# Things NOT to say during sex **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [October 17, 2015, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896 "2015-10-17T14:09:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2016, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/201 "2016-09-09T18:07:15Z")
“I’ve heard of cauliflower ear… but who the hell has been punching your Cooch!?” ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/202 "2016-09-14T19:41:17Z")
That reminds me, we need guacamole. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2016, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/203 "2016-09-14T22:47:02Z")
Here, it’s for you. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2016, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/204 "2016-09-16T15:08:11Z")
You really should see a doctor about that. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2016, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/205 "2016-09-16T15:10:51Z")
“I’m sorry if you don’t like it, but I can’t return your 100€.” ---
**Author:** ![katpohl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b782af/32.png) [@katpohl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/katpohl)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2016, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/206 "2016-09-16T21:23:29Z")
I met your old girl friend today , we compared notes, it’s a pretty short list. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2016, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/207 "2016-09-18T20:00:03Z")
Now … let’s see … how is this done? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2016, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/208 "2016-09-18T20:13:30Z")
Blood… blood… blood… blood… blood… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2016, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/209 "2016-09-19T16:52:27Z")
I wonder if Bigfoot is real? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2016, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/210 "2016-09-22T22:55:59Z")
Ok, all the people whose name starts with A-M: get on top! ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2016, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/211 "2016-09-23T00:00:15Z")
" No, my name really is Fanny Felcher. Why do you ask?" ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2016, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/212 "2016-09-24T01:39:54Z")
Stop! It doesn’t bend that way! ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2016, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/213 "2016-09-24T01:56:15Z")
It’s an oldie, but goodie… “Is it in yet?” ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2016, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/214 "2016-10-02T13:02:53Z")
Likewise: “Is that as far in as it goes?” ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2016, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/215 "2016-10-02T21:39:09Z")
Oh no, it’s not starved for oxygen…it’s stained from Miracle Gro. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2016, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/216 "2016-10-03T00:04:25Z")
“What’s this on my finger?” ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2016, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/217 "2016-10-03T09:23:48Z")
Your father said you did it better than this. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2016, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/218 "2016-10-07T02:32:23Z")
I’m gonna get all Mike Pence on you, baby. ---
**Author:** ![Victor\_Charlie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7ea924/32.png) [@Victor\_Charlie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Victor_Charlie)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2016, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/219 "2016-10-17T02:38:17Z")
I got the test results back. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2016, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896/221 "2016-10-27T08:08:57Z")
This reminds me of my ex. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-not-to-say-during-sex/734896.md?page=12)