# Things Movies Almost Always Get Wrong **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 7, 2011, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494 "2011-02-07T06:45:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/41 "2011-02-07T15:51:39Z")
> [@Jim\_s\_Son](#): > > A lot of movies from the 1950s inevitably have computers with huge banks of different colored lights (“Desk Set”, “Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea”). That’s not so much a “get wrong” thing as a “technological prediction failure.” And hard SF writers committed worse errors in that regard all the time. ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/42 "2011-02-07T15:51:50Z")
The way railroads and trains operate must be a mystery to TV and movie writers. Passenger cars are not mixed into the same train as freight equipment. Well, since about 1900 anyway. Cutting or disconnecting the air hose between cars causes the brakes to automatically slam ON, instead of _disabling_ the brakes as TV would have you believe. Also, the meme of putting something heavy onto the pedal so the train runs unattended. Un-uh, doesn’t work that way. You have to monitor alarms or the train will go into full shutdown. They often portray trains stations with equipment that would not be there. Such as a full Union Pacific passenger train pulling into the station in Miami, for instance. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/43 "2011-02-07T15:53:03Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > All elderly Jews speak with an Eastern European, Yiddish accent. > > I once saw a college production of Merchant of Venice in which Shylock spoke with a Yiddisher accent. Wasn’t he from Venice? **All** the characters are from Venice (or Belmont), but we wouldn’t expect them to speak English with an Italian accent. (Though maybe on the stage of the Globe they did exactly that, who knows?) ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/44 "2011-02-07T15:54:29Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > I worked as a desk clerk for years when I was in high school. Several things drive me nuts in a TV & movies set in hotels: > > When somebody walks up to a front desk and says “What room is Joe Jenkins in?” and the clerk says “Room 232- up the stairs and to the left”- this is a major no-no (in fact a firing offense) in most hotels… In all fairness it USED to be like this. I worked in hotels my whole life and as late as 1994 I still worked in hotles that you gave out info UNLESS TOLD NOT TO. This is the opposite of what is done today. > [@Sampiro](#): > > Likewise, nobody actually signs a book register anymore. Even in small towns and even in the few remaining Mom’n’Pop motels in all but the cheapest hotels or perhaps a couple of B&Bs run by 90 year olds it’s all computerized. Again not I’ve worked with small hotels that aren’t at all computerized. Some smaller franchises still use sign in and ledgers to post. There’s no need for an computer in a 100 room or less hotel. I do realize there are free POS and free hotel systems, but some owners just don’t want them > [@Sampiro](#): > > Also you NEVER leave a front desk unattended for more than a moment. This happens today, and it happened in the old days. I was a night auditor and to make budget I’d leave the front desk and go clean a room to resell it. I wouldn’t be gone long. I’d lock the cash in the back safe and go for about 15 minutes at a time. I agree with this poster as a general rule in modern day hotels, but there are still many small hotels (under 100 rooms) that don’t use computers (a ledger system IS really just as simple) and it did used to be that way ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/45 "2011-02-07T15:56:35Z")
> [@](#): > > That’s not so much a “get wrong” thing as a “technological prediction failure.” And hard SF writers committed worse errors in that regard all the time. It’s not a prediction failure – it’s a Looks Cool, which always trumps reason and common sense. If you go to the site I link to in entry #17, you’ll see that they are still using those banks of flashing lights from the SAGE computer in TV and movies today. ---
**Author:** ![McReady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@McReady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/McReady)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/46 "2011-02-07T15:57:02Z")
“Ship will self-destruct in T minus five minutes.” I blame Riddley Scott for this one – or at least, the earliest instance I can think of is in _Alien_. No, you stupid ship’s computer. The ship will blow up in _five minutes_. “T minus five minutes” is a description of _what time it is now._ At the moment the ship blows up, the time will be T. Five minutes after that, the time will be T _plus_ five minutes. I’ve seen (or rather heard) this same stupid error in countless movies and tv shows since then. “Core explosion in T minus sixty seconds.” What the fuck do they think “T minus” means? And how could a generation that grew up watching NASA rocket launches have failed to grasp this simple concept? ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/47 "2011-02-07T15:58:35Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > **All** the characters are from Venice (or Belmont), but we wouldn’t expect them to speak English with an Italian accent. (Though maybe on the stage of the Globe they did exactly that, who knows?) But at least that would be more internally consistent than having Shylock speaking like a Polish Jew when everyone was un-accented! Let them all have Italian accents or none at all. But it was- he’s Jewish and old- must have a Yiddisher accent! ---
**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/48 "2011-02-07T16:03:42Z")
Sleazy drug lords, third world warlords, and mafia dons prefer to deal personally with the tough cop or vigilante that has been a thorn in his side. Thugs readily gang up on relatively helpless victims, but tend to encircle someone with real fighting skills and attempt to take him on one at a time instead of overpowering him with sheer numbers. Women always orgasm every time they have sex unless it’s required to show how unsatisfied they are with their current husband/lover. Military vets, especially special forces vets, will snap at any time and start killing people in random and creative ways. A corollary to the “animals always make noises” one: whenever any terrestrial predator is about to strike, they growl or roar dramatically even if they are ambush predators like crocodiles or lions, which luckily does not seem to alert their prey so they can escape. This carries over to reconstructions of dinosaurs; Tyrannosaurus rex spends time stealthily stalking prey at the watering hole whilst hiding on the edge of the forest clearing, then roars loudly before darting out at the herd of hadrosaurs or triceratops. High flashy spin kicks are the most effective and efficient way to fight other highly-trained combatants. If cops aren’t the main characters, they’re either corrupt or totally incompetent. If they are the main characters (and assuming it’s not a comedy) then the cops are vigilantes who achieve justice at any cost. You can create an effective zip line with a long rope, a bow and arrow, and a belt, and you can shoot the arrow with rope attached to it with perfect accuracy. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/49 "2011-02-07T16:06:19Z")
> [@](#): > > “Ship will self-destruct in T minus five minutes.” One of the most over-used cliches in SF film. It’s obviously supposed to be the equivalent of “scuttling” a ship – but, of course, you can’t pry up the stops at the bottom of your space ship hull and expect it to sink. The first time this was used, it was used correctly – **Robinson Crusoe on Mars** from 1964 has the hero destructing his orbiting but unreachable space ship so that the aliens can’t use it to help locate him, just as Daniel DeFoe’s hero gets rid of the hulk of his wrecked ship so as not to give a landmark for the pirates. The space ship disappeared in a distant blip of light, unspectacularly. In the 1960s, _Star Trek_ introduced the idea of a self-destruct in space ships to visual SF. Although they threatened to use it, I think the only time they actually did was **The Doomsday Machine**. It served a useful plot point. But then, as you say, Ridley Scott’s **Alien** gave us a ship with self-destruct built into it, and the now-requisite spectacular explosion. It wasn’t even really needed, strictly speaking – once Ripley was off the ship, the expectation would be that the creature was unable to hurt her. In a universe devoid of sequels, it would’ve starved. After that, the damned things proliferated. Finally, the TV movie _Something is Out There_ made appropriate fun of the idea: Earth Guy: Don’t you have a Self-Destruct on this ship? Alien Babe: No!! Why would anyone have anything like that? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/50 "2011-02-07T16:09:01Z")
A diversion is needed, more often than not in a police station, so someone holds a match to an overhead sprinkler, causing all the sprinklers, the entire system, to spray out water and create havoc. My understanding is only the sprinkler(s) feeling the heat will spray water, not every single one in a building or on a floor. Insurance companies would go berserk at all the needless water damage. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_T](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Gary\_T](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_T)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/51 "2011-02-07T16:10:22Z")
It doesn’t come up often, but whenever something related to automobile problems and repairs is depicted, it’s laughably wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/52 "2011-02-07T16:11:00Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > Or people themselves who, for whatever reasons, have wings. You might be able to glide downward at an alarming rate, but never actually fly with the wings Hollywood gives you. In Angels: An Endangered Species bu Malcolm Godwin, he works out that a 6’ male angel of standard “human” proportions would need a minimum 36’ wing span to fly. And a bone spur of about 4’ jutting from his sternum to anchor the additional muscles. ---
**Author:** ![kapri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4491bb/32.png) [@kapri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kapri)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/53 "2011-02-07T16:11:56Z")
Sooo many things. All of the things mentioned here, plus these, which I know everyone else has noticed too: - Getting DNA results in mere hours instead of the weeks it usually takes. - Getting drug test results on deceased persons in hours instead of the weeks or months it takes. - Getting AFIS results (fingerprint matches) in minutes. This can take days IRL. - Florida errors, although there have been fewer of these lately with the popularity of Florida-filmed shows. These include seeing mountains in the background and front license plates on cars. We’ve got no mountains here and no state-issued front license plates. - Drivers having conversations with passengers and taking their eyes off the road for many seconds at a time to talk to them. - The rear-view mirror being removed from the windshield in cars. Makes for fewer obstructions–I get that. But still. - On _CSI: Miami,_ which I’ve stopped watching, every home in which a crime has taken place is sunny and modern and spotless, except for the crime remains (blood spots or what have you). In reality, most homes in the Miami area are smallish stucco homes, many with bars on the windows, and if you go into any home in the U.S. you will see a variety of furnishings, jackets thrown over the backs of chairs, dishes in the sink, shoes strewn around. - There are so many more, but this list is getting long! ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/54 "2011-02-07T16:15:31Z")
> [@brocks](#): > > And I would defy anyone not starring in Cirque du Soleil to hang by one hand from a slender vertical rope for even two seconds. Your grip just isn’t strong enough. I can do it. I pole dance. I bet I could hang on to a rope for a good 2 minutes. I could easily climb one in two minutes. 🆒 I am female, 5’ 2" and weigh all of 110 lbs. soaking wet with my hooker heels on. 🆒 :: flexes pole grip hand :: ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/55 "2011-02-07T16:17:03Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > My dad was in the infantry in WWII in Europe. He told me many times that when he first hid behind marble tombstones from German fire, he was stunned to see each rifle bullet would split the tombstone it hit and knock it right over, exposing the man hiding behind it. Later, he got up and ran beside a moving freight train, using a boxcar for cover, and machine-gun bullets punched right through the side of the train, walking down the car towards him. He said he hit the dirt again, furiously thinking “The movies LIED to me!” What movies get wrong about the military could fill a book. The main characters’ haircuts are rarely regulation. Sure, special ops typically have relaxed grooming standards, but a sould patch is not a relaxed grooming standard. You don’t salute indoors unless you’re reporting to an officer. The cover (hat, beret, helmet, whatever’s on your head) comes off when you go indoors, unless you’re armed. All generals are apparently grizzled and angry and ready to stage a coup at the drop of a hat. ---
**Author:** ![McReady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@McReady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/McReady)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/56 "2011-02-07T16:22:12Z")
Movies typically overestimate the lifting power of helium, often by at least an order of magnitude. Many examples, but the worst may be in _The Mummy Returns_, featuring a [dirigible with an envelope barely larger than its sturdy wooden gondola.](http://www.alicia-logic.com/capsimages/mr_357OdedFehr.jpg) If something like that would actually fly, you’d see them all over the place. ---
**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/57 "2011-02-07T16:24:27Z")
Not a movie, but playing the video game Infamous makes my arms hurt. One of my husband’s favorite things to do is take the dude up to the top of the ‘trash pile’ and jump off it and try to catch-hang on a first-floor ledge below. (If you’re not familiar with the game, the main character is essentially a cross between Spiderman, Batman, and Magneto (if Magneto also shot lightning) and the trash heap is this tall-ass (100 floors? maybe more?) structure built out of industrial refuse and shitloads of cargo containers.) As for TV and movies, one that always gets me is the “instant perfect Google search” which can be seen most offensively in Twilight, but it shows up everywhere. It’s such a cheap and lazy fix for an info-dump, and I hate to break it to you, but most of the sites on the net (especially those turned up with a general Google search) aren’t that image heavy and are certainly not quality information about the restricted/specific focus of whatever the producers needed. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/58 "2011-02-07T16:31:31Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > There are so many sitcoms get set in an old hotel a family or group of friends runs … On _Newhart_ for example: the real B&B they use for the exterior shots has about a dozen employees rather than the two owners and two employees on the show, and a large hotel is going to have several times that. Also you NEVER leave a front desk unattended for more than a moment. It really depends on the exact size of the place, doesn’t it? I’ve stayed in a B&B where there were _zero_ employees, just the two owners. There was a maid service, but it was contracted out. They weren’t there around the clock. > [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#): > > I love X-rays in medical shows. There’s always a melange of films of random body parts hung up in random orientations on light boxes, a technology that no longer really exists anymore. Light boxes don’t exist any more? I could have sworn I’ve seen them around in my doctors’ offices. > [@CalMeacham](#): > > It’s not a prediction failure – it’s a Looks Cool, which always trumps reason and common sense. It’s actually a reality failure – reality failing to look as cool as it should. > [@Cuckoorex](#): > > Women always orgasm every time they have sex unless it’s required to show how unsatisfied they are with their current husband/lover. To be fair, they’re not showing you _every time_ these women have sex, only the times that the sex is good. And this might be a generational thing, but anecdotally I have found that most women usually expect to climax. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/59 "2011-02-07T16:46:37Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > All elderly Jews speak with an Eastern European, Yiddish accent. Maybe they’re faking it. 😉 Certainly there is no shortage of Jews can imitate someone from the Old Country even if they’ve never been there. > [@](#): > > I once saw a college production of Merchant of Venice in which Shylock spoke with a Yiddisher accent. Wasn’t he from Venice? He’s _in_ Venice. I don’t think we know where he’s _from_. > [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > But at least that would be more internally consistent than having Shylock speaking like a Polish Jew when everyone was un-accented! Let them all have Italian accents or none at all. But it was- he’s Jewish and old- must have a Yiddisher accent! Kidding aside, yes, that’s stereotypical and ridiculous. I can see giving only Shylock an accent to help set him apart. We did Merchant of Venice when I was in high school and that’s how we did it. It would have sounded ridiculous if 20 kids were trying to do Shakespeare with Italian accents; having Shylock do a restrained but credible accent made sense. (Our Shylock did an Israeli accent. His parents were Israeli and he had that one down cold.) Making Shylock sound like a Mel Brooks character would just be distracting. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2011, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494/60 "2011-02-07T16:53:26Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > People usually taking turns to talk. So true, even at parties and in other groups of people. One shout of “listen up” and the room falls silent too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-movies-almost-always-get-wrong/570494.md?page=4)