# They're called 'f\*ck me' shoes for a reason! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 27, 2009, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463 "2009-07-27T18:54:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2009, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/161 "2009-07-28T22:58:25Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > Well shit it’s pretty obvious. She wasn’t complaining about the timing. She was giving an example of how she is willing to participate when hubby has “needs” which is in contrast to him totally shutting down when she has them. > > Timing really wasn’t the point, but I can understand why you would request a road map if that’s what you came away with after reading her post. > > I don’t mean to answer for **Rick** but I thought I could. While I’m not a genuine Mr. Snark, I have played him on TV. Exactly right. I read the first paragraph as given her druthers, she would not have picked 4:30 AM\* for the best time to make the beast with 2 backs. In the second paragraph she told hubby to make it a quickie (I’m guessing she wanted to go back to sleep, can’t say I blame her for that), but when he wanted to extend beyond a quickie she was good with that. When it was all done, she was good with what went down. Compare that to he sat and played cards on the computer when she made it very clear she was in a romantic mood. Hubby is a dick. \*In the military such a time is given as Oh four thirty. The oh stands for Oh my god it’s early 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2009, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/162 "2009-07-28T23:03:26Z")
> [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](#): > > How about when you’re having a rare spontaneous moment on top of the covers, with all the lights blazing, and your six year old walks in while your husband is going down on you? :o > > (Her response - “I see that you guys are . . . all naked. It’s OK, I won’t tell anyone.”) > > Seriously, kids complicate your sex life. I think a lot of couples shift into no sex mode during the hormone swings and lack of sleep of the first couple years. It’s difficult to return to “horny teenager mode” after that. > > **Mom-of-Andrew** , I want to say I really admire you taking your son’s well-being into account. Plenty of people in this thread seem to disagree, but I think that spending some time in a less-than-ideal sexual pairing so you can maintain all the good things about the marriage, including a stable home and dad in the kids’ life, can be a very fair trade off. Not fun, but maybe worth it. > > But best would be to pursue the issue in your own head and with your husband - maybe make that therapy single and couples, and excavate your sex life. It can happen, and you’d have the best of both worlds. Our stepdaughter walked in on us while the wife was fellating me when she was 12. She was just like “Oh my GOD, Mom, I’m never kissing you ever again!” ---
**Author:** ![ivn1188](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e480ec/32.png) [@ivn1188](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivn1188)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2009, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/163 "2009-07-28T23:04:28Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > How about with the kids fully awake and in the next room and you have the bedroom door open? > > Never underestimate the power of video games. Also, never underestimate the power of the internet. Say hi to /b/. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2009, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/164 "2009-07-28T23:20:23Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Wait a minute. > > You are complaining on one hand about not getting enough. Then the next minute, the timing aint so hot. Actually, yeah. If less than once a month is enough for you, more power to ya. Ten to twelve times a year isn’t quite enough for me. And IF I SAID YES, I get to complain about the timing of those 10-12 times. If there were 10-12 times of mind blowing sex and thirty or so times of just getting busy, then you’d have a valid point. ---
**Author:** ![Bob\_Baks\_Noogiehead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@Bob\_Baks\_Noogiehead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob_Baks_Noogiehead)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2009, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/165 "2009-07-28T23:46:02Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > [Instant boner](http://www.cars.com/go/search/detail.jsp;?tracktype=usedcc&searchType=22&pageNumber=0&numResultsPerPage=50&largeNumResultsPerPage=0&sortorder=ascending&sortfield=PRICE+ascending%2cPRICE+descending&certifiedOnly=false&criteria=K-%7cE-ALL%7cM-_29_%7cH-%7cN-N%7cR-10000%7cI-1%2c7%7cP-PRICE+ascending%2cPRICE+descending%7cQ-ascending%7cX-popular%7cZ-80130&aff=national&paId=316469384&recnum=18&leadExists=true). On _really_ tough days you can use the engine. I came twice. Female, pushing forty ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/166 "2009-07-29T00:05:24Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Poor you. Poor, poor you. Mrs M has had a variety of mysterious ailments which has kept her from going anywhere near my dick [sup]\*[/sup] for two calendar months, and I’ve lost a fuck of a lot more than fifteen whole pounds (meanwhile she hasn’t, and needs to even more desperately than I did, which is saying a big ol’ mouthful, believe me, but that’s another story). And you got turned down once. Poor you. > > [sup]\*[/sup]Apparently. I’d have thought at least her hand was in working order and her mouth might be up to the odd as-if-she-meant-it kiss, God forbid I should suggest a BJ, but nooo… If you’re as bitter in person as you are here, it’s no wonder she doesn’t want your dick near her mouth. Is there any relationship thread you don’t whine in? ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/167 "2009-07-29T00:53:15Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Our stepdaughter walked in on us while the wife was fellating me when she was 12. Wow, you must have married young. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/168 "2009-07-29T00:58:29Z")
Gotta get 'em early now-a-days or they become all bitter and squishy. Sometimes they’ll even come with a group of small insects. All of these things and more are obviously why you just gotta be ahead of the curve here and go with young’ins. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/169 "2009-07-29T01:58:34Z")
> [@friedo](#): > > Wow, you must have married young. Yeah, I did, because every man knows that sincere blowjobs end at marriage and forty years of age. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/170 "2009-07-29T02:51:01Z")
> [@Hero\_From\_Sector\_7G](#): > > Would a woman go from cold to fuck beast just because her husband put on nice clothes, slapped her laptop lid shut, and said “IT IS FUCK TIME!!!” I only now realized there’s a certain demographic that’d be all over this – people with a hard-on for [Dennis Hopper in Blue Velvet](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sc7fpFTvTog/SgipOAstkRI/AAAAAAAAA84/o_bwm93tk7s/s400/frank_booth.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![runcible\_spoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@runcible\_spoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runcible_spoon)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/171 "2009-07-29T03:28:53Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Yeah, I did, because every man knows that sincere blowjobs end at marriage and forty years of age. Methinks you’ve been wooshed. ---
**Author:** ![SleepyDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@SleepyDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SleepyDuck)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/172 "2009-07-29T03:36:07Z")
At this point I have no advice (or flames) to contribute. I just wanted to pop in to say that this made me smile: > [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > sometimes I need the cuddling enough to put up with pain in the neck. You know, in that unintended-double-meaning-serving-as-a-microcosm kind of way. Oh. And the thread’s title seduced me in to opening it. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/173 "2009-07-29T03:48:52Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Yeah, I did, because every man knows that sincere blowjobs end at marriage and forty years of age. Ha! Does it have to be sincere? And must the woman be pure of heart? I guess she should. I didn’t read this thread, but I wanted to comment on something I noticed when I skimmed: It does not seem totally horrible to me to say, “ok, but you are doing all the work”. I mean, sometimes, I can see how that could be said. If my normal M.O. is to go all buckwild, sucking to completion, complete with deep throat, riding it like a cowboy till my thighs burn, bending up like a pretzel…_if_ that is my regular M.O., I can see how I can be justified in saying, once in a while, “Hey, if you really want some action when I am this exhausted, you are gonna have to handle the biz.” ETA: friedo cracked me up. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/174 "2009-07-29T03:52:17Z")
> [@Mom-of-Andrew](#): > > About a month ago. At 4:15am. My alarm goes off at 6am. I am not a morning person. Given everything else we’ve learned in this thread, waking her up at 4:15 like this strikes me as a really hostile act. ---
**Author:** ![Mom-of-Andrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8c91f0/32.png) [@Mom-of-Andrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mom-of-Andrew)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/175 "2009-07-29T04:27:08Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Given everything else we’ve learned in this thread, waking her up at 4:15 like this strikes me as a really hostile act. I know I’m not the most objective person (I really do love him) but it isn’t hostile. It’s just thoughtless. He really is that arrogant. Besides – I’m gettin’ me some, YKWIM? :D;)😃 The timing could be better, certainly, but still… ---
**Author:** ![Scruff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Scruff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scruff)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/176 "2009-07-29T06:54:09Z")
> [@runcible\_spoon](#): > > Methinks you’ve been wooshed. After almost 30 years of marriage, I’ve not been wooshed in a long, loooong time. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/177 "2009-07-29T06:56:46Z")
> [@ivn1188](#): > > The OP actually made me laugh. I have little sympathy, for several reasons: > > First, three inch heels are by no means “fuck me” pumps. I’ve seen sunday school teachers and grandmas in three inch heels. Pshaw, you don’t think grandmas and Sunday school teachers have swinging sex lives? Now who’s being naive! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/178 "2009-07-29T07:14:11Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Given everything else we’ve learned in this thread, waking her up at 4:15 like this strikes me as a really hostile act. Heh. Tell that to my girlfriend. She gets horny at the worst possible time: _really_ fucking early in the morning. I am also not a morning person at all but sometimes I get woken up at the crack of dawn to find her humping my leg and grabbing my cock. Any other time conceivable I would be fine with this, but at that hour even sex does not hold as powerful of a draw as sleep does, and I will usually push her off. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/179 "2009-07-29T07:54:28Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Yeah, I did, because every man knows that sincere blowjobs end at marriage and forty years of age. 17 years and counting of experience that says every man is wrong. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2009, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463/180 "2009-07-29T07:59:09Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > Heck, sex with the baby sleeping in the next room was easy. It’s the teenagers who are up doing homework that go :dubious: when Mom and Dad say, “9pm, bedtime everyone!” We’ve taken to morning romps because well, teenagers can do nothing as well as sleeping in. I’m glad someone said that! We got really interested in their social lives. “So, you’re going to your friend’s tonight?” The car leaves, five minutes to make sure no one is returning to get something forgotten, and zoom. Being an empty nester now has some real advantages. Something interesting being scheduled a turnoff? Not hardly. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-f-ck-me-shoes-for-a-reason/504463.md?page=10)