# Things Ninjas Don't Say **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 20, 2001, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146 "2001-02-20T00:52:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![inor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f475e1/32.png) [@inor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inor)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/41 "2001-02-20T18:05:07Z")
you stupid dummy peehead… Hey man, I got no problem with you, dude, it’s all good… Shit man, this is the **Kind!** Hey man, can I bum a smoke off ya? I’ll buy ya a pack later… …17 hours of labor!!! I was like all,'Give me drugs!! damn it hurtssss! And they’re like all tellin me to breathe and shit…I mean god, sherry, is that lame or what?.." Dudes! I gotta work tomorrow! Ok? Kill KIll kill, assasinate sneak sneak murder! Y’know, I’ve **had** it with this!! What about _MY_ needs… ---
**Author:** ![inor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f475e1/32.png) [@inor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inor)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/42 "2001-02-20T18:11:41Z")
I _know_ that joke! It’s _hilarious!_ ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/43 "2001-02-20T18:24:48Z")
**2! 4! 6! 8! TIPTOE, SNEAK, AND IN- FIL- TRATE! _Cha-ha-cha!_**😃 With apologies to the Harvard Lampoon, whose joke this is… ---
**Author:** ![TKD2DAN](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dbc845/32.png) [@TKD2DAN](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TKD2DAN)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/44 "2001-02-20T20:13:26Z")
“I’m not gonna kill 'em. You kill 'em.” “I’m not gonna kill 'em.” “Let’s get Mikey!” “YEAH!” “He will kill 'em, he hates everything!” * * * OHHH MANNNN!, I knew I forgot something. ---
**Author:** ![RonA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/73ab20/32.png) [@RonA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RonA)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/45 "2001-02-20T20:51:17Z")
“Hey, watch this! I saw this killer move on Hong Kong Phooey…” “I’d like to use one of my life lines.” “Shut up, Beavis.” “So, what _does_ happen on May 33rd, but only on Leap Years?” ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/46 "2001-02-20T21:13:01Z")
1. “…and then he threw a CHIMNEY at us…” 2. “We are a bush. Move along. Nothing to see here…” ---
**Author:** ![Inky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7feea3/32.png) [@Inky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inky_1)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/47 "2001-02-20T21:25:34Z")
Seriously, my high school guidence counsellor steered me tward this! Sure, sure. I’m flipping, I’m climbing, I’m stalking, I’m stabbing and killing, but I’m just not _enjoying_… Oh! _I’m so embarrased_. Becky’s wearing the exact same outfit as me!! ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/48 "2001-02-20T21:32:30Z")
“Oh, sot this! I never wanted to be a Ninja! I always wanted to be…A LUMBERJACK!!! Leaping from tree to tree on the mighty rivers of British Columbia. And with my best girl at my side, we’d sing, sing, sing…” ---
**Author:** ![Wolverine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wolverine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolverine)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/49 "2001-02-20T21:47:01Z")
What’s the secret hand signal again for “I have to go to the bathroom?” Top five marial arts songs exculisevly from the eighties. Scrunch or fold? (Toilet paper for those not in the know) You put your right foot in, you pull your right foot out. You put your right foot in and you shake it all about. You do the Hokey-Pokey and you turn yourself around. That’s what it’s all about. Mom, Dad, I have something I need to tell you. You know how I’m never home at night and I’m always hanging around those guys. Well, it’s because I’m a ninja. (Sob, Sob) I know you don’t approve but it is who I am. Did you hear the N’Sync song? It rocks. ---
**Author:** ![Wolverine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba9def/32.png) [@Wolverine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolverine)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/50 "2001-02-20T21:47:01Z")
What’s the secret hand signal again for “I have to go to the bathroom?” Top five marial arts songs exculisevly from the eighties. Scrunch or fold? (Toilet paper for those not in the know) You put your right foot in, you pull your right foot out. You put your right foot in and you shake it all about. You do the Hokey-Pokey and you turn yourself around. That’s what it’s all about. Mom, Dad, I have something I need to tell you. You know how I’m never home at night and I’m always hanging around those guys. Well, it’s because I’m a ninja. (Sob, Sob) I know you don’t approve but it is who I am. Did you hear the N’Sync song? It rocks. ---
**Author:** ![red\_dragon60](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@red\_dragon60](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/red_dragon60)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/51 "2001-02-20T23:15:12Z")
WASABI! ---
**Author:** ![Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/52 "2001-02-20T23:33:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kilt-wearin’ man \* > \*\* > > 1. “We are a bush. Move along. Nothing to see here…” > > \*\* [nitpick] You mean: “We are a hedge. Please move along.” [/nitpick] ::runs away using his very-quick-speed:: ---
**Author:** ![Nymysys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f6c823/32.png) [@Nymysys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymysys)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/53 "2001-02-20T23:45:30Z")
Do you ever feel like there’s more out there, man? I mean, yeah, we’re ninjas and like a billion guys out there wanna be us, but I’m just not…dammit, I’m just not fulfilled! Wouldn’t it be cool to go to the same job everyday, sit at the same desk, see the same people and get to go home at 500p? Ooooohhh…and have a CUBICLE! Those lucky bastards… ---
**Author:** ![douglips](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@douglips](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/douglips)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/54 "2001-02-20T23:45:43Z")
I was going to say that, **Some Guy** , but I was mesmerized by your hypnotic tie. ---
**Author:** ![Spookythecat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@Spookythecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spookythecat)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/55 "2001-02-21T02:17:42Z")
Oh wow. My very first post. I’m all aquiver. Oh Man! My wife’s gonna kill me! Do you know how hard it is to get blood outta silk! ``` Aiiiiiiiiiir-Shuriken! Do we really have to kill him? How about a stern talking too. Scoff if you will, Yushido, but studies show that a hard-hat and steel-toed boots reduece work place injuries by 40%! Hey, that wasn't so hard. ``` ---
**Author:** ![Spookythecat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@Spookythecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spookythecat)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/56 "2001-02-21T02:19:24Z")
Oh dear God. I misspelled too. Now everyone’s gonna hate me. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/57 "2001-02-21T02:26:05Z")
1. “Yes Barbara, I did cry. But it hurt. It really did.” 2. “I’m A Barbie Girl, in my Barbie world” 3. “Master, we’re out of Snapple” ---
**Author:** ![Mnementh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mnementh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnementh)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/58 "2001-02-21T04:27:05Z")
“So, can I get those nunchaku coated with hot pink fur? I mean, it wont hurt a lot, but it’d be so _cute_…” “Okay, look. I’ll close my eyes and start yelling MARCO! and when I do you have to yell POLO! and I’ll follow the sound and try to kill you…” ---
**Author:** ![Ad\_Noctum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@Ad\_Noctum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ad_Noctum)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/59 "2001-02-21T04:35:42Z")
[post] Happy 200 Mnem [/post, back to OP] OMG!! I’m so sorry, are you alright?!? ::sound of pants falling:: DAMN, I can’t believe I STILL haven’t that whole put-the-sword-in-the-sheath thingy!!! ---
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2001, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146/60 "2001-02-21T10:52:25Z")
I’d better not do this. I only have 12 hit points left. C’mon! Give it back! C’mon! I finally understand Auto Racing. And now for something completely different… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-ninjas-dont-say/55146.md?page=4)