# Things I Would Change About Myself

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 13, 2004, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047 "2004-10-13T18:30:15Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\
**Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047/21 "2004-10-14T17:12:55Z")

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I’d have the greatest, thickest hair anyone had ever seen and I could command it to move by will alone.

Barring that, some chrome antlers would be nifty.

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**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\
**Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047/22 "2004-10-14T17:21:53Z")

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I want a pony.

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**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\
**Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047/23 "2004-10-14T18:24:41Z")

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I want to be smarter, more articulate, more ambitious, and have some big ol’ boobs.

What?

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**Author:** ![Tiggrkitty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggrkitty/32/17966_2.png) [@Tiggrkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tiggrkitty)\
**Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047/24 "2004-10-14T18:31:32Z")

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> [@Dung Beetle](#):
>
> I want to be smarter, more articulate, more ambitious, and have some big ol’ boobs.  
> What?

Trust me, the boobs are highly over rated. Off roading - out. Jogging - out. Any form of exercise that causes them to bounce; you will end up binding those puppies down or you end up in pain.

☹

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**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\
**Post date:** [October 14, 2004, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-i-would-change-about-myself/269047/25 "2004-10-14T18:53:03Z")

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Oh, okay then. I’ll settle for some medium boobs. 🙂

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