/2 "2000-04-15T06:24:00Z")
Jesus Dave, I thought someone was working on my family tree again.
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Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man
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### Author:  [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/3 "2000-04-16T01:11:00Z")
I know of a page that would fit perfectly in this thread, but he’d take it as encouragement.
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### Author:  [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/4 "2000-04-16T01:18:00Z")
My personal [favorite](http://www.tencommandments.org/).
An absolute nut.
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### Author:  [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/5 "2000-04-16T01:42:00Z")
Would it be inappropriate to post my own?
[http://home.earthlink.net/~ahunter](http://home.earthlink.net/~ahunter)
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Disable Similes in this Post
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### Author:  [@lovelee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lovelee)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/6 "2000-04-16T01:51:00Z")
If it wasn’t for the WWW, they’d be on street corners handing out Chick tracts. Be glad they’ve got an alternative soapbox! =)
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### Author:  [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/7 "2000-04-16T05:48:00Z")
I dunno, the tract behind this philosophy might be interesting.
> [@](#):
>
> It is the most Divine of all Metaphors
> The universe was created with a Big Bang!
>
> Through the Masturbation of God
Might help to be drunk, though.
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Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it.
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### Author:  [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/8 "2000-04-16T05:50:00Z")
Oh, sorry. [LINK](http://www.summum.org/summum.htm) to the matsurbation of God page.
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Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it.
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### Author:  [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/9 "2000-04-16T05:56:00Z")
Actually, I may have to reconsider. These folks use a _SACRAMENTAL TEQUILA!_. I’ll have to look into this more closely… 😃
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Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it.
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### Author:  [@broomhelga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/broomhelga)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/10 "2000-04-16T18:34:00Z")
I haven’t actually been to any of those links listed above, so if this has already been mentioned, I apoligize. Remember when you were a little kid and supposedly Coke & Tylenol gave you a buzz? Never tried it myself, however I was in a band that wrote a song about it. And remember that Dr. Pepper and Pop Rocks make your head explode. Or is that Coke, too? I heard weird things about bananas and baking soda, too.
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### Author:  [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/11 "2000-04-16T20:38:00Z")
For pure insanity, no one can top [Francis E. Dec, Esq.](http://www.teleport.com/~dkossy/dec.html), king of the rambling leaflet and “our only hope for a future!” Dec was the first to warn us all of the “Frankenstein Earphone Radio,” “Frankenstein Eyesight TV” and “Computer God Parroting Puppet Gangster Slaves.”
You can’t really get a feel for how messed up Dec was without seeing what his flyers [really looked like](http://www.teleport.com/~dkossy/dec.GIF). The densely-written ramblings of a true schizo.
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### Author:  [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/12 "2000-04-16T20:41:00Z")
It just makes me sad that Dr. Harvey Kellogg is not alive to make use of the Net. I have one of his tracts on the powers of ‘cleansing the colon’, and it was hilarious. “We brought out of one woman a ropey substance that was so tough we could not cut it with a knife!”
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### Author:  [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/13 "2000-04-16T20:47:00Z")
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- That probably _was_ her colon. She likely didn’t need that procedure done twice. - MC
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### Author:  [@DougC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougC)
#### Post date: [April 16, 2000, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/they-re-all-insane/16023/14 "2000-04-16T21:02:00Z")
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- My favorite is the last words of Dutch Shultz - I had to go looking for it. Dutch is not your garden-variety rambling idiot; he was a gangster during prohibition who was shot by a rival and then taken into police custody at the hospital. His injury was fatal and as he deteriorated he told the police lots of, well, lots of _something_.
\_ [http://www.bway.net/~abbot/dutch1.html](http://www.bway.net/~abbot/dutch1.html)
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- MC