# They're called nipples, Jackass! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 9, 2001, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414 "2001-10-09T21:27:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Misery\_s\_Company](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@Misery\_s\_Company](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misery_s_Company)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2001, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/41 "2001-10-10T22:59:43Z")
First, yes my name is from the Metallica song. My beloved is mlc, here on the boards, for misery loves company. Second, I don’t mind the occasional glances of men. I find it flattering. I just mind when yucky, always on my nerves, open mouth chewer coworkers discuss the fine points of accounting with my tits, nipples hard or not. I was not making a “guys are bad” statement, I was merely letting off some “I really need a day away from this cockwad” steam. So, for those of you that appreciate a nice set of tits, by all means, enjoy a glance. mlc would also be flattered. Just don’t ogle with half chewed carrots stuck in your teeth day after fucking day. As for replying to his genitalia, the thought of his penis makes me want to hurl. But not a bad thought for future reference. ---
**Author:** ![ThunderBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@ThunderBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThunderBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2001, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/42 "2001-10-10T23:08:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kricket \* > \*\*Great, now I have this mental picture of ThunderBunny with big hair, a hairy chest, gold chains and his shirt unbuttoned doing the finger shoot point thing and winking at poor unsuspecting women!!! > > My eyes! My eyes! \*\* :: Does the finger-shoot-point thing, winks at Kricket… I am _so_ down with that. You stay right there – lemmie go get my purple polyester flare pants and my humungous purple shades. :o ---
**Author:** ![ThunderBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@ThunderBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThunderBunny)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2001, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/43 "2001-10-10T23:17:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Misery’s Company \* > \*\*So, for those of you that appreciate a nice set of tits, by all means, enjoy a glance. mlc would also be flattered. Just don’t ogle with half chewed carrots stuck in your teeth day after fucking day. > \*\* Ya know, I feel a bit bad – this whole thread was like a setup. I agree with you totally. I can just imagine you you in a conference room with a bunch of guys, making an important point, only to realize that they’re all drooling and looking at your breasts (well maybe it’s the way you spin those tassels on the ends… :o sorry, couldn’t resist). Doesn’t matter what you say – it’s lost in the haze of testosterone. On the other side of the coin, there are certainly people on the other end of the spectrum who… make it difficult to concentrate through actions (and outfits) of their own. They’re deserving of their own rant as well. Now if you’ll excuse me that image of tassels spinning has distracted me too much, and I’ve lost my train of thought… ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2001, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/44 "2001-10-10T23:51:48Z")
This month’s Maxim magazine states that a 6 degree drop in temperature at the office is generally enough to…er…bring the gals to attention, as it were. Anyone work in an office with a thermostat who cares to try and prove the thoery? ---
**Author:** ![heresiarch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/45 "2001-10-11T00:47:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by drachillix \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by andros \* > > \*\* > > > > > [@](#): > > > > > > when one of us dumb males would see a case of nipplage, we would whisper, “THO!” > > > > We used “NE” (nipple erection). :shrug: We were young, dumb, and bubbling with hormones. What can I say? \*\* > > Ours was “Got Milk?” \*\* Don’t forget, “Turkey’s done!” ---
**Author:** ![Kricket](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f14d63/32.png) [@Kricket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kricket)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/46 "2001-10-11T02:16:33Z")
Hey baby what’s your sign? I’m with Misery! I don’t mind someone taking a quick peek, but when they are obviously mesmerised by a pair of nipples it gets ridiculous. ---
**Author:** ![Earthling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/90db22/32.png) [@Earthling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthling)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/47 "2001-10-11T02:42:32Z")
I have to confess - I’m a complete dork. When I saw the thread title, my first thought was [pipe fittings](http://www.swagelok.com/PRODUCTDETAILS.asp?PartNumber=B-12-HN&Price=&Picture=&CTSCKey=135). Brass nipples. Yeah, that explains my social life. **Weirddave** - six degree drop from _what_? I’d think nipple erections are affected more by absolute temperature than changes thereof. ---
**Author:** ![Qwertyasdfg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ecc23a/32.png) [@Qwertyasdfg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qwertyasdfg)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/48 "2001-10-11T02:51:44Z")
Speaking as a guy, I don’t understand “staring is sexual harassment.” I try not to stare, but I admit that on occasion I’ve checked out a female, and such. What I don’t understand is how my using my eye muscles to move my pupils in a certain spot is suddenly a crime with serious repercussions. Sure, you shouldn’t have to deal with this on a regular basis in a perfect, and the guy is pretty low browed, but just don’t give him something to stare at and everything will be fine. ---
**Author:** ![Qwertyasdfg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ecc23a/32.png) [@Qwertyasdfg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qwertyasdfg)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/49 "2001-10-11T02:54:30Z")
that should read “in a perfect world,” my post above. ---
**Author:** ![Misery\_s\_Company](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@Misery\_s\_Company](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misery_s_Company)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/50 "2001-10-11T03:15:23Z")
Kricket - Thanks! As for the - change how you dress - argument… I am generally a jeans and t-shirt kinda girl. I don’t walk around waiting for guys to notice my tits, and then complain about it. As I said before, I don’t really mind people noticing. 🙂 And I don’t think that this coworker of mine is guilty of sexual harrasment just because he stares at my tits. He has never made a comment about them. It’s just that having had noticeable breasts since 5th grade, I miss eye contact. If the eyes are the window to the soul, Cockwad coworker has never given me the chance to see his soul, because his eyes never make contact with mine. I think his major problem is that he has no internal sensor that tells him that it is not appropriate to _constantly_ direct his attention to my tits. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/51 "2001-10-11T03:28:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kricket \* > **So not only are my breast standing at attention most of the time they are also covered in bologna or cotto.** Somehow that sounds like the PERFECT combination! ---
**Author:** ![whistlepig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/73ab20/32.png) [@whistlepig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whistlepig)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/52 "2001-10-11T03:37:17Z")
I agree with the posters who say to call the guy on it. Just say, “My face is up here, buddy.” Maybe you could embarass him into proper behavior. Ever get a chance to meet his wife? You could ask her, “Does he stare at your chest when he talks to you? He always stares at my chest when he talks to me.” That might help. To the guys: We had two signals - “Headlights are on high beam” “Is it just me, or is it the air conditioning?” I feel like such a pig. ---
**Author:** ![JonScribe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3be4f8/32.png) [@JonScribe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JonScribe)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/53 "2001-10-11T06:26:08Z")
I think the Seinfeld Doctorine applies here. (Paraphrasing) Looking at nipples is like looking at the sun. You get a sense, then you look away. ---
**Author:** ![Stiletto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a4c791/32.png) [@Stiletto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stiletto)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/54 "2001-10-11T06:28:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Misery’s Company \* > \*\*Kricket - Thanks! > > As for the - change how you dress - argument… I am generally a jeans and t-shirt kinda girl. I don’t walk around waiting for guys to notice my tits, and then complain about it. As I said before, I don’t really mind people noticing. 🙂 > \*\* Well, I can hardly blame the guy for _looking_, as they are very nice breasts, IIRC. 😃 But I think I agree with the suggestion that the next time you catch him doing it, just come out and ask him to stop. That level of embarassment should be sufficient deterrent. If it isn’t, then maybe you _should_ mention a sexual harrasment claim. Technically, it does qualify, even if it is way out on the edge of realistic in a lot of places. Just my $0.02. -Stil ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/55 "2001-10-11T09:06:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by whistlepig \* > **Ever get a chance to meet his wife? You could ask her, “Does he stare at your chest when he talks to you? He always stares at my chest when he talks to me.” That might help.** Of course, this only works if the wife isn’t staring as well. (It is my sacred duty to put weird, obscene, and otherwise unusual images into the heads of random people. :D) > [@](#): > > \*\*I feel like such a pig. \*\* That wouldn’t have anything to do with your nickname, would it, **whistlepig**? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kricket](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f14d63/32.png) [@Kricket](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kricket)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/56 "2001-10-11T13:15:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Derleth \* > > Of course, this only works if the wife isn’t staring as well. > > (It is my sacred duty to put weird, obscene, and otherwise unusual images into the heads of random people. :D) Yes, but in my case that could be true! How is that for scary? ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2001, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414/57 "2001-10-11T17:45:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SHAKES \* > \*\*I think what _really_ bothers you is that someone who you find disgusting is staring at you nips. Especialy an opened mouth food chewer… ewe I fucking hate that too… > > If I were you, I would goto the boss and tell him/her that he made an inappropiate pass at you. and that you don’t feel comfortable working around him. > > With today’s pc world that would solve your problem real quick. > > Yeah, I know I’m an evil bastard. \ \*\* Ya know, I tried to ignore this post. But I just can’t do it. Why not go one further? Why not invite the “open mouth chewer” to her appartment one night. Then she could seduce him, have sex with him, (I know it sounds gross, but stick with me here,) and then, after he leaves, call the cops and accuse him of raping her. I bet that would solve her problem. Show him for looking in her general direction! In my mind, women who use accusations of sexual harrasment in order to hurt someone are no better than those who would cry rape. So the guy aimed his eyes at her breasts. He should lose his fucking job for it? **SHAKES** , you aren’t evil. You are stupid. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/theyre-called-nipples-jackass/86414.md?page=2)