# Things I firmly believe about posters I never met **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 4, 2001, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246 "2001-07-04T20:35:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/141 "2001-07-07T17:52:36Z")
I \*\* believe I am the person with the highest post count not mentioned in this thread…before now \*\* ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/142 "2001-07-07T17:57:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by trose \* > \*\*I believe **Jester** is really Haley Joel Osment. \*\* I see dead android dopers named Cecil… ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/143 "2001-07-07T19:25:58Z")
I forgot to add that I’ve thought for some time now that Eutychus is a shunned Amish. Or former Amish, I guess that would be. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/144 "2001-07-07T19:51:35Z")
I honestly and firmly believe that CrankyAsAnOldMan and I are destined somehow. I get a weird tingly feeling every time I see her name. Cranky…I think I love you so what am i so afraid of? I also think that SuaSponte posts from a deep, blood red velvet chair and that Esprix is really my gay ex boyfriend. jarbaby ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/145 "2001-07-07T19:58:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*that Esprix is really my gay ex boyfriend. > > jarbaby \*\* You have one, too? ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/146 "2001-07-07T20:01:43Z")
You _should_ be afraid of Cranky, jarbaby. I’ve met her. She’s terrifyingly nice. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/147 "2001-07-07T20:09:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by wring \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > > \*\*that Esprix is really my gay ex boyfriend. > > > > jarbaby \*\* > > You have one, too? \*\* [RANT] 'fraid so. He was so cute, and a good dresser, loved dancing and shopping and he thought I was funny and witty and beautiful…and he also loved a thin, muscular gymnast at our college. When should I have known he was gay? Oh, I don’t know, but the day that he said he wanted to be a Madonna dancer on her tour should have been a big clue. sigh. I still have a crush on him…even though he decided to come out to all of our friends BEFORE he came out to me. jerk. [/rant] ---
**Author:** ![TheNerd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TheNerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheNerd)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/148 "2001-07-07T20:55:31Z")
I believe that I will meet **Nocturne** some day. I believe that **Ballybay** works too hard and doesn’t post often enough, so she should let me take her out to a night on the town. I believe that what I believe is irrelevant. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/149 "2001-07-07T21:30:27Z")
I believe that **Bumbazine** used to hang out in a swamp in Georgia; spending his time in the company of an Alligator that smokes cigars (seegars?), a Porcupine that wears a tartan hat, and a possum in a striped shirt. Or he _did_ until that Kelly guy got him a job up North, anyway. I _also_ believe that the reason nobody has mentioned _me_ so far, is that I’m simply too good to _be_ believed. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/150 "2001-07-07T22:35:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by CrankyAsAnOldMan \* > \*\*I forgot to add that I’ve thought for some time now that Eutychus is a shunned Amish. Or former Amish, I guess that would be. \*\* Nah, that was **Scylla**. ::runs like _hell_:: **hardygirl** : sorta real-life Laura Croft; very bright, enduring, focused–but much funnier. **Fenris** : a lethally sexy, witty, self-deprecating _force_, sorta Miles Vorkosigan meets Dave Barry. **Arden Ranger** : slightly less disturbed but MUCH more compelling version of “Red Green’s” Ranger Gord. Gord with gonads, doncha know. **Persephone** : ahh, the tough, tender gal with unplumbed depths of funkiness, kindness, mischief, humor… **Superdude** : wry, self-parodying front for a born hellion. **Francesca** : very Botticelli and haunting. A Medici icon, if they’d had a sense of humor. **Redboss** : name sounds very Soviet-stolid but the persona is endlessly whimsical, funny and and damned good company. There are waaayy too many others. Those just scraped the synapes from the top of the brain pan. Great buncha raving individualists hereabouts. It’s always a suprise and a pleasure. Veb ---
**Author:** ![hardygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a3d4f5/32.png) [@hardygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hardygrrl)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/151 "2001-07-07T22:49:51Z")
::blushes:: Lara Croft? Must be the attitude 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/152 "2001-07-07T22:56:22Z")
> [@](#): > > Arden Ranger: slightly less disturbed but MUCH more compelling version of “Red Green’s” Ranger Gord. Gord with gonads, doncha know. After doing a websearch, I firmly believe I am … 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/153 "2001-07-07T23:10:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sengkelat \* > \*\*I believe **CrunchyFrog** looks just like Rowan Atkinson. \*\* That, **sir/ma’am** , is a damnable lie! You can check my homepage (still under construction) for a pic - not the pic _I_ would’ve chosen for there, though. I’ll have to talk to someone about that. And yes, **hardygrrl** , I am a [big softy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=28133). **Arden Ranger** - [Red Green](http://www.redgreen.com/news/news.html) is a Canadian show that can be seen on PBS in the USA. Here’s some info about [Ranger Gord](http://www.redgreen.com/cast/ranger.html) from the official site. ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2001, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/154 "2001-07-07T23:26:07Z")
I saw that, **Crunchy**. I’m just trying to decide how I feel being compared to some of whom it is said > [@](#): > > Gords only friends are the animals. And the bugs. And the plants. And many rocks. Well, actually the rocks think he’s a bit wearing and annoying. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Eo\_Echo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ebca7d/32.png) [@Eo\_Echo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eo_Echo)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/155 "2001-07-08T02:14:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TheNerd \* > \*\*I believe that I will meet **Nocturne** some day. > > I believe that **Ballybay** works too hard and doesn’t post often enough, so she should let me take her out to a night on the town.\*\* I believe **Ballybay** is igpay atinlay. At least her name is. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/156 "2001-07-08T04:15:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TVeblen \* > **Fenris** : a lethally sexy, witty, self-deprecating _force_, sorta Miles Vorkosigan meets Dave Barry. > \*\* \ :: wipes tear from eye :: Veb, of all the nice things that anyone’s said about me in this thread, _that’s_ gotta be the nicest. And you, of course, have the coolness of Cordelia, the wit of Aral and the niceness of…um…his girlfriend who’s name escapes me. And I don’t _think_ that, I know it. 🙂 Fenris ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/157 "2001-07-08T04:27:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor \* > \*\*I believe that **Bumbazine** used to hang out in a swamp in Georgia; spending his time in the company of an Alligator that smokes cigars (seegars?), a Porcupine that wears a tartan hat, and a possum in a striped shirt. > > Or he _did_ until that Kelly guy got him a job up North, anyway.\*\* And I was doing pretty well with it too, until one night I came down with the flu and my understudy had to go on in my place. Who woulda thought a possum would be more believeable in the part? > [@](#): > > \*\* > I _also_ believe that the reason nobody has mentioned _me_ so far, is that I’m simply too good to _be_ believed. 🆒 \*\* I believe the reason nobody’s mentioned you so far is that nobody can figure out how to pronounce your name. I’ve always thought you must be the last Knight Templar, passing your time operating a curiousity shop in New York City until the day comes when your uncanny skill with the sword will be needed again. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/158 "2001-07-08T05:42:25Z")
I believe that if Spartacus was a gladiator slave from Sparta, then Eutychus is a gladiator mod from Utica, N.Y.! I believe Sua Sponte is a self-motivator! I believe Slortar watches old Barney videos when he thinks no one can see him. ---
**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/159 "2001-07-08T06:04:46Z")
I believe that everyone who has posted to this thread is shy and bashful. Of course, I also believe that the Al Gore REALLY won, so why should you listen to me? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2001, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246/160 "2001-07-08T10:55:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \* > **…I’m certain that screech-owl not only does not screech, but that she has a soothing, melodious voice…** I screech only when I get really really torqued off about something. I’ve been told I ave a ‘radio voice’ well-suited for classical, nostalgia or smooth jazz stations:“_And now, Kenny G’s version of “The White Cliffs of Dover”, with the Royal Concertgebouw Orchestra, guest conductor Riccaro Muti_”. Maybe I ought to consider a career change… > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Bumbazine_ > **I belive Screech Owl sneaks about the countryside on weekends, capturing wild Muscovy ducks and taking them to a secret research facility she has set up in a huge nondescript warehouse.** Chiesu, I’ve been found out! Oh don’t EEEEEEVEN get me started on Muscovy ducks, the Tribbles of the wild duck world (and they’re not even wild). Now if only I could find a large enough warehouse… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-firmly-believe-about-posters-i-never-met/71246.md?page=9)