# Things I've misread recently **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 16, 2004, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492 "2004-07-16T21:38:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/1 "2004-07-16T21:38:20Z")
I subscribe to some Washington Post news alerts and today I got one with the following subject line: > [@](#): > > News Alert: Stewart Sentenced to 5 Months in Prison Somehow my brain just subtracted a few letters to: > [@](#): > > News Alert: Stewart Sentenced to 5 Months in Prison I thought – Al Stewart? _The Year of the Cat_ guy? What the hell did HE do. That IS news. ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/2 "2004-07-16T21:58:01Z")
I recently misread a sign. I saw “Porno Pix” when it really said “Promo Pix.” I even told other people about the sign that advertised the porno pix. Oops. :o ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/3 "2004-07-16T22:40:58Z")
Loosest progressive sluts…on a sign in Reno, Nevada… HEy, I was very tired, and I knew prostitution ws legal in some areas of Nevada, and I am not a gambler so I had never heard of progressive slot machines, nor that if they were ‘loose’ they paid out more frequently…and I was driving past the sign at about 70… ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/4 "2004-07-17T03:46:30Z")
Drove by a giant billboard today that read **"PARTY CATERERS."** I read it as **"PARTY CATHETERS."** And I shrugged and thought “Well, I’m sure someone on the Internet is really into that stuff!” ---
**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/5 "2004-07-17T04:31:44Z")
Driving through a construction zone late one night I misread a sign to say **BLIMP** instead of **BUMP**. Took me a few minutes to realize that the Goodyear Blimp was not actually hovering overhead (though some days it is!) ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/6 "2004-07-17T05:33:34Z")
I’ve misread “Build to suit” as “Build to slut.” And I’ve seen the slogan “Ditches are deadly–stay away” (designed to keep kids from skateboarding in the irrigation channels) as “Bitches are deadly.” Then there was the time I was reading a book about Led Zeppelin. It mentioned Jimmy Page’s guitar prick. I was surprised and impressed, until I reread the sentences and realized the word was “pick.” I complained about all this once to my mother, telling her I had a problem with my eyes. After I described some of the examples of misreading things she said the problem wasn’t with my eyes. I guess Freud would have a field day. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/7 "2004-07-17T06:30:21Z")
On the side of a removals truck I misread **uniformed** staff and came up with **uninformed** instead. ---
**Author:** ![Rayne\_Man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/df705f/32.png) [@Rayne\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rayne_Man)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/8 "2004-07-17T19:54:59Z")
Another sign I constantly misread is \*\*shop lifters \*\* for **shop fitters** ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/9 "2004-07-17T20:12:16Z")
Well for a start, this thread. “Things I’ve missed recently” ---
**Author:** ![Burrido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Burrido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Burrido)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2004, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ive-misread-recently/255492/10 "2004-07-18T16:18:42Z")
No Parking 6 am to 8 am. Misread to my discomfort, No Parking 6pm to 8pm.