# Things are getting better. That's what I told my daughter. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 5, 2006, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990 "2006-12-05T21:40:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/1 "2006-12-05T21:40:51Z")
My daughter is in college and has gotten herself a job at The Unlimited. She is very good at what she does. She’s a pleasant, intelligent and lovely individual. She nothing like me. I get a phone call just now from her. “The customer complained to my manager about me,” she tells me angrily, “My manager told me she knows that I’m not like that but. . .” my daughter begins to cry. “She kept calling me ‘YOU people’. ‘YOU people are all the same.’ ‘YOU people never know what the hell you’re doing.’ ‘I don’t know why they let YOU people even work a cash register.’ It wasn’t that she complained to the manager-- she was rude and I expect that sometimes but, but— why the hell did she keep calling me YOU people?” Race relations have improved greatly since I was her age. I remember having footballs thrown at my head and told to ‘Go back to Jamaica’ and being called ‘Aunt Jemima’. YOU people seems mild. Until I hear my daughter crying over the phone. So FUCK YOU, you racist bitch who made my daughter cry when all she did was try to help you. You better be lucky WE people raised our child to be polite and well-mannered because what you should have gotten was a punch in the nose. Bitch. That felt good. Lemme say it one more time. Fucking bitch! ---
**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/2 "2006-12-05T21:45:28Z")
If I had been the supervisor, I would have escorted the “customer” off of the premises and invited her to not ever come back. That kind of remarks are totally uncalled for in any circumstance. **Biggirl** , I’m sorry your daughter had to be exposed to such behavior, but unfortunately it probably won’t be the last time. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/3 "2006-12-05T21:45:55Z")
[QUOTE=Biggirl] My daughter is in college and has gotten herself a job at The Unlimited. She is very good at what she does. She’s a pleasant, intelligent and lovely individual. She nothing like me. I get a phone call just now from her. “The customer complained to my manager about me,” she tells me angrily, “My manager told me she knows that I’m not like that but. . .” my daughter begins to cry. “She kept calling me ‘YOU people’. ‘YOU people are all the same.’ ‘YOU people never know what the hell you’re doing.’ ‘I don’t know why they let YOU people even work a cash register.’ It wasn’t that she complained to the manager-- she was rude and I expect that sometimes but, but— why the hell did she keep calling me YOU people?” Race relations have improved greatly since I was her age. I remember having footballs thrown at my head and told to ‘Go back to Jamaica’ and being called ‘Aunt Jemima’. YOU people seems mild. Until I hear my daughter crying over the phone. So FUCK YOU, you racist bitch who made my daughter cry when all she did was try to help you. You better be lucky WE people raised our child to be polite and well-mannered because what you should have gotten was a punch in the nose. Bitch. That felt good. Lemme say it one more time. Fucking bitch! [/QUOTE] I can understand that if you’re a person of color you would think that it’s a racial slur, but from the information you gave us here, I can also see how the rant was directed at low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service. Not that I’m accusing your kid of being any of those things. I can just see how the bitch could be pitched one way and received another way entirely. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/4 "2006-12-05T21:47:39Z")
THOSE people need a smack upside the head with a baseball bat. Wanna borrow my Louisville Slugger? ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/5 "2006-12-05T21:50:26Z")
Wow. That customer dared to talk to her manager after saying stuff like that? I hope the manager stood up for her to the customer’s face. I wouldn’t let a customer like that back in my store, period. I’ve had people refuse to deal with me because I’m female, and it sucks. That kind of attitude is hard to deal with when you’re just trying to do your job, and especially when you’re unprepared for it. It’s even worse if your boss won’t stand up for you. It’s amazing how blatant some people can still be. You’d think at least people could keep those kinds of opinions to themselves but for some reason asses like that tend to be vocal about it. ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/6 "2006-12-05T21:53:12Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I can understand that if you’re a person of color you would think that it’s a racial slur, but from the information you gave us here, I can also see how the rant was directed at low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service. Not that I’m accusing your kid of being any of those things. I can just see how the bitch could be pitched one way and received another way entirely. [/QUOTE] I generally like to give people the benefit of doubt, too… so not attacking you or anything, but in this case it definitely sounds like it **was** racial. Some people are too evil to live :mad: ☹ ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/7 "2006-12-05T21:55:52Z")
[QUOTE=Noone Special] I generally like to give people the benefit of doubt, too… so not attacking you or anything, but in this case it definitely sounds like it **was** racial. [/QUOTE] In what way? I could see it both ways. ---
**Author:** ![Caridwen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c89c15/32.png) [@Caridwen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caridwen)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/8 "2006-12-05T22:01:55Z")
Come on. > [@](#): > > ‘I don’t know why they let YOU people even work a cash register.’ Both ways? What other way? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/9 "2006-12-05T22:02:36Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I can understand that if you’re a person of color you would think that it’s a racial slur, but from the information you gave us here, I can also see how the rant was directed at low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service. Not that I’m accusing your kid of being any of those things. I can just see how the bitch could be pitched one way and received another way entirely. [/QUOTE] Or she could have meant teenagers/college age kids. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/10 "2006-12-05T22:05:15Z")
I’m actually amazed that “YOU people” seems mild to you, Biggirl. It seems downright horrible to me. Well not so much amazed but frustrated that something so horrible sounding is so much less than other shit you’ve had to put up with. I keep hoping that if we hang tight long enough all of the “that’s just the way they were brought up” old people racists will die off and everything will be cool here in the US but sadly I keep getting the racist vibe from people much younger than me. It’s never gonna end :-/ ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/11 "2006-12-05T22:05:32Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] In what way? I could see it both ways. [/QUOTE] Honestly I’m not sure why, but **Biggirl** ’s description just gives me “that” kind of vibe, loud and clear. Hey, I could be wrong (and as I already said I won’t think any less of others disagreeing with me on this.) In fact I **wish** I could believe I’m wrong. But… I’ve seen similar situations. This sounds like a racial incident to me. Also, judging from my experience (mostly as a third prty, uninvolved onlooker,) one can generally tell when they or others are being addressed as a member of an “inferior” group, so I accept **Biggirl** ’s daughter’s testimony at face value, here, as well. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/12 "2006-12-05T22:05:58Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I can understand that if you’re a person of color you would think that it’s a racial slur, but from the information you gave us here, I can also see how the rant was directed at low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service. Not that I’m accusing your kid of being any of those things. I can just see how the bitch could be pitched one way and received another way entirely. [/QUOTE] Same here. I didn’t even detect a whiff of racial slurrage (and I’m pretty sensitive to it) until the OP mentioned she and her daughter were of Jamaican descent. Granted, the OP and I weren’t there, so if the daughter thinks she was being singled out for her color, that should carry some weight, but I don’t think it’s an automatic. Hell, **I’ve** railed at retail workers about “YOU PEOPLE,” and I assure you it was nothing to do with their ethnicity. It was YOU lazy, YOU untrained, YOU unhelpful, and sometimes YOU teenaged, but not YOU [color]. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/13 "2006-12-05T22:25:15Z")
[QUOTE=Kalhoun] I can understand that if you’re a person of color you would think that it’s a racial slur, but from the information you gave us here, I can also see how the rant was directed at low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service. Not that I’m accusing your kid of being any of those things. I can just see how the bitch could be pitched one way and received another way entirely. [/QUOTE] Well, we do have this information – > [@](#): > > She is very good at what she does. She’s a pleasant, intelligent and lovely individual. That eliminates her from the category of “low-level clerk people who are inadequately trained and don’t give a fuck about customer service,” doesn’t it? I was born and raised in the land of Jim Crow, and I have always understood “you people” to be a way of saying “niggers” without coming out and saying it. The thin veneer of \*politesse \*over a substrate of racism. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/14 "2006-12-05T22:27:36Z")
Maybe she was trying to take “You people” back? Yeah, that sucks, **Biggirl**. Bitch deserves a slap-down. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/15 "2006-12-05T22:38:36Z")
Yes, racism is unfortunately still around. And worse yet, it probably always will be. But the good news is that racism is on the defensive. Every day and every year its circle is being pushed a little smaller and fewer people are standing inside of it. Racism that was once unremarked is now being questioned and racism that was once questionable is now unacceptable. Things are getting better. ---
**Author:** ![Iggins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Iggins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggins)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/16 "2006-12-05T22:43:24Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] Hell, **I’ve** railed at retail workers about “YOU PEOPLE,” and I assure you it was nothing to do with their ethnicity. It was YOU lazy, YOU untrained, YOU unhelpful, and sometimes YOU teenaged, but not YOU [color]. [/QUOTE] I suppose I don’t see the value in railing at any employee, unless they are overtly rude. If they are not good workers, a polite, firm complaint to a supervisor is sufficient. To the OP - if it was a racial comment, I would commend your daughter for not slugging the customer. I would have, were I the recipient (I’m white, though). If it was just general assholishness, then she should just keep a good relationship with her boss, so that she does not get unduly slandered by customers. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/17 "2006-12-05T22:54:39Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] Hell, **I’ve** railed at retail workers about “YOU PEOPLE,” and I assure you it was nothing to do with their ethnicity. It was YOU lazy, YOU untrained, YOU unhelpful, and sometimes YOU teenaged, but not YOU [color]. [/QUOTE] If you are speaking to a group, it is assumed that “you people” refers to the group. If the group includes more than one race, it is fair to assume that inclusion in that particular group justifies “you people.” If you are speaking to an individual and say “you people”, you are asserting membership in a group that is undefined. It may not \*necessarily \*be racist, but I could make money betting that way. It is a code phrase, a way of saying something nasty by using not nasty words. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/18 "2006-12-05T23:00:55Z")
[QUOTE=Contrapuntal] If you are speaking to a group, it is assumed that “you people” refers to the group. If the group includes more than one race, it is fair to assume that inclusion in that particular group justifies “you people.” If you are speaking to an individual and say “you people”, you are asserting membership in a group that is undefined. It may not \*necessarily \*be racist, but I could make money betting that way. It is a code phrase, a way of saying something nasty by using not nasty words. [/QUOTE] I agree. It _could_ have gone the way of the racial slur, but it’s not apparent from the information we received. My husband and I were invited to HIS sister’s house for a get-together. He said, “We just SAW _those people_.” It’s kind of turned into the family joke. I don’t know why, but I still have a hard time comprehending the balls it would take to say something like that, even though I know damn well it happens every day. The mind boggles. ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/19 "2006-12-05T23:04:27Z")
Count me in with the folks who use “You People” to mean “You Tailgaters,” or “You People who Drive while Talking on Cellphones,” or “You People who Think it’s Okay to Cut in Line.” There is nothing racial about it, and I hope nobody thinks I’m racist when I say it. Odds are, I don’t even know what race you are and it has nothing to do with anything. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2006, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990/20 "2006-12-05T23:06:46Z")
[QUOTE=Antinor01] Or she could have meant teenagers/college age kids. [/QUOTE] Right. Or holiday help, or fat people or whatever happened to trip her anger. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-are-getting-better-thats-what-i-told-my-daughter/382990.md?page=2)