# Things I learned from 1980s scifi movies. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 3, 2009, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174 "2009-03-03T18:39:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/61 "2009-03-05T12:04:50Z")
> [@Darwins\_Finch](#): > > Chewing tobacco will make you a goddamn sexual Tyrannosaurus. Just like me. Is that good or bad? ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/62 "2009-03-05T13:38:45Z")
When you’re checking everyone’s blood sample with a red-hot wire, make sure your flame thrower is ready to deal with the alien when you discover it. ---
**Author:** ![DirkGntly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DirkGntly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DirkGntly)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/63 "2009-03-05T14:02:51Z")
Crossing the charged-energy plasma streams will send demons back to their dimension… …also, turning off the power grid is a Very Bad Thing™ and will result in an EPA official being called “dickless” ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/64 "2009-03-05T14:07:54Z")
Don’t trust the six fingered man when trying to sell a sword. Never bet against a Sicilian when death is on the line. The loser doesn’t matter, only the Princess matters. ---
**Author:** ![A\_Dodgy\_Dude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a87d85/32.png) [@A\_Dodgy\_Dude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/A_Dodgy_Dude)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/65 "2009-03-05T14:24:17Z")
If you see a helicopter full of Norwegian scientists trying to shoot a dog, for God’s sake – help them do it! Space vampires walk around naked in public - fortunately for us they are beautiful with perfect bodies. In space no one can hear you scream. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/66 "2009-03-05T14:33:55Z")
Scientists really like Alice in wonderland. they are sure to use names and quotes from it, or create an AI called Alice. Jaberwocky, Snark, Boojum, and Cheshire Cat are close seconds for Alice. ---
**Author:** ![JXJohns](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jxjohns/32/469_2.png) [@JXJohns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JXJohns)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/67 "2009-03-05T14:36:10Z")
> [@DirkGntly](#): > > Crossing the charged-energy plasma streams will send demons back to their dimension… When doing so, AIM FOR THE FLAT TOP BOYS! ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/68 "2009-03-05T14:59:03Z")
> [@WarmNPrickly](#): > > It is amazingly easy for some kid with a dial up modem to log into his schools computer (which for some reason is connected to an internet in the early eighties) and change his grades. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve no doubt that there was a period in the mid nineties when careless school administrators left their unprotected files connected, but in the early eighties why was it connected to the internet in the first place? Was there even an internet then? > > Also, computers that control nuclear launch codes are connected and protected by a mere password that could easily be guessed at. Although in light of the helicopter fiasco, it seems they more or less got it right. 1. The school’s computer was directly accessed via a modem. A lot of systems were available by dialup then. No Internet required. Note that such direct modem connections was used heavily throughout the movie. 2. The “Joshua” thing was a _back door_ put in by Falken. The whole point of David going to see the nerds was to so that he could be told to look for a back door. The current admins actually said that they didn’t know about it and blocked that dial-in method (but not the dial-out). (Now if you were to complain that if you walked from the KCTS building towards the forestry building you are not going to get to the computer center, then you would be right.) I strongly suggest you re-watch the movie several times. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/69 "2009-03-05T15:11:49Z")
[quote=“A\_Dodgy\_Dude, post:65, topic:488174”] If you see a helicopter full of Norwegian scientists trying to shoot a dog, for God’s sake – help them do it! [QUOTE] Werent they Swedish? ---
**Author:** ![RiverRunner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/977dab/32.png) [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/70 "2009-03-05T15:21:05Z")
Laser beams are visible in clean air. ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/71 "2009-03-05T15:26:23Z")
Many of the truths you cling to depend greatly on your point of view. That cool guy you think is really in it for the money? Nah, he’s OK. Governments and militaries don’t care about society - they just want the next best weapon. Do not trust their agents. If you’re given magical words to say, remember them. Saying them mostly won’t count. ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/72 "2009-03-05T15:51:35Z")
Old Chinese dudes are _magic!_ ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Slant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c57346/32.png) [@Mr.Slant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Slant)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/73 "2009-03-05T16:12:29Z")
> [@WarmNPrickly](#): > > It is amazingly easy for some kid with a dial up modem to log into his schools computer (which for some reason is connected to an internet in the early eighties) and change his grades. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve no doubt that there was a period in the mid nineties when careless school administrators left their unprotected files connected, but in the early eighties why was it connected to the internet in the first place? Was there even an internet then? > > Also, computers that control nuclear launch codes are connected and protected by a mere password that could easily be guessed at. Although in light of the helicopter fiasco, it seems they more or less got it right. > > Actually maybe both aren’t that unlikely. If both the student and the administrators computer regularly logged onto some USENET server or whatever they used back then, perhaps the student could find a weakness and exploit it. The school computers had a dial-up modem set to answer incoming calls. It wouldn’t be ludicrous to imagine a school IT vendor setting up such a line for use by tech support from the vendor. Ludcrious would be a school that wasn’t too stingy to pay for a dedicated line… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tof](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@The\_Tof](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tof)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/74 "2009-03-05T16:14:49Z")
> [@LawMonkey](#): > > I’m surprised that no one has remembered this important wisdom: > > Be excellent to each other. **AND** PARTY ON DUDES! What we really should learn from this- is that two goofy future Rock and Roll stars are going to rule over the world. > [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > There are no fat people in the future ( except Jabba the Hut.) (Um… weren’t those movies “A long time ago…” (In a galaxy far far away)? Or did I take that too literally) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Batman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/22d042/32.png) [@The\_Batman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Batman)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/75 "2009-03-05T16:28:04Z")
If it bleeds, we can kill it. You, OTOH, will probably not have time to bleed. The douchebag is Hudson, the other one is Hicks. Cyborgs run on nothing but baby food. Sometimes, the only way to win is not to play. ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/76 "2009-03-05T16:36:52Z")
Many of the world’s greatest heroes and villians at this time came from the same muscle bound, Austrian stock 😉 ---
**Author:** ![RiverRunner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/977dab/32.png) [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/77 "2009-03-05T16:52:31Z")
> [@The\_Tof](#): > > (Um… weren’t those movies “A long time ago…” (In a galaxy far far away)? Or did I take that too literally) Yes, but they were set in the far, far future, so they were still in the present-day future, see? OK, it’s all I got. ---
**Author:** ![MOIDALIZE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@MOIDALIZE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MOIDALIZE)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/78 "2009-03-05T18:30:30Z")
The Justice Department’s Entertainment Division can be convinced to support anything so long as the ratings are good. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/79 "2009-03-05T18:35:32Z")
In space, no one **but the audience** can hear you scream. ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2009, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174/80 "2009-03-05T21:15:22Z")
Never forget where you left your genetically engineered, megalomaniacal(sp?) enemies. Some bozo looking for a completely lifeless planet to test their [del]ultimate superweapon[/del] scientific excperiments on may accidentally stumble across them, and through the lack of anything resembling internal security, hand over a pretty whupass starship to them so they can come looking for you for vengence. Star_fleet_ seems to only ever have one ship in the quadrant. Whales will save us. God needs starships. Oops, sorry. That’s “God.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-learned-from-1980s-scifi-movies/488174.md?page=5)