# Things I find rude and will make me look down on you **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 11, 2013, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849 "2013-01-11T12:15:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/141 "2013-01-14T04:35:29Z")
> [@Sevencl](#): > > I’m 6’1" and weighed 17 stone (238 lbs) _before_ I put on a lot of extra weight following surgery. I don’t know what I’m at now. If I’m fine in normal stalls, so are you. > > Also just because you’ve never come out to find an obviously disabled person waiting to go in after you doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. For a disabled person the event that some able bodied person feels like using the extra wide stall while they have to wait happens pretty regularly - we’ve heard from two people it happens to in this thread alone. One of whom has mentioned that no, sometimes he can’t manage to hold it. See, it’s not that hard to grasp. And I can hold it when I only have to pee but (as I’ve mentioned on the board before) ever since my SCI I have suffered from horrible, chronic diarrhea that occasionally resists my (usually) reliable prophylactic treatment of large doses of Imodium and I _can’t_ hold it when this happens. Thankfully this occurrence has become more and more rare the longer I have lived with the condition and developed ways of handling it but when it strikes there is nothing I can do but hope the fucking stall is available. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/142 "2013-01-14T04:40:56Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > I’m not saying it doesn’t happen. I’m saying the odds are so ridiculously in my favor that it wont happen, I’ll take my chances. But see, when _everybody_ adopts this way of thinking, those “chances” drop to zero. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/143 "2013-01-14T04:47:27Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Because I’m 6’, 215lbs. Using the regular one feels like a coffin. My feeling might be different if at 42 I could count the number of times on more than one hand that I’ve actually seen a handicap person using those stalls. > > The odds are pretty damn slim that a HC person is going to need it at the same time I do. And even then, the odds are even slimmer that his condition involves him not being able to hold it like everyone else does. > > I’ll take my chances. And the reason why people who actually need handicapped stalls don’t go out as often is because of people like you. As someone else said, YOU aren’t the one who will suffer the consequences if someone else needs that stall in a hurry. > [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](#): > > A big problem with public men’s rooms, in my opinion, is that the standard, non-handicap stalls frequently don’t provide any clean or secure place where you can put your wallet and similarly important personal items. Usually the only option is the floor, and if the stall partitions don’t go all the way down, it’s anything but secure. By contrast, the handicap stall is generally against the wall and you can put your stuff up against the wall there. So I’ll use the handicap stall once in awhile if I have to, but that’s rare. This is a problem in women’s rooms, too. I’ll go into a stall, and see the three holes where there USED to be a coat hook, for purses, coats, scarves, and whatever. Now they are gone. I don’t know why. I hate putting my purse and especially my wrap on the floor. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/144 "2013-01-14T04:53:49Z")
> [@Sevencl](#): > > But you aren’t taking **your** chances. You’re not the one who’ll suffer if some guy in a wheelchair was sat outside waiting for you to finish, he is. Especially if he can’t hold it. You’re taking **his** chances, for a completely inane, selfish reason. At 42, it hasn’t happened yet. Let’s just say it happens tomorrow. Statistically, I’ve got another 42 years before that happens again. And ironically, at that age, I’ll be eligible for the HC stall myself. And hey, who knows? Maybe I might be the one shitting my pants because some young punk was using the stall. If I go to my grave making only one man shit his pants; I’m at peace with that. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/145 "2013-01-14T05:26:16Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > At 42, it hasn’t happened yet. Let’s just say it happens tomorrow. Statistically, I’ve got another 42 years before that happens again. And ironically, at that age, I’ll be eligible for the HC stall myself. And hey, who knows? Maybe I might be the one shitting my pants because some young punk was using the stall. > > If I go to my grave making only one man shit his pants; I’m at peace with that. It’s taking longer than we thought. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/146 "2013-01-14T05:27:45Z")
Can’t believe this hasn’t been mentioned yet, but, smoking! I only say this cause I grew up with two parents who smoked around me incessantly all the time. That and I’ve never come across a considerate smoker in my lifetime. Not once. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/147 "2013-01-14T06:09:41Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > Can’t believe this hasn’t been mentioned yet, but, smoking! I only say this cause I grew up with two parents who smoked around me incessantly all the time. That and I’ve never come across a considerate smoker in my lifetime. Not once. I absolutely hate smoking but I’ve known a small number of considerate smokers, all of whom have since quit I think. Plus most that I’ve known have been in their teens or early 20s and that age group isn’t known for its consideration anyway. People who started smoking well after it was common knowledge how harmful it is though, yeah, I do think a bit less of them. Not that it can’t be outweighed by good qualities, but it’s a few negative points. I grew up with one very inconsiderate smoker parent. He quit as soon as he felt like it, well after I was an adult, and well after I asked him not to smoke around me and he declined. So while I was glad he quit, I was pretty pissed that it was apparently that easy for him (he quit on his first try with no stop smoking aid, and he was a HEAVY smoker for decades) and he just didn’t care enough to do it for my sister and me. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/148 "2013-01-14T06:57:57Z")
Great timing on the inconsiderate smoker complaints. Hey, Shakes, while you’re over here gloating about using the handicapped stalls, why ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/149 "2013-01-14T07:01:30Z")
… not share your littering confession, too? Seems like the perfect thread to for you to really shine in. ---
**Author:** ![Doggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/87869e/32.png) [@Doggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doggo)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/150 "2013-01-14T07:04:49Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > Parents who allow kids to stand in chairs. I don’t mind curious babies practicing standing, but walking kids whose shoes are just as filthy as any adults. Thanks for ruining my white jeans, khaki skirt, pale blue shorts, etc. If I plan to eat out I have to dress with the expectation that my clean clothes will be ruined by a filthy seat. > > Parents who insult kids. If you wouldn’t tell a fellow adult “You’re stupid” “Shut up” “Get out of my way” don’t say it to a kid. Use your manners. > > People who talk on cell phones during transactions. Unless it’s an emergency, pay attention to the live action human in front of you and those in line behind you. > > Uncovered sneezes and coughs are never, ever, ever acceptable. > Oh, and because my back was broken a few years ago, and it’s hard to get comfortable. Whenever possible I sit in lotus position to ease the strain on my back, so I don’t mind when people (including Balled People) spread out. Never know who may be dealing with pain, so as long as everyone has room, I don’t care if strangers in public work on downward dog in the elevator. Your reply reminded me that I really hate parents that allow their children to occupy seats on public transport when all seats are full. Especially when they could either sit on their parent’s lap or at the least share one seat. Preferably, they could do what we did when I was young and stand to allow adults to sit. ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/151 "2013-01-14T07:16:09Z")
> [@Sevencl](#): > > **Rude**? _How?_ Really? I need to see your armpit hair waving about? A grown man in either of these shirt situations just seems to be a bit…out of the loop I guess. Different strokes. ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/152 "2013-01-14T07:20:07Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > If I go to my grave making only one man shit his pants; I’m at peace with that. I’m not gonna claim that line as a sig, but I thought I’d make mention of it because someone eventually will. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/153 "2013-01-14T08:39:47Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > Can’t believe this hasn’t been mentioned yet, but, smoking! I only say this cause I grew up with two parents who smoked around me incessantly all the time. That and I’ve never come across a considerate smoker in my lifetime. Not once. I’d like to say something about this. Even back when it was okay to smoke in restaurants I’d ask the people closest if they minded if I smoked. (Not in bars. Screw that; I’m on a mission.) One time in a beauty shop (I can’t call it a salon without feeling like I’m trying to be all _cosmo_) the girl told me to go sit under a dryer now. Naturally I picked the one with an ashtray stand next to it. **All** the other chairs were vacant. The next woman to sit down sat right next to me, snurled her nose in disgust and asked me to put out my cigarette. I’m ashamed to say I did. But what I wanted to do was pick up the stand and knock her upside the head. Which leads me to what I find rude. I haven’t read Emily Post’s _Book of Etiquette_ but to paraphrase a line I read: A lady never makes someone else feel uncomfortable and out-of-place. The example given was, If a guest drinks from the fingerbowl then you do, too. I think people who go out of their way to make other people feel small are rude, because it’s kind of soul-killing. I’m sorry to say I’ve sometimes been guilty. ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/154 "2013-01-14T08:50:33Z")
Those “I’m young and you’re old” jibes, especially when interjected during a discussion wherein that young idiot is benefiting from my knowledge and experience. ---
**Author:** ![GlassSlipper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e9bcb4/32.png) [@GlassSlipper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GlassSlipper)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/155 "2013-01-14T10:32:10Z")
Being called “miss” in a tone that implies I’m twelve. I’m almost thirty. I’m married. I go to bed at eleven o’clock on Friday nights. Family used to give me gift cards for Forever 21. Now I get gift cards to Lowes. Please, please just refrain from “miss.” Hey man, most of our parents took us out in public when we were kids. I’m not paying a babysitter to go grocery shopping for an hour. But yeah, I make it a point to talk kid down or leave if it’s too bad. Tends to behave better in front of others, anyway. As for accessible stalls - unfortunately, that’s where they tend to stick the diaper changing tables and have enough room for a snoozing kid in a stroller or (for the potty-training) enough room for my five foot self and a toddler. Seems like that would be against some rule or another, but there ya go. Use smaller stalls when I’m by myself. One that hasn’t been fully covered - unsolicited advice. Especially things like, “You should eat salmon” and rambling things about alkaline water and how sugar is addictive and to switch to [insert sweetener of the month here]. I’m good, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/156 "2013-01-14T14:06:02Z")
> [@Doggo](#): > > Your reply reminded me that I really hate parents that allow their children to occupy seats on public transport when all seats are full. Especially when they could either sit on their parent’s lap or at the least share one seat. Preferably, they could do what we did when I was young and stand to allow adults to sit. And people who park their backpacks, computer cases, purses, jackets, and other shit on bus seats when other people are standing! I always ask them “Did you pay for that seat.” I once got on a bus when every seat was filled. A woman in the front had two children beside her and the stroller, blanket and toys spread out on both seats beside her. I walked up, pushed the things over to one seat and sat on the other. She screamed “Don’t touch my stuff. How dare you touch my stuff.” I told her that if she didn’t pay for four seats, she could shut up. And speaking of handicapped seats, why is it that young people think being addicted to their electronic devices entitles them to sit in the front. Twice I’ve had to ask one of them to move for this “elderly, handicapped person.” Once no one moved and the bus driver had to ask. Of course, when I sit down I tell them “When you get old and people treat you like shit, remember this moment.” ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/157 "2013-01-14T14:16:36Z")
> [@GlassSlipper](#): > > One that hasn’t been fully covered - unsolicited advice. Especially things like, “You should eat salmon” and rambling things about alkaline water and how sugar is addictive and to switch to [insert sweetener of the month here]. I’m good, thanks. Agreed. I follow the law and the general rules of a polite society, so I’m doing all the things I _ought_ to do. Please don’t tell me what I _should_ or \*shouldn’t \*do. You’re more than welcome to share the woo makes you sleep better and sparkle prettier, but please keep your \*you oughts \*and \*you shoulds \*to yourself. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/158 "2013-01-14T14:54:02Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > Whenever two or more people are gathered for a single purpose, talking on your cell phone is plain rude. Also those people who get so wrapped up in their conversation they don’t notice you trying to get by them. I always scream in their other ear “What am I…FUCKING INVISIBLE???” > > And if you use your iPhone on a public bus, don’t tell me I shouldn’t be looking at it. > [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > And people who park their backpacks, computer cases, purses, jackets, and other shit on bus seats when other people are standing! I always ask them “Did you pay for that seat.” I once got on a bus when every seat was filled. A woman in the front had two children beside her and the stroller, blanket and toys spread out on both seats beside her. I walked up, pushed the things over to one seat and sat on the other. She screamed “Don’t touch my stuff. How dare you touch my stuff.” > > I told her that if she didn’t pay for four seats, she could shut up. Do you ever start with asking people politely to move out of the way or move their things? Things that I find rude and will make me look down on you: Insane people who immediately start in with aggressive, shouting behavior or who paw other people’s belongings before giving them a chance to move. You’re part of the problem, not part of the solution here, if the problem is rude and inconsiderate behavior in public. ---
**Author:** ![Sevencl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@Sevencl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sevencl)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/159 "2013-01-14T16:27:48Z")
> [@Doggo](#): > > Your reply reminded me that I really hate parents that allow their children to occupy seats on public transport when all seats are full. Especially when they could either sit on their parent’s lap or at the least share one seat. Preferably, they could do what we did when I was young and stand to allow adults to sit. **WHY?!** How is an adult more entitled to the seat than a kid? ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849/160 "2013-01-14T16:33:53Z")
Another thing I find rude: smokers who smoke where they’re not supposed to and`or throw their cigarette butts on the ground. I know, I know, it’s been complained about many times on these boards before. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-find-rude-and-will-make-me-look-down-on-you/646849.md?page=9)