# They're called 'f\*ck me' shoes for a reason! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 27, 2009, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463 "2009-07-27T18:54:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/21 "2009-07-27T19:45:07Z")
That must be one hell of a good game. They should use your thread as an ad. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![MoodIndigo1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@MoodIndigo1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoodIndigo1)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/22 "2009-07-27T19:46:36Z")
You should have just jumped on his bones with your mini and your fuck-me shoes. Sometimes men are oblivious. Or take out the handcuffsā€” heā€™ll understand you mean sex. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/23 "2009-07-27T19:49:56Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Hell, he doesnt have time to mow the lawn either šŸ™‚ Nope. Hires a lawn service. (and you thought you were kiddingā€¦) ---
**Author:** ![MoodIndigo1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@MoodIndigo1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoodIndigo1)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/24 "2009-07-27T19:51:50Z")
I wasnā€™t quite kidding, personally. After 15 years, some couples just take the other for granted, or one person in the couple does . You have to shake him up a bit, surprise him, though I donā€™t recommend doing that by taking a lover. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/25 "2009-07-27T19:54:07Z")
> [@MoodIndigo1](#): > > You should have just jumped on his bones with your mini and your fuck-me shoes. Sometimes men are oblivious.. Trueā€¦ I didnā€™t jump on him. But he knew. I _did_ sit next to him in the restaurant instead of across the table so I could stroke him under the tablecloth until he told me to quit. And I did tell him I was horny a half a dozen times. Thatā€™s how I got the offer of a quickie in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/26 "2009-07-27T19:54:50Z")
Mom-of-Andrewā€¦ how do I put this? You donā€™t exactly come off very well, even for the Pit. Youā€™ve admitted to cheating on your husband, do not even mention any guilt, and imply that you read _him_ the riot act and promised to leave him if you ever get bored again. yeah, maybe heā€™s not meeting your emotional needs or something, but may I delicately suggest youā€™re either making yourself sound like a [Deleted], or perhaps need to explain just a teensy bit to not make yourself sound like a [Deleted]? Without implying, of course, that there are any [Deleted] on the SD. The Dinner Dance, of course, is stupid, but itā€™s something which is quite oridnarily stupid, and not really reason to psych out. Second, women should probably know by now that men really do not understand your ā€œsignalsā€, which in any case we know are simply a complex way of you being able to say at any point you wanted or didnā€™t want something. If you want something, just say it. Finally, get yourself a WoW account. Itā€™s the sexiest action imaginable. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/27 "2009-07-27T20:02:25Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > Theyā€™re called ā€˜f\*ck meā€™ shoes for a reason, you idiot! I put on three inch heels, along with a mini-skirt and fire engine red lip dye, and dragged your butt out of the house to a restaurant. I even paid for the meal out of my ā€˜mad moneyā€™ so it wouldnā€™t hit our precious budget. All because you whined for an hour that you were hungry and nothing in the pantry or that I suggesting making for you sounded good. > > So why the h\*ll are you on your laptop across the living room from me?!? Youā€™re not even working ā€“ youā€™re playing an online game!!! > > I realize weā€™ve been married fifteen years and I may not have the most exciting body in the world. But Iā€™ve lost fifteen pounds in the last six months and I know I have killer legs, especially in uncomfortable three inch ā€˜f\*ck meā€™ black leather heels! The six year old is spending the entire night and half of tomorrow with the grandparents. And I am fully prepared to ignore the dizziness Iā€™m dealing with (neurological syndrome ā€“ donā€™t ask) and get pretty damn freaky with you tonight. > > So telling me I look ā€œNice, dearā€ and offering me a quickie is really not going to cut it. (ā€œIf youā€™ll do all the workā€ translation: Iā€™m going to lie perfectly still flat on my back and maybe kiss you a couple of times so youā€™ll leave me alone) I have things with batteries that would provide a h\*ll of a lot more stimulation. > > Tonight, I wanted you. My loss, apparantly. > > And thanks in advance for any offers this might generate, but seriously, no thanks. I need to pit this man, not hook up with another. > > [note: This was written Saturday night. Techinical issues prevented me from posting until today] My wife and I went out to dinner Saturday nightā€¦I have a son named Andrew that was at an overnight sitterā€™sā€¦when we got home from the restaurant, I played videogames instead of paying attention to herā€¦ Wow. Interesting. Iā€™ll have to make it up to her (you?). ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/28 "2009-07-27T20:04:00Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > Second, women should probably know by now that men really do not understand your ā€œsignalsā€, which in any case we know are simply a complex way of you being able to say at any point you wanted or didnā€™t want something. If you want something, just say it. Stroking him under the tablecloth and saying youā€™re horny a bunch of times is not exactly a subtle signal. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/29 "2009-07-27T20:04:39Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > Funny how if a man did the same thing heā€™d be considered a douchebag and it would be assumed that if sheā€™s not fucking him anymore it mustā€™ve been something that HE did. **MeanOldLady** is a poster known for her cutting wit and oozing sarcasm. And IIRC I donā€™t think sheā€™s old at all. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/30 "2009-07-27T20:16:52Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > ā€¦perhaps need to explain just a teensy bit to not make yourself sound like a [Deleted]? > > \ If you want something, just say it. \ > > Finally, get yourself a WoW account. Itā€™s the sexiest action imaginable. Okay, the boyfriend thing. Eight years ago, he was stressed out from grad school. I was stressed out from having a one hour commute (each way) and an uncomfortable job, but it paid well and I was the sole breadwinner so I needed to keep the job. He didnā€™t touch me for six months. I tried the black lace, the jumping him while he was asleep, you name it. I asked him to go to counseling with me for months. Nada. I didnā€™t want to leave him (especially when I was his sole means of support) so I went to a family friend for comfort. It led to more than we had intended. Possibly the dumbest decision of my life. ONLY good thing ā€“ **Pop-of-Andrew** finally went to counseling with me. We settled things betweeen us and decided to have an Andrew. _Just ask_ ā€“ Iā€™m assuming this is a cross post and you didnā€™t see my ā€œIā€™m hornyā€ statement. _Get yourself a WoW account_ ā€“ I was really hoping to let this misconception stand. Being ignored for WoW was a little better on my ego than the truth. He was on Pogo. Playing solitare.:smack: (Oh the irony!) ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/31 "2009-07-27T20:18:36Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > My wife and I went out to dinner Saturday nightā€¦I have a son named Andrew that was at an overnight sitterā€™sā€¦when we got home from the restaurant, I played videogames instead of paying attention to herā€¦ > > Wow. Interesting. Iā€™ll have to make it up to her (you?). Yeah, good luck - howā€™s the back feeling? ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/32 "2009-07-27T20:22:33Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > **MeanOldLady** is a poster known for her cutting wit and oozing sarcasm. And IIRC I donā€™t think sheā€™s old at all. I suspect her moniker is a pun on ā€œamino acidā€. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/33 "2009-07-27T20:25:51Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > My wife and I went out to dinner Saturday nightā€¦I have a son named Andrew that was at an overnight sitterā€™sā€¦when we got home from the restaurant, I played videogames instead of paying attention to herā€¦ > > Wow. Interesting. Iā€™ll have to make it up to her (you?). **FoieGrasIsEvil** Not me. But if you ignored that wonderful lady wearing three inch heels and a miniskirt for you ā€“ AND stroking you under the tablecloth ā€“ you sure as hell have to make it up to her. As a woman scorned, may I suggest chocolate, a single rose, and ripping her clothes to shreds as soon as your Andrew is safely unconscious? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/34 "2009-07-27T20:37:43Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > **MeanOldLady** is a poster known for her cutting wit and oozing sarcasm. And IIRC I donā€™t think sheā€™s old at all. Iā€™m not sure where youā€™re getting your information from. > [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > I tried the black lace, the jumping him while he was asleep, you name it. Ever try jumping on him while heā€™s awake? > [@AskNott](#): > > I suspect her moniker is a pun on ā€œamino acidā€. Heh, no, but sometimes I think that when I see my name. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/35 "2009-07-27T20:38:19Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > _Just ask_ ā€“ Iā€™m assuming this is a cross post and you didnā€™t see my ā€œIā€™m hornyā€ statement. > > _Get yourself a WoW account_ ā€“ I was really hoping to let this misconception stand. Being ignored for WoW was a little better on my ego than the truth. He was on Pogo. Playing solitare.:smack: (Oh the irony!) Ah. That makes things clearer for me. I though your ā€œIā€™m hornyā€ was implied, not spoken. Actually, in that caseā€¦ you may need to see a marriage counselor or something. I hate to be Mr. Boring Advice, but sounds like you have some problems which go beyond venting on a message board. Go alone if you have to, but go; you may be able to get him to come later. This actually sounds serious. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/36 "2009-07-27T20:41:55Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > Okay, the boyfriend thing. Eight years ago, he was stressed out from grad school. I was stressed out from having a one hour commute (each way) and an uncomfortable job, but it paid well and I was the sole breadwinner so I needed to keep the job. He didnā€™t touch me for six months. I tried the black lace, the jumping him while he was asleep, you name it. Round these part, should a man jump his _wife_ while sheā€™s asleep, thereā€™s plenty thatā€™s willing to call it rape. I mean, Iā€™m not throwing any stones or anything, Iā€™m just sayingā€¦ :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/37 "2009-07-27T20:47:30Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Ever try jumping on him while heā€™s awake? Yeah ā€“ back then he said no. So I would try to get his body interested while his mind was otherwise occupied. His body would start to respond, heā€™d wake up, and _then_ heā€™d say no. Not terribly nice or ethical, I realize, but desparate times and all that. The counseling did help a lot. Heā€™ll usually at least offer a quickie. And we do have mind blowing sessions sometimes. Itā€™s just been a while since my toes were curled. And I _felt_ hot, but got turned down anyway. So I needed to vent. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/38 "2009-07-27T20:53:16Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Round these part, should a man jump his _wife_ while sheā€™s asleep, thereā€™s plenty thatā€™s willing to call it rape. I agree, it was wrong. Very, very wrong. A double standard helps no one. I did stop when he woke up enough to say no. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/39 "2009-07-27T20:54:10Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > Yeah ā€“ back then he said no. So I would try to get his body interested while his mind was otherwise occupied. His body would start to respond, heā€™d wake up, and _then_ heā€™d say no. > > Not terribly nice or ethical, I realize, but desparate times and all that. > > The counseling did help a lot. Heā€™ll usually at least offer a quickie. And we do have mind blowing sessions sometimes. Itā€™s just been a while since my toes were curled. And I _felt_ hot, but got turned down anyway. So I needed to vent. Note: Men can get erections when theyā€™re asleep for reasons that have nothing to do with sexual desire. Men have minds, not just autonomous genital reflexes. And if you usually get offered a quickie, and mind-blowing sessions sometimes, you do not know how. **FUCKING**. lucky. you are. :mad::rolleyes::smack: ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2009, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/40 "2009-07-27T21:01:53Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > Not terribly nice or ethical, I realize, but **desparate times** and all that. (bolding mine) Hmm, we MIGHT be onto something here. Is this a real pattern that has been going on for some time? You always beg, and he always turns you down? Ever notice that in the world of collectables, the rarest items have the most value? By making yourself so available, maybe youā€™re lowering your value. He knows he can have you any time he wants, so why should he be bothered to have you right now? Consider making yourself rare. Get dressed up and go out with the girls. Have your own fun without him. Stop offering yourself so freely. Just a thought. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463.md?page=3)