# Things in your desk.... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 19, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501 "2000-10-19T04:02:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/21 "2000-10-19T17:37:26Z")
I have a mess of papers and receipts on my desk, along with the computer. In the drawers, I have too many things to list, so here’s a random sample: assortment of small screwdrivers “for deposit only” stamp staple puller white-out scissors (2 pairs) tape art gum eraser one pen (missing cap) empty pencil box various birthday cards (blank with envelopes) film canister five spiral notebooks wooden ruler Leatherman tool calculator wire cutters a remote control 3-hole punch coin wrappers bunny Pez dispenser digital camera pillar candle twine I also have a nameplate and pictures of my kids on the windowsill. The pathetic thing is that this is my desk at HOME. I felt so lonely without my office tools when I quit work to stay home with the kids that I went out and bought some for myself, even though I really don’t use regularly enough to justify it. ---
**Author:** ![Fletch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/919ad9/32.png) [@Fletch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fletch)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/22 "2000-10-19T18:00:24Z")
I started my new job three years ago and was given a work station the previous employee had not cleaned out. I acquired a pack of Beaman gum, a pack of clove gum, a half pack of Black Jack gum, bandaids, and photos of people I don’t know. The strange things were what looked like an inner tube for a wheel barrow and the worst of all, a greasy, thumb imprinted, half tube of Preparation H. I was later informed that the person using the Preparation H sat on the wheel barrow inner tube. The entire lot is now residing in the local land fill. ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/23 "2000-10-19T18:30:21Z")
My client keeps a cube for me. It’s a complete disaster area, in a six by six cube, my area looks like the computer Gods puked in there. I have 4 desktop computers, 3 laptops, 4 network cards, a scanner, an external CDRW, 10 CDRs that mysteriously appeared one day, screw drivers, 2 patch cables, papers and more papers, CDs of programs people just piled in my cube. That doesn’t include the stuff inside the drawers – nothing unusual for a computer person but boy if you could see it you’d wonder. Everytime I go in there, there is a new surprize for me. Since I am not there a lot it doesn’t get cleaned up by me. Maybe I should go in on a weekend and clean it up, bet the president just shakes his head when he walks by. Oh and yes the server room looks like a disaster area too. I am not a very neat person. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/24 "2000-10-19T18:46:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by brachyrhynchos \* > \*\* > > **lurkernomore** - absolutely right about rubberbands as ammunition. Roller chairs are getaway cars or jousting steeds if the hallways are wide enough. \*\* ``` Hey, why do you think they invented cubicles? Cover. ``` ---
**Author:** ![Purd\_Werfect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47c2d/32.png) [@Purd\_Werfect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Purd_Werfect)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/25 "2000-10-19T18:59:38Z")
3 Wheelo’s A sign which says “Helldesk” that used to hang over the Helpdesk that I managed at one time. A VHS tape of the IMAX film Everest Deodorant Baby Powder A CD from a very old Comdex. The CD has Bill Gates holding an unplugged keyboard on the cover and is titled “Bill Gates Unplugged”. A Linux penguin. 11 empty Diet Pepsi cans. Thousands of pieces of paper. t-shirts. Lots of t-shirts. A stack of about 200 nameplates of former co-workers, as I used to maintain the company “Wall of Shame”. A few hundred software CD’s. By my desk is a full-sized roll-feed plotter used for technical diagrams. And a fridge filled with beer fits nicely under the desk. And then there’s the photos of friends and the plethora of little toys given out as freebies by companies. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/26 "2000-10-19T19:13:19Z")
You inspired me to look in my top drawer, which I haven’t done for weeks. (I have a lot of desktop space, so I just accumulate all my crap right out in the open air, until the desk gets too messy and I sweep it all into the trash and begin again.) There’s my old pipe from college. Tobacco pipe, I mean. Just in case I suddenly decide to give up cigarettes. It’s a really weird-looking pipe, the kind of thing an undergrad would pick out for himself. Made in Denmark out of cherrywood, short and stubby and with a WIDE flat round bowl. Some people said it looked like a flying saucer; some people said it looked like a toilet bowl. Some extra flints for my Zippo. One of those pocket electric fans. Some Zig-Zag rolling papers. A spare Cosmic Wimpout cube. And BUTTONS. Fifteen years’ accumulation of buttons, picked up for the most part at trade shows. Here’s one that says “Available for Children’s Parties.” Here’s one that says “We Apologize for Any Inconvenience Caused by Our Greed and Arrogance.” ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/27 "2000-10-19T19:24:57Z")
I try to keep my office fairly neat ‘n’ clean, in case I am overcome with the urge to storm out and never come back. Nothing remontely odd in my desk drawers, sorry to relate. On my desk, of course, I have that framed photo of the woman who jumped off the Empire State Building in 1947 (which you may remember from my thread last month). On the lighter side, I have a panoramic photo (5 inches high, 3 feet long) of the touring company of “Miss Innocence” outside the Broadway Theater (Denver) on December 7, 1911. Ike, don’t you still have the photo of Ruth Snyder in the elecric chair up in your office? ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/28 "2000-10-19T19:40:03Z")
Yup. On the corkboard, along with the photo of the airport in Great Falls, Montana, the I BRAKE FOR OLD GRAVEYARDS bumpersticker, the potrait of Sam Ketchum, my old membership card for the “Melkweg Multi-media Centrum” in Amsterdam, the reproduction of one of Francis Bacon’s Screaming Popes, the Creole/West African juju, and the card from Katz’s Deli, in case I have a sudden overwhelming urge to mail someone a salami. But those aren’t in my desk, so I didn’t mention them. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/29 "2000-10-19T20:02:18Z")
" . . . in case I have a sudden overwhelming urge to mail someone a salami." —There you go, with your euphemisms again . . . ---
**Author:** ![Belle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a698b9/32.png) [@Belle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belle)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/30 "2000-10-19T20:37:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Beelzebubba \* > **… knives, forks, spoons, sporks (yes, SPORKS!)** Are you sure they aren’t FOONS? 😃 I have on my desk the usual assortment of office stuff, including several photos of my daughter and nephews. In my drawer I have some _really good_ cold tablets. 🆒 (Can’t remember if they helped my cold, but I liked 'em!) ---
**Author:** ![Peta\_Tzunami](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@Peta\_Tzunami](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peta_Tzunami)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/31 "2000-10-19T20:39:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Falcon \* > \*\*Peta hon…you forgot to mention that it’s a broken Angel action figure. 🙂 \*\* Oh, only his sword was broken so I don’t consider that a broken Angel. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wonko_The_Sane)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2000, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501/32 "2000-10-19T21:52:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tymp \* > \*\*My company is a little old fashioned. When an employee “leaves”, all of his office stuff is buried with his body along with his still living wives, servants and livestock. Because of this, I never inherit stuff when I take a new desk. If you do take, say, the stapler of a “departed” employee, you, all of your descendants and every one on your org chart will be cursed for a thousand generations with locusts, maggots, madness, poor margins and unfortunate revenue growth trends. \*\* \*\*\*As it should be. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-in-your-desk/37501.md?page=1)